Please... (Mavi/PTX)

6

Nothing mattered anymore. No street signs, no stop lights, no snow. I sped through the busy streets nearly getting us killed once. Kirstie screamed for me to slow down but I couldn't. I wanted to get immediate help, taking in all the costs and risks.  He needed someone to get him out of there, out of his personal hell and I didn't care if I would find myself behind bars because of speeding. When I finally saw Kevin's house I slammed down on the breaks, bringing the car to an abrupt stop. Kirstie hit my arm repeatedly but I couldn't feel it hurting. My mind was still there with him. It was as if my soul and body had detached. My body was in my car next to Kirstie, in front of Kevin's house. My soul.. my soul was still looking through the dirty window and into his eyes, the windows to his feelings and thoughts. I didn't knew I was crying, I didn't hear Kirstie yelling at me, I didn't hear or see Kevin knock on my window. I just saw him.

"Mitch! For God's sake! Answer!"

She had her grip around my arm, shaking me back and forth but my hands didn't leave the wheel. My stare was focused on the falling snow while I saw his broken body from my inner eye, I forgot how to breathe and gulp, nothing worked anymore.

"Mitch?! Open!"

Kevin looked between me and Kirstie, I could see it but I couldn't act. My body was frozen. Somehow he managed to open the door and yank at my seatbelt, getting me out of the car. My limbs didn't work causing me to fall into his arms, catching me.

"You're more than pale! Oh my.. Kirstie we need to get him inside! His heart is beating too fast!"

I wanted to tell them that my heart was perfectly fine, I was perfectly fine but I knew that he wasn't and would never be. Not if we wouldn't act immediately. A fallen angel, broken wings unable to fly again. Heaven had closed his gates to take in this broken creation. They carried me inside and laid me down on Kevin's bed, a cold washcloth was placed on my forhead. Emergency care for the ill, but I wasn't ill! 

"Stop that!"

I jumped up and distanced myself from them. Why didn't they understand?!.. I was going insane!

"Mitch, calm down. We're just trying to help.."

Kirstie, the one who had seen the same horror as I. The person who was by my side and seemed much more scared than myself, she who wanted us to leave as soon as possible, the girl who had just seen an innocent young man being beaten to the max and yelled at as if he wasn't worth anything. She told me to calm down and to accept her help! What was she thinking?!

"Kirstin! I'm fine! Haven't you seen him? The guy who nearly died just because he went home? The guy who got beaten because of what? Being late?! Have you already forgotten about him?!"

"I haven't please don't yell at me.."

"I can't! Want to know why?! Because I ran away! I ran away and didn't help. While you're taking care of me I can tell you that he is most likely sobbing and crying because of all the pain!"

I sat back down on the bed and burried my face in my hands, letting my tears flow. I left because I wanted to get help but I didn't realize that I had turned my back on him. He needed me in that moment and I just ran away. I used to do that a lot when I was younger. Running away from my problems, hoping they would go away one day. They stayed and doubled, crashed down on me when I least expected them to.. How many years did he had to go through this kind of torture? How many years of sadness, pain and fear did he experience? Why hasn't he escaped already? Kirstie took my hands away from my face and slowly started to massage them while she spoke to me in a calm tone, Kevin listened.

"You did the right thing. We wouldn't have been a great help if we would've just stormed in there... We can tell Kevin and Scott now, then we can figure out how to help.."

"He might be dead by then.."

I whimpered, darting my hurting eyes to the floor. Death had two sides. It was a redeemer for those who suffered, those who had nothing to live for, those who believed death was the only exit. It was a contemplation for those who went on living, for those who were responsible for their death, for those who didn't help, for those who wondered why they had done it and why they themselves didn't prevent it. In the end, you yourself were either dead or alive. 

And I was determined to keep him alive.

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#Yanie