Can't Get Enough

4.

4.

He broke away, only to say what we'd both been thinking.

"I want you." He rested his forehead on mine, looking me deep in the eyes. I closed mine.

"Why are we doing this again?" I softly spoke.

"L, don't..." He began. I sat up and shifted off of him.

"No, why are we? Last time we tried...whatever 'this'.." I motioned my hands in an odd order between us to signify what I meant. "...is, it didn't end well. We just got on speaking terms. If we can't be friends without keeping our hands off eachother, how are we supposed to work if we can't date?" He pulled his legs in toward his body, hugging them.

"There you go, over analyzing everything. How 'bout you just live for today, L? What if you were to die tomorrow, and this would be the day you were remembered by? Does studying in your living room make you proud? Or does spending time with the one you love seem more accurate?" The one you love...did I love Harry? Could I possibly love someone who I was sure I was in love with for almost ten years, then threw it all away? Does he even love me? Not making eye contact, I mumbled.

"Did you ever stop loving me?"

Harry's POV

"Did you ever stop loving me?"

My mind took me back to freshman year, the night we ended things.

--

"Harry, where are you?! It's dark and I'm getting scared."

"I'll be there in a minute, calm down."

--

It was January, and I'd stolen my mom's car to take L and I on a little cruise. She's been against it, but I wore her down. We were in another county when I got a text from Louis saying he scored mollie. I told him I was with Leila, but he said now or never. I don't know what I was thinking, leaving her stranded in an unfamiliar place. No doubt the stupidest thing I've ever done. When I met Leila, we were six, and from the moment she told me during lunch time that she was going to rule the world one day, I was sure I was in love with her. But then I finally got her and ditched her for a drug I kinda already knew was fake...it always made me wonder if I really ever did love her or loved the idea of a girl with so much certainty in her life. So when she asked me that question, I was at a loss. I studied Leila, not knowing how to answer. I think that's why Leila and I clicked so well, she's so sure of herself, and I don't know what I'm doing, and opposites attract. Maybe we're just too opposite for each other, but I do know that I've never stopped thinking about her since.

Leila's POV

He stayed silent. I instantly regretted asking him, everything got awkward. I was grateful when I heard Harry's phone go off. He seemed to have been jolted out if a deep thought. I studied his strong fingers fly across the screen grew instantly jealous of how a phone got more attention than me.

"My counselor is coming to my house to talk about my GPA, so...I should go." He said finally.

"Oh. Okay." He awkwardly hugged me, grabbed his books and bag, and swiftly exited the atmosphere of awkward. I was starting to feel unsure about Harry, a concept I was foreign with. Then I heard a Big Bang of my back door. Mom was home.

"Hey, Leila! Did I just see Harry's car down the street? Was he here?! Did I miss him?"

"Hi, mom." I tried not to show my annoyance. My mother will be a preppy sorority girl until she dies. Even though she works a 9-5 at a local bank. Everyone loves Bubbly Beth. Honestly, her happy personality was great when you're happy, but this was not the time.

She set her bags down on the kitchen table and faced me, leaning on the table.

"Are you guys yknow...?" She lifted her eyebrows.

"Mom, it's not like that." I sighed from the living room and tried to focus more on my schoolwork.

"Shame, I always liked him. Such a sweet boy. So does that mean there's someone else in the picture for my beautiful girl?" I could practically hear her smile. Jesus.

"No, mom. I need to focus on school."

"Leila, I'm very proud that education is important to you, but you should live a little! You haven't hung out with Michelle in weeks! I just want to know you're happy, honey." I wished she would calm down. Sometimes she really works my nerves up.

"Mom, I'm fine." She was right though. I didn't like being distant from Michelle. She saved me freshman year on that night id rather forget. She was a senior, and I should spend more time with her. I decided to text her with plans for Friday. Thankfully, she cheerfully responded.

"Oh, I miss you so much! I'd love to!! Come sit at our lunch table tomorrow, please? (:"

It would be nice to sit with someone else for a change...so I decided to be reckless and agree. It wasn't really a life changing decision, but it was in my book. Feeling satisfied, I was about to throw my phone on the couch and study when I got another vibration signaling an incoming text. The caller ID said Zayn, which was weird, considering I never saved his number.

"I'm outside (;"

How Repulsive.