Alone on the water

CHAPTER NINE

*chapter 9*

It's kind of short sorry

Harry and I got to the movie theater shortly after he picked me up. I left my phone at home which probably wasn't the best idea, but I won't need it so why should I worry?

Harry paid for the tickets, snacks, and drinks. I felt bad for him and apologized countless times as we sat down in our seats for the movie.

"I promise I'll pay you back Harry" I said.

"Mimi really, it's fine. My treat" he smiled and those dimples that every girl loves showed up.

I half smiled at him and sat back in my chair, I still felt bad that he had to spend all this money on a stupid movie when we could rent one and hang out at home. But whatever, I was with Harry Styles and that's all that mattered.

We didn't kiss or anything during the movie, we touched hands every once in a while when we grabbed popcorn but nothing big happened. On the rise home it was quiet and awkward, the movie wasn't very good and Harry pretty much spent all that money for nothing.

He pulled up into my driveway and I sat in the car for a minute, waiting for someone to say something.

"I had fun tonight, maybe we could do this again?" Harry looked at me.

I nodded, "yeah, that'd be cool"

We sat in silence for a little longer. Then I decided to get out, I said goodbye and thank you again but Harry stopped me.

"Oh, and Mimi. If you ever want to...you know, go out with me I would really like that" he smiled.

I looked down at the ground, "but there's also Niall-"

"He obviously doesn't know what has standing right in front of him. Just know that I can give you more than he can, I'd pay more attention to you. Don't forget that Mimi, I'll talk to you later"

I closed the door and he drove off. I know and he knows I'm not going out with Niall but it could happen. Harry said it himself, that he could always give me more than Niall could. But I shook that out if my head. Niall and I were just...friends. And so was Harry and I, if you would even call us friends.

I walked inside and there was no sign of Taylor, my mom, or dad. I walked quietly to my room and saw my phone sitting face down on my bed. I picked it up and unlocked it, I noticed a bunch of text messages and calls from Niall, asking where I was and if I was okay. I rolled my eyes, he can be so dramatic sometimes. I decide to call him back, and after the first ring he answers.

"Mimi?! Where have you been!? Are you okay?!" Niall seems really worried.

"I'm fine, I just went out for a little"

"We were supposed to hang out tonight, remember?" He puts some force into the word remember.

I totally forgot about that, to be completely honest I think I forgot about anything Niall said to me today after Harry asked me to the movies.

"I had last minute plans I couldn't refuse"

"What "last minute plans"? You didn't tell me about this?" He was getting pissed.

"Someone...someone asked me to go out tonight" I stuttered on my words.

"Who?"

"It's not really any of your business now is it?"

"I'm coming over, bye" and Niall hung up.

I sighed and fell back onto my bed. Niall loved to start drama didn't he? Always had to know all about my life and everything in it. I was tired of if, but at the same time I loved it...maybe he was just trying to take care of me.

Minutes later, Niall was in my room. Pacing back and forth, while asking me a bunch of questions that I wouldn't answer.

"Who did you go out with tonight?" He asked getting even more angrier.

"That's none of your business Niall"

"Yes it is!"

"How?" I ask putting my hands on my hips.

"Because I'm your friend and I deserve to know these things"

"Fine! You want to know so bad?! I went out with Harry, the most popular guy in school!"

I watch Niall's face go white. What was his problem? He acts like I just told him I had cancer or something. He stepped back a little.

"Why'd you do that?" He asks as if I did something wrong.

"Why do you care? you're not my boyfriend!" I screamed.

Then Niall's face went blank, no expression, no color, nothing. It shouldn't have mattered to him anyways, it's not like he said we were anything more than friends.

"Right, cool. Um I hope you have fun with Harry, I don't think we should be uh friends anymore" Niall said stepping out of my room and into the hallway, i followed him.

"What? Niall I didn't mean-"

"Save it Mimi" he cut me off "I'm tired of this game we're playing. Ill see you around"

I stopped walking and stopped in the hallway, I watched him walk to the front door, open it, then walk out. I stood in the middle of the hallway like and idiot. I didn't know why I said anything to him, I could've just said I took a really long nap or something. I walked into my room and sat on my bed staring at the floor, then looking at my hands and making my way to my arms. I stood back up and walked to my dresser, opened the top drawer, and looked for my blade.

When I found it a smile came across my face. I held the cold, metal blade in my hand. It sent chills up my body and there was practically a little voice in my head telling me;

"Do it, no one will know, do it, you know you crave the pain, you know you want to see your blood rushing down your arm, do it"

I shook my head and spoke to myself.

"No, I can't do it. It's not fair to Taylor, Niall, even Harry. I'm not doing it"

I tried putting it away but something stopped me. I just couldn't put it away, I brought it out for a reason and I needed to get it over with. I looked down at my arm, my sweatshirt sleeve was pushed up my arm so all my scars were visible. I lowered the freezing cold blade onto my arm.

"Just do it" I begged myself.

A few tears fell down my face, I closed my eyes. then I dragged the blade hard and fast across my skin. I opened my eyes and saw the blood coming out. It was faster than I remember, I added another cut, and another. Soon there was 5 fresh cuts on my arm. I cried even harder, not because of the pain but because of what I did, I yelled at Niall for no reason at all.

I went into the bathroom, still sobbing, and I started washing my arm off trying to stop the blood, it wouldn't stop. I was starting to feel a little light headed. I grabbed a washcloth and sat on the toilet seat, I finally pulled myself together and stopped crying. I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror, I just let everyone down by doing that, including myself.

My face was all puffy and red, my arm was red and swollen around my fresh new cuts. I walked out of the bathroom to see Taylor and my parents walking in the house. I stopped and looked at them, they looked at me. I slowly put my sweatshirt sleeves down to cover the cuts up.

"Honey, you look like you've been crying" my mom says walking over to me.

"I just went out for a run, it's a little cold outside" I sniffled.

"Next time wear a winter jacket, we don't need you to get sick" my dad says walking past me into my parents bedroom.

"Yes dad. Mom, I'm just going to go to bed now, I'm not feeling very well"

She nods, kisses my forehead and sends me to me room. I sit on my bed and sniffle again, I pick my phone up and go to Harry's contact. The phone rings over and over again. Then he finally picks up.

"I'd knew you'd call" he says.

"I think I want to take your offer"

-end of chapter-