Dear Daughter | ✔

एक

Dear Daughter,
Fourteen years, eleven months, ten days, and quite a few hours earlier was the first time I laid my eyes on you. The last time I did so was three days after that incident when I left you in hysterics on the doorstep of the orphanage. I failed once back then, and it has taken me this long to recover from the pain of my actions.

My dear little girl, how are you doing? How was your day? Are you enjoying the life your mother and I left you?

I do not know if you will believe me, but I hope you do. For starters, I am your father. You might be shocked at this revelation; you are no orphan, little girl.

More often than not, your mother and I have missed you dearly. I often thought of meeting you and telling you who we were to you, but I was scared, dear. It is not easy to own up to and accept your mistakes, even at this age. But do remember that it is always better to reminisce than regret. My life is full of what ifs but I genuinely hope your life has the necessary amount of remember whens.

You were young when your mother left us, but do know that she loved you. She loved you for the nine months that she knew you, and I assure you, that even from up there, she keeps an eye on both of us. She hopes that one day your father will finally gather the courage to come up to you, hold you in his arms, and call you what he yearns to call you. He misses you, little girl, and I hope you miss your old man too.

If you think it was easy for either of us to leave you alone, remember it was not. Your mother had no choice but to go, whereas I am your culprit. I had a choice. I could have chosen to cherish you, but I was selfish. I got scared, little girl. And scared, I left you all alone here; a place where you had no one to call your own.

Whenever you feel abandoned, or whenever you feel that you are not loved, do remember that you are wrong. You are absolutely wrong. I love you, little girl. And so does your mother. We loved you as soon as we got to know about you, and we will love you till the day we are forced to forget you. To be honest, even then we will not stop loving you.

You are a diamond already. And I left you, for I did not wish to be the dirt covering you. I did not want to dull your shine with my past. You might be wondering why I did what I did. I was never there when you started walking, neither was I there when you uttered your first word. I agree I am at fault. Guilty, but I had my own reasons, little girl. Reasons I will dwell into in my future letters to you.

I hope you get this letter soon, and I hope that you forgive me for all my mistakes and all my flaws. My dear daughter, I do not know if you think of me as your father, but to me, you will always be my little girl.

Always and Forever,
Your Father.
May 1, 1999.