markson: discoveries

23 : Not My Jackson

hey I know it's been awhile since I've updated so read the last chapter before starting this one as a refresher because this one picks up immediately where the other one ends.
love you guys

Jackson's POV

And she kissed me.

Sojin kissed me, a hand on my cheek, her soft, pink lips moving against mine in a sort of slow melodious harmony. And what I did, what I did in that situation, it really scared me.
I kissed her back.

In that moment, Mark completely escaped my mind.

Mark who I love so dearly.
I forgot about him, I betrayed him.

And I couldn't believe myself.

The kiss was short, it was only seconds before I slowly pulled away. My forehead was resting against Sojin's, she was sniffling, her wet tears were dripping onto my cheeks. She was crying. She was crying because she knew this was wrong just as well as I did. She knew that being more than best friends couldn't work. She knew.

3rd Person

"Sojin.. Oh Sojin.." Jackson whispered quietly with a light shake of his head, his hands cupping the smaller girl's cheeks. "I'm so sorry.. But I can't do this," He whispered to Sojin, wiping her tears with the pad of his thumb before he moved his face away from hers and stood. "I'm going to leave, and I don't know when I'm going to come back. But I need you to forget about loving me, forget about your feelings for me, before I get back," Jackson told her, voice calm, gentle, as he headed towards the door. And Sojin nodded her head lightly.

"I'll try, I'll really really try Jackson. But I don't think any amount of time is going to fix this. I think we both know that," Sojin told Jackson, still quite sniffly, with a soft nod. And Jackson nodded in reply, with a light sigh before he walked out of the hospital room.

Jackson's POV

I walked out of the cold hospital and into the even colder outdoors. I quickly found my way to my car, slipping into the seat and slamming the door shut. I let my head fall back against the seat.

I was so distraught, so confused. How could I let that happen? How could I be so stupid? How could I let my ex girlfriend fall in love with me again?

Why had I enjoyed kissing her?

All the questions buzzing through my head were giving me a headache and I just didn't want to think anymore. I didn't want to think about the boyfriend I'd betrayed or the best friend I'd left waiting or the choices I'd have to make now. I didn't at all and I knew a solution.

..

It only took 15 minutes of driving to find a suitable hole in the wall bar with a bartender who didn't seem to care that I didn't have an ID.

And it only took 4 beers before my drunken mind was telling me I needed to get home to Mark as soon as I could.

3rd Person

So it wasn't very long before a very drunk Jackson was climbing into his car to begin the hours drive home to Mark. And yes even drunk, Jackson knew he shouldn't be driving. But he was so motivated to get back to Mark he didn't care. Because in his state of drunkenness Jackson figured out what he was going to do.

So swerving and wobbling down the road, Jackson eventually made it home to the apartment he and Mark shared. He was awfully proud of himself for not getting in an accident as drunk as he was.

So he stumbled his way up to the apartment and unlocked the door, looking to the couch where a surprised Mark sat. Hearing the click of the door, Mark looked over, smiling to see Jackson standing in the doorframe.