Hiccup x Astrid Just a dream

Chapter44

Astrid

It was a rainy sad morning..
At the med hall was a small funeral for Hiccup. Gobber had spent the night making a casket for him and saying goodbye to his only blacksmith apprentice... Valka and I were the only ones in the medhall right now. No one in Berk had even woken up yet. But neither of us could sleep...so we came early to say goodbye... We watched as gobber and snotlout carried in Hiccup's lifeless body. I stood as soon as I noticed them. Too nerve racked to sit still..... Snotlout looked at me and gave a faint smile. The only time I'd ever seen him act civil and like a normal person. Almost like he would miss Hiccup as much as I would... I walked next to them staring at Hiccup's lifeless but somehow still completely handsome face. They placed him in the middle of the room. It was hard to believe that two weeks ago after I had turned 20, hiccup had proposed. I look at the ring on my finger and tears began to fall. I put my hand (the one with the ring)over his, his hand with the ring on it.

His hand way cold. Freezing cold. Looking at him I thought he would wake up and hug me and tell me its all right....that everything is alright.....

but he wont...

he's gone.. although something inside me tells me not to worry... that someday ill be able to see hiccup again..... his smile, hear his laugh, feel his warmth, his love, his kiss...

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________
hours later

after everyone had gone to see hiccup we had a little tribute ceremony for him outside the med Hall as Gobber sent his body away on a boat that was supposed to be a pyre but Valka and i decided not to do that....since it was soon after Stoick... another pyre would just be heartbreaking..so as we said our last goodbyes, everyone in town gathered in front of the med hall. they lit candles and we all stood so close it was if we had actually started a fire instead of just small single candles. we stood right at the place where hiccup had died... where he was last seen alive... as Gobber speaks aloud i barely pay any attention.
i barely notice when ruff, tuff and fishlegs hands land on my shoulders and snotlout appears and puts a gentle hand on my back, underneath my hood. they all comfort me and whisper soothing things in my ears

it was then that i lost it. tears fell down my cheeks almost as quickly as my friends appeared behind me.

i was sobbing louder that anyone around us... i couldn't even stand anymore. my knees buckled and i fell to the ground my face in my hands

Gobber stopped talking, my friends fell to the ground with me, fishlegs took my candle and blew it out before taking my hand, ruff took my other, snotlout and tuff continued to whisper to me, all the while Gobber pulled me into his arms,

i gasped a big breath my lips trembling...

"why'd he have to leave me?
why'd he have to go?
i was counting on forever
now ill never know..."

"its alright lass... i promise"

"you will always have us."

"always"

"well help you through this"

" we will never leave you astrid we wont let you face this alone"

ruff, snotlout, tuff and fishlegs all joined in after Gobber. speaking out loud for the first time today.

"you will always have your mother in law too astrid... you still have a family.. i know its hard losing your first love but we will get through this...together.. as one"
Valka had joined us now.

i cried more before answering.

" thank you...t-thank you so much...i-i can always count on you guys...
but its so hard"my voice was a whisper now. " its like im looking from the background at everyone. " i look at two women whispering to each other. "the chiefs fiancee.." "poor girl" i sigh before going on. " like im standing by myself alone and no one seems to notice i hear them talking about him, saying he's never coming home now that he really is gone this time......

but God please this doesn't feel like anything.... but a dream... it cant be real... this cant be happening to me...

this....t-this is.. just a dream.."