You Still There? (Larry Stylinson) *editing*

Chapter Fourteen [Harry]

Chapter Fourteen [Harry]



Friday, 24th February...



I found Louis' email to Liam, and I felt hurt. Betrayed. Guilty. I felt like I was the reason he left. He didn't even want to tell me that he was okay. No, he wanted to tell Liam and not anyone else. He wanted Liam to close the door because he had already walked away. I could just sit there and watch, watch how he left and how I couldn't get him back. No matter what I said.



I found it one day while we all stayed at Liam's. I just walked past his laptop, that was switched on and the email from Louis was the first one on the list. I just accidentally noticed it and decided to read it. I was quiet all day after and the boys gave me confused looks, but I didn't care in the slightest. I was occupied with fighting back tears and trying not to be mean. Although I'm not sure if just sitting, doing nothing and ignoring everything, just staring at nothing counted as mean.



What made me mad the most was that he knew I would get upset and in fact I did get upset. Additionally he told Liam to take care of me. As if I wasn't a normal grown-up adult who could look after himself.



What made me curious was the fact that he mentioned me alone. It was "Harry and you guys". I wasn't included in the rest of the group.



Did that mean he cared more about me? I really didn't want to get my hopes up, but there was no hope anymore anyway. It was now exactly 13 days since the last email and I hadn't written any since. But I was still mad and full of questions.



I spent my time thinking about Louis and Louis and me together, us. How we met each other in the bathroom, how he knew I'd get famous, how we ended up in a band together. And I realized it wasn't just a stupid crush on my best friend.. the thing I had.. I had fallen in love. I loved Louis, I truly did. Maybe I never really made sure he knew I loved him at least like a best friend and brother. Maybe he didn't know how much I actually cared about him, how I'd do anything for him and to get him back. Even though I could only tell him in one way now, I would do it. I would write him a last email. What would I have to be afraid of? Him leaving? He already left. Him hating me? I probably wouldn't see him anymore anyway.



So I took my laptop and logged in on my email account. I wrote exactly four words in my email after 13 days nothing. I didn't feel the need to write more. What I said with those four words couldn't be described or explained. It was just a fact and now everyone had to live with it. I hit the send- button and leaned back, sighing quietly, not allowing myself to regret what I had done.



Maybe Louis had given up after almost two weeks and deleted his email address. Maybe he wouldn't get to read it... But I didn't allow myself to worry, I don't know how long I actually sat there, doing nothing, but at some point Liam called me to come downstairs and eat lunch. For the first time in at least 13 days I had a small smile on my lips.



Love can make you extremely happy or heartbroken, I've heard. But my heart was already broken and having realized that I was in love with Louis, I was kind of happy to be honest. If Louis and I were meant to be, he'd come back, I'd see him again. Maybe. I didn't know. But this time the uncertainty didn't pull me down. I didn't have much to fear anymore. At least that's what I felt like that day. Louis was away already. Maybe I wouldn't ever see again. So maybe he hated me. We didn't have to meet ever again. And maybe there was still a slight chance that he'd come back. I thought, I had done everything I could now.



The others gave me slightly confused looks, sensing my bit of happiness, that was gone since Louis left and never came back in the slightest until now.



"Something up?", Zayn asked, raising an eyebrow.



"No, just love. I'm in love with Louis. For real.. So like.. I love him. And I told him. And I realized I can't really do anything anyway. Maybe I'll never see him again and maybe he'll come back.", I explained and shrugged slightly, sitting down and eating. To be honest, I have no clue what made me think that way. It was probably just one of those things you can't explain.



I spent the day with the others, rather carefree and it didn't seem strange at all. The boys decided they could leave me alone again and probably were a little puzzled that I seemed to get over Louis leaving just as I realized that I actually loved him.



But I didn't get over it. It was probably just a rather good day.








He found it?? yes, right
He wrote 4 words?? Exactly.

Thoughts?

You'll hear more about what the others (Niall, Liam and Zayn) are doing and thinking in the sequel because it will be written in third person again :) I hope you guys like it and the chapters should get longer.
I most likely will take some time to upload it though..

Thanks for all your lovely comments all the time (: you guys are awesome!

xx