Fall (Bangtan Sonyeondan BTS Alternate Universe)

37. Fight

It had been 2 weeks. 2 weeks of self doubt. 2 weeks of frustration. It was quite possibly one of the worst few weeks of my life.

I couldn't find a legitimate place for myself in the group, and the thought that I was free-loading with them was driving me mad. I didn't deserve to be here, and I was painfully aware that I had no true place.

Namjoon wasn't helping, either. He was being secretive, and every time I tried to ask him about anything, he got all defensive and angry. I would've given it up, but I was pissed.

He was still writing away on that stupid secret paper that he wouldn't let me see. I don't know if it was a letter or what - it was turning it into a novel though.

I had searched for it, of course, but I couldn't find it. I knew I didn't need to know about everything in his life, and he wasn't in my business about my life, but I figured that's because he didn't care.

He had yelled at me. It wasn't a big deal really, but it was a shock to me. I had tried going out without getting his permission - I knew he was the leader, but I really didn't think he would be that guy, who insisted on calling all of the shots, actually all of them.

I felt like I couldn't even go to the fucking bathroom without asking him first at this point, and that was definitely not something I wanted to feel. It was no way to live, definitely not for me.

I had never really been the kind to take orders kindly. I didn't like being bossed around, and Namjoon was pushing it with his new rules.

He had taken a complete 180°, he was getting on everyone's asses, putting up new rules and actually enforcing them now. No going out without explicitly describing everything you were doing, no leaving the building without a plan and permission.

And those were the ones that made the most sense. It's like he had changed; nobody dared to even say the name Namjoon anymore, except for me. And even I got a stern glare when I said it. The playful leader was definitely not the man that was living with us anymore.

Ever since a job - that nobody would tell me about - went south, his attitude was sour and standoffish. He was distant and unfriendly, even more so than he usually was.

Nobody would tell me anything, and Angel wasn't talking either. I felt alone, as much as I hated to say it. They kept giving me concerned looks, when they thought I wasn't looking.

Oh but I saw, and I definitely didn't appreciate it. They were treating me like some damaged little kid. Didn't they know what I've done?

I'm definitely not a child, and they're treating me like I'm sensitive and fragile when I was probably one of the most insensitive ones in the group.

My patience was long past run out. It had expired a long time ago, and at this point I don't know what I was doing.

I asked Angel to leave with me. She didn't say a word, just stared at me. Her eyes looked soulless. I accepted that I had lost her to the group.

I was on my own.

Well, I wasn't going to stay here and let everyone treat me like a baby who didn't deserve to know the intricate details of what happened to the group. I wasn't even allowed to go on jobs anymore, and I was done just staying home.

Namjoon, Yoongi, and Star were gone, so I figured now was the best time to leave.

I packed a bag, filling it with my best clothes. I wouldn't take anything that wasn't mine; I wouldn't give them a reason to come after me. I doubt they'd come after me if I just disappeared like this.

I shouldered the bag and left Namjoon's room, shaking off the nervous tremble in my arms. I forced my legs to move quickly, not giving then a chance to shake.

As I walked through the party room, V said nothing; his feline eyes stared at me, and I wouldn't lie - I felt intimidated.

With all the things he's done, there was definitely reason to be intimidated. He's killed more people than anyone else in the group. He didn't talk about it, but he got a crazy look in his eyes and stared at his hands whenever someone mentioned it.

I couldn't tell if he was horrified of the fact or what. At times, he seemed like a fluffy little puppy, but I knew that wasn't the case. He was dangerous.

Hell, they all were. Even Jimin, sweet little Jimin. I had walked in on him 'interrogating' someone once. I would never forget how bloody they were. He wouldn't look at me in the eyes after that. Almost like he was ashamed.

I almost made it to the door before J-Hope ran over to me.

This, this was the only hard part.

He stared at me, his pleading brown eyes almost convincing me to stay.

"I'm sorry Hobi, I've got to go. I can't stay here."

He gave me a sad look before stepping out of my way. I would ask him to come with me, but I knew he'd never leave. Jimin was here, so he would stay.

I hoped he wouldn't get in trouble for this.

I sent him an apologetic smile before running into the woods, in case Namjoon was on his way back. Running into him was definitely not a good way to go.

My heart hammered the entire time. I was on my own. I had left. I had actually left.

God, what if they sent Suga to kill me? What if they thought I was a threat? I kind of was - I knew where they lived. God, the Double Dragon would kill for that information.

I made it to town, and my heart didn't calm down at all. Funny, I was a part of a gang, and I was still scared to walk in the dark. I was the one people were scared of meeting in the dark.

I was alone, and I was most likely a prime target. I could only hope the right person found me before some worthless little wannabe thug came after me.

I had made it through a few alleys before I heard it.

The distinct echo that was just too slightly off to be mine.

Footsteps.

Someone was following me.

I smirked, continuing to walk as if I didn't hear it.

There was definitely more than one of them. I could count 3, and I knew there was bound to be more ahead of me.

The moon hardly illuminated the dark alley, only a small circle ahead of me lit up. But I could tell that there were people ahead, waiting for me.

I hoped they were there; if they weren't, I'd look really stupid soon.

I took a few more steps and then stopped, crossing my arms and cocking my head.

As soon as I stopped someone grabbed me from behind, holding my neck in their arms. A cool pressure was pushed to my temple.

A gun.

The people ahead stepped forward, and I laughed.

"I was wondering when you'd show up."