Killafornia

IV.

Killafornia

Vanity

He stood there just staring till finally I broke the silence by clearing my throat. He stepped into the room and gently closed the door behind, careful not to make a noise.

"How are you out?" I asked in a bit of a shrill voice but he didn't break his stare.

"Who's the little baby girl in your lap." He finally said when he brought his eyes to mine. "Vanity-"

"It's not what you're thinking. She's not my child, I just watch her for the woman in the room next to mine. Her name is Joy and she lives up to her name. She's brought me happiness while I've been here." I said with a smile as he took a seat on the bed next to me. "She's napping now but she's adorable when she's awake."

"Thank God." He said with a breath of relief to follow. "I'm not even going to lie, I was scared that she was yours and mortified if she was mine but now I feel ten times better than a few seconds ago."

"Let me put her in the crib." I said when I got off the bed and walked across the small room where the crib was set up. It was a crib that easily rolled from room to room and I set Joy down before making my way over to CJ, being pulled down onto his lap and embraced in a hug that melted away all my troubles. I've missed everything about him, from the scent of his room all the way to his sour attitude, I missed it all.

"Why are you basically in a mental institution?" He asked against my neck as his hands made their way up the back of my shirt so he was rubbing my bare skin.

"Things went downhill so fast and I didn't know what to do, where to go or who to go to. Emotionally I wasn't stable at all. Not after knowing and drugged and slept with... well you know, I felt an all new level of disgust with myself. The voices telling me to pop a pill to clear this all away was heavy in my ear. I tried to go to work at the restaurant to keep my mind busy but it was terrible. I left the job, moved out and was in my car for a few days till I decided I needed rehab. They deemed me as mentally unstable and I was placed here." I shrugged sitting back on his lap. "I don't want you mad at me, I did what I thought was best so I didn't hurt myself or others. Then Joy was born and I was asked to watch her and she made me smile, helping me cope I guess."

"V, I'm not mad. I'm proud you finally took your life into your own hands but going out to get help instead of waiting for someone to tell you to get help. I think it's bullshit that you were moved to a mental institution but I'm gonna get you out of here and you're gonna stay with me at my Nana's place. Imani is getting the hell out and you can have her room. Both of us are gonna get back on our feet and keep moving along with life, aight?" I nodded my head. "Nah, I wanna hear you agree."

"Alright CJ, I agree with you. Thank you so much." Kissing his cheek and then wrapping my arms around his neck. "When do you plan on taking me home- if they let you?"

"Today. They're gonna let me because you don't belong here. There's nothing wrong with you that should suggest you remain here to get their help. You have me who will have no problem putting a foot up your ass if you do anything you know you shouldn't."

"And it already begins, alright CJ. Have fun talking to staff about taking me out of here, I need to get Joy back to her Mother's room, so if you excuse me." Peeling away from him and feeling the cold air rush up against me to fill the spot where he just was brought up the memory of the last time we hugged in the court room.

I'm surprised he's already out though. Wasn't he supposed to serve at least two years? I had heard so many rumors from kids that managed to learn about CJ's trial. From he's going to be put on Death Row to he has to serve twenty five years then be on parole. Not one of them I believed but it was unsettling to see what the imaginations of outsiders could come up with.