Whatever It Takes

Breathe

Whatever It Takes

8

Lauren

Camz is back, and I don't really know what to feel about it. But right now, I'm really glad she is. I need to breathe.

"You can go home and nap, Lo. I got Luna." She said as I shook my head.

"No. You're not responsible of taking care of her." I sighed as I massaged my temples. I've had this headache for days now, not being able to sleep, or nap. It was exhausting. Luna's on her round of Chemo, so she's been feeling bad for the past couple of days. I hate seeing my baby girl like this.

"Lauren, just please go. You're tiring yourself. Scaring your daughter. So please just rest." She said as she was calming down my own daughter.

"I'll just stay here." I said as Camila shook her head.

"You need a shower and an undisturbed nap. So please Lo. I can handle Luna." She said as I sighed. She's giving a good bargain, actually, and even though I really have to be with my daughter, I need to do this for myself.

"Will you call if something happens?" I asked Camila as she smiled to me. "You have my number, the house number and stuff right?" I asked her as she just giggled.

"Lauren, yes. Go on. Enjoy your afternoon. I'll call you, if I need you." She smiled at me again as I nodded my head. My daughter has already calmed down, but she's still sniffling. I grabbed my purse as I walked closer to them.

"Baby, Mommy's leaving." I said as Luna was moving away from me, burying her face into Camila's neck. "Oh." She's scared of me.

"I got her." Camila smiled at me sadly as I just nodded my head and walking out of the room.

---

I woke up, and it was already dark out. Fuck. I slept for 7 hours. It's already 10 pm.

"Camz!" I screamed on the phone as soon as I heard Camila's sleepy Hello on the other line.

"Lo. It's late. And Luna just fell asleep. Just come in tomorrow okay." She whined as she hung up. The hell? What am I supposed to do at this hour?

I grabbed myself some pop tarts in the cupboard. Nat fills up the apartment with food which I don't really get to eat, until now.

I plopped down the couch, really not knowing what to do with myself. I grabbed the laptop in front of me, not knowing what to do with it. The only movies I have in here are Luna's movies, and other than that, a fast internet service Nat keeps bragging. Twitter was the first thing I typed, and it was not really good idea. Then instagram came about, which was the worst idea I did. I wanted to know how my friends have been, and where they are actually, and I guess it was really therapeutic to get a glimpse of their lives. I mean, 3 years was a long time, and I spent 3 years in the shadows. They spent 3 years continuing what they were destined to do.

Alexa was doing well. She was still in Puerto Rico, going on parties with her new friends. I wonder if she was there when I visited Miami?

Keana's modeling and acting gigs have escalated really well. It's amazing how her dreams are finally coming true. Her last show was in Paris. Good job, Keeks.

Lucy. Oh Lucia. It's good to see her face. She tweets seldomly, so I checked her instagram page. She's been to Miami, New Orleans and Columbia, jumping from one place to another. She still in search for her real purpose in this world, something that would keep give meaning to the days she has in this world. I always thought about her, knowing her trust issues on new people strains her purpose on getting new friends. She values her long friendships, and me leaving probably sent her to the edge. Her last tweet was haunting, pretty dark. I want to reach out to her. I miss her so much.