Guy 1: "sit on my lap"
Guy 2: "no"
Guy 1: "sit on my face then"
Guy 2: "I haven't showered in 3 days"
Guy 1: "even better"
***
"no she's like 24 in vampire years"
***
"You made out with someone for 10 minutes"
"It was like 2 seconds"
"No it was 10 whole ass minutes"
***
"Howl!"
"Woof!"
*repeat for 30 minutes*
***
"43 fucking dollars? Fuck that I need money for hookers"
***
"Miss can we all dip class today?"
"Yes"
