Lost Hope Isn't What I'm Worried About

What Was He Supposed to Do Now?

When Sam awoke, it was with a rough cough that dragged pain through his chest and throat and pulled a groan from in between his lips, his ears throbbing from after effects of the noise. He tried to sit up, but he felt warm hands shove his chest back down, and a faint voice reached his ears.

"Sam, what the hell happened?" He heard a voice say, and he forced his eyes open, the darkness reaching around them and blanketing everything like a black cloud. It took a moment for his eyes to focus, but when they did, his roommate's face slowly faded into view.

"Gabriel," Sam groaned out, rolling his head to the side as pain shot from his scalp to his back. His gaze found the broken window, staring out into the blackness into a momentary shock before grabbing his roommate's arm, clutching tightly.

"M-my brother," Sam said, his mind feeling a little loopy and unfocused and he prayed that he didn't have a concussion, "I need my brother."

"Okay, man. Just...just stay there," His roommate said, looking frightened as he ran off. It didn't take Sam long to know that the boy would probably go get the college security first and forced himself into a sitting position, taking a deep breath before edging himself to his feet, swaying as he stumbled to his desk where his phone lay.

Grabbing it and dialing Dean's phone, he swore when his brother didn't answer. He used the wall as a support as he made his way out of the room, glancing back and forth down the hallway before struggling down the hallway to the exit. He had to hurry before his roommate got back, or he would be faced with a lot of questions he didn't know the answer to.

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Sam was soaked by the time that he reached Dean and Castiel's dorm building. Well, it was more of an apartment-style dorm than anything, on the outskirts of the campus. Still, Sam was shivering and the hallways were only colder with the air conditioning than outside as he stood in front of Dean's door, giving it a knock and huddling closer to himself for warmth.

The door opened, and it was opened by a tired looking Dean. Still, his eyes lit up immediately in worry, and his lips twisted into a frown as he grabbed Sam's crossed arm gently, pulling him in and shutting the door behind him.

"Sam? What happened? Why are you crying?" Dean asked, and Sam didn't even realize he was sobbing until it racked his throat and made his head hurt even more. Still, he shook his head, his shivering growing more and more pronounced.

"Gabriel...Gabriel was taken," Sam said, flinching as a strong throb shot through his head. Dean helped him to a seat, his frown deepening as he hovered near Sam protectively.

"Taken?" Dean echoed, and Sam gave a soft nod, his lip quivering as he furrowed his brows, trying to piece together what actually happened.

"There was a noise...a screech, and then a bright light went off and I was thrown across the room. When the light disappeared, Gabriel was gone," Sam explained, pressing the heel of his palm into his forehead in an attempt to release some of the pain that was pushing against his skull.

Dean was silent for a moment before he let out a 'hmph,' disappearing into the other room. Sam watched him go, listening to the voice of Castiel that joined Dean's a moment later. It was clear the man was sick, even noticeable over the sound of panic and worry that threaded the intelligble words. When Dean came back, he had Castiel beside him, his arm slung around Dean's shoulder to help him remain standing.

"I have somewhere we can go for information."

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Despite Sam's worry for going to someone's house in the middle of the night, he found Castiel to be right as always as a man opened the door, not even seeming surprised as he saw the trio standing on his doorstep into the rain. He only gave them a sad smile, stepping to the side and allowing them to come into the warm house, leading them to a couch in the next room.

"Castiel, what brings you and the Winchesters to my doorstep?" The man asked, sitting at the chair across from the couch with a knowing look in his eyes that unnerved Sam. Castiel didn't answer at first, coughing up a fit as soon as he sat down, and making Dean's brows furrow in worry until he finally finished.

"Father, what happened to Gabriel?" Castiel managed to finally get out, and Sam froze, his eyes turning to the man in shock as he looked him over. This man was...?

The man let out a sad sigh, rubbing at the back of his neck with regret clear in his eyes, "Gabriel has made many enemies in his time of living. It was only a hundred years after Lucifer fell did he go into hiding, faking his death and living under the pretense of being Loki ever since," The man paused, his eyes flickering between the three of them, "It is no surprise when he announced his presence to the world that some of those enemies would attempt to do him harm."

"Wait," Sam interjected, his eyes narrowing in confusion, "What do you mean announce his presence?"

The man arched a brow, scratching at his beard, "Did you not feel it when you two did the ritual? An archangel can use their grace in any ritual to increase its power tenfold. Not only would he have summoned an angel, he would have summoned it in holy chains," He explained, frowning as he furrowed his brows, leaning on his knees.

Sam frowned, his lips pressing into a thin line. He didn't even have an idea what to say to that.

Yet, there was the suddenly small voice of Castiel beside him, and he heard his own heart break with the words, "So, it's my fault that Gabriel is gone?" Castiel whispered, and when Sam looked over, tears were welling in his eyes as Dean hugged him close, shushing him softly as he began coughing again.

The look on the man's face said it all, but Dean had a look of annoyance cross his face as he turned his gaze to him, "Then do you know who, or what, took him?" Dean asked, making Sam turn his focus back to the man. If he was God, surely he would-

"I cannot tell you," The man said, his voice firm. Sam stared for a moment in shock before his blood began to boil and he growled under his breath, glaring at the man.

"Why the hell not?" Sam spat, and although Castiel let out a warning, the man only met his gaze, tears welling in his own eyes and spilling down his cheeks.

"I wish I could. I want to help Gabriel just as much as you do. He is my beloved son, but his destiny has been set since the dawn of time," The man replied, his voice soft as he wiped at the tears that stained his cheeks. Sam felt his anger falter, being replaced with desperation.

"And?" Sam pushed a little further, that desperation leaking into his voice.

"I will not instill you with the false hope that he could be saved."