Moving On Is Hard [Trilogy]

Acceptance

No editing. Good Luck. Enjoy!!

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::Tiana::

I watched as everything went down, and panicked. I know I should’ve fought for my life, but after going through so much hell in life, I knew that in a few more months, I would’ve been going through it again, I was just tired of everything, it’s time I have my shot at being at peace for once. Layla and I were getting ready to crossover until we saw a shadowy figure in the distance. “That’s daddy” Layla whispered. Apparently he heard her because he looked up. I was nervous, and developed butterflies in my stomach. “We can talk to him, but it’s not his time yet” Layla informed me as she lead me over to where Issa stood. He looked great in all white, he should do it more often. “Tiana???” he asked confused. I nodded shyly afraid of what he might say. “Am I dead???” he asked. “No” I responded softly. “Where am I???” he asked just as confused as I was. “The place where Heaven and Earth meets” I explained. He nodded before speaking “Who’s that” he pointed at Layla. “Our daughter” I told him with a smile, as she held my leg. “That’s not possible, that’s not how old she would’ve been if she had been born” he explained. “I know, I haven’t figured that out either, but she looks like us, so she’s definitely ours.” After I said that, Issa started to disappear, and tears slowly slipped down my cheek, because I knew he was going back to life. “What’s going on???” he asked shakily. I stepped to him and kissed his cheek. “You’re waking up, see you when it’s time. I love you.” I said as Layla hugged his leg. “I love you daddy” she said as she let go, and walked back towards me. “I love both of you” he managed to get out before he completely disappeared. I picked Layla up, and noticed she was crying too. “He’s not gonna remember this” she said between sobs. “It’s ok, you can still watch over him” I said kissing her head, and turned to walk back to the light, but it was gone. “Where’d it go???” I asked more to myself than Layla, but she answered anyway. “Daddy’s still on Earth, and we have to watch over him from here” she explained. “But we saw the light, before he appeared.” “No, we saw daddy’s light. You still have something to do, before we go into the light, and I can’t go until you do.” I had only assumed we were crossing over, since we were heading towards a light, I never did pay attention to the fact that it had completely disappeared once Issa came into view. I wonder what unfinished business I have though????

::Issa::

I had awaken to bright lights, and a hospital smell. What the hell is going on, and why am I at the hospital???? I coughed a little, and my head started pounding. I groaned, and gripped my head. “My baby!” I head ma dukes yell, and that only worsened the pounding in my head, so I pulled a pillow over my head. “Please stop yelling” I murmured into the pillow. “I’m sorry, I’m just glad you’re alive, I don’t know what I’d do if I had lost you” she said soothingly. I removed the pillow from my face. “What happened???” I asked carefully. “You passed out and hit your head on the floor. You’ve been out for 2 weeks” she explained. “Why did I pass out???” I couldn’t remember anything that happened after I’d arrived to the hospital to check on the status of Tiana after she was shot, I hope she’s ok, “And where’s Tiana???” I finished. All I saw were tears streaming down my mother’s face, I knew it wasn’t good news. “That’s the reason you passed out” she said and then inhaled deeply before she proceeded, “Issa, Tiana passed away 2 weeks ago” she said sympathetically as tears escaped both our eyes. I focused my attention on the ceiling, I couldn’t bear to look at my mother’s crying face any longer, that would’ve only broken me down even more. “When do I get out of here???” I asked with less tears falling. “I’ll go get the doctor and find out” she said, I nodded, and then heard my hospital room door open and close. I really can’t believe this, not only is she gone, but I’ve missed the opportunity to say my final goodbye to her, the day I leave here, my life is gonna change. I’m pretty sure Isa is gonna be staying with Ricki now, and right now that’s probably a good thing, I don’t think I’ll be stable enough to take care of myself, let alone my daughter, but I’ll be sure to send her whatever she needs and talk to her as much as possible. Shortly after drifting into my thoughts, a doctor and nurse walked in with my mama. The nurse examined the machines or something, and the doctor spoke. “How are you feeling, Mr. Thompson” he asked me. “My head hurts” I said still focused on the ceiling. “I’ll be sure to send a nurse in here with some medication for that. Just get some rest” he explained. “When am I leaving???” I asked annoyed by his presence. “We’ll going to run a few more tests, but at max you’ll be in here for up to 48 hours, at minimum 4-5 hours” he said writing some stuff on a clipboard. Then the nurse started bothering me, and I was really getting annoyed. Can they just leave already, and let me outta here???? I’m guessing ma dukes was able to read my facial expression, and was able to tell I was becoming highly annoyed, because she spoke up. “Are you coming with me, or do I need to drop you off at home??” she asked, as I heard the door being opened and closed again. “Doesn’t even matter” I said trying to hide the annoyance in my voice. “Hey Issa” I heard Taina’s voice. “How you feeling bruh???” I heard Que’s voice ask, I guess those are the two who walked in. Right before I answered the doctor said something, I wasn’t paying attention to, and he and the nurse left. “Hey, and I feel annoyed, and my head hurts” I explained truthfully. “Oh, well I took your car back to your house, and left the keys in the kitchen” Taina informed me. “Thanks” I barely responded “How you holding up???” I asked her, remembering how poorly she reacted to Tiana’s kidnapping. “I’m taking it one day at a time, it’s hard, but I’m not as bad as I was when she was kidnapped” she answered after exhaling deeply. “Why????” I asked shocked, finally looking at her. “What you mean???” she asked confusedly. “When she was kidnapped, you were to kill everybody. Now that she’s no longer here, you’re somewhat ok with it???? That’s strange.” “I know, but when we raided Quan’s house, a notebook in her handwriting was found, and she wrote something to all of us, don’t you remember???” she asked. “No, what did she write???” I asked anxious, and Taina pulled a notebook from her purse, and went through a few pages before handing it to me. I read where I saw the mentioning of my name:

“Issa: if you read Tai’s part, you’re probably anxious to know what’s going on. Remember when we were trying to figure out why I was sleeping so much, and all of that? Hope so, anyway I was pregnant, and later miscarried due to the fights and stress brought on by Quan. I only know because I’ve had multiple dreams about her, she looks like a cross between the two of us, and had our trademark eyes. If you’ve had the dreams, you were probably just as confused as I was, so now you know. Anyway, I wanted to tell you on our Australia trip, but I can tell you now. I love you so much, despite everything we’ve gone through, you showed me that it was ok for me to be in a relationship again, and not all guys were the same. You stayed with me after you found out about everything from my past, and I couldn’t be more appreciative of that. I hope you know none of this was your fault, I’m the one who played a lot, and I should have remembered my past, and known that something bad was bound to happen to me again. But you also taught me to stop looking at the past, and focus on achieving my goals, so thank you for that. I miss you, and I hate the fact I never got the chance to meet your daughter, I’m sure she’s gorgeous (I mean, look at her dad). Whatever happens to me, don’t let it affect how you feel towards everybody around you, especially your daughter, keep a positive attitude and mindset. If you feel any negative energy, you need to go with Tai and get some help at some point (I’m dead ass serious). Miss you!”

As soon as I stopped reading, I felt the tears, I can’t believe I would’ve had another daughter. It does explain the dreams of the photo of the little girl I was having. She’s right though, I can’t push everybody away like I did when she was taken. I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to help it though, so I might have to go get help at some point for real. “You can keep that one, she wrote in two different notebooks, we didn’t find the other one until later” Taina told me. “Thank you” I told her. “No problem, I hope it helps you, as much as it did me.” I nodded with a small smile for the first time since I’ve opened my eyes. Maybe there’s hope for me after all. The doctor walked back in shortly after, if he’s bringing bad news, he might as well turn and walk back out of here. “Good news, we’re almost finished running your tests, so you should be out of here today. I also brought you something for that headache, but should eat first” he told me as he sat the pill cup on the tray thingy. My mama thanked him for everything, and he walked out. I reached over and uncovered the plate, the food looked absolutely disgusting, there is no way in hell I’m eating that. “I figured you’d have that reaction, so I sent Que to get you something” ma dukes said, and Que picked up a bag with a styrofoam box inside, and brought it over to me. Behold the wings! “Thanks. How you holding up since you lost ya best friend?” I asked him as I bit into a fry. “Better than the two of you” he said pointing at me and Taina. I chuckled “I thought Tai was doing good?” I inquired as I bit into a wing, damn this is heaven! “She is, but she still has her days, and I had grown closer to Taina, than I had Tiana, although she was my best friend, I miss her, but I haven’t had my break down just yet” he explained. “That and she joked with him in her ‘letter’ to him” Taina said, and Que nodded in agreement. “Cool, how did yall know I was gonna wake up though???” I asked referring to the fact that I was brought food. “Every day they brought in a different set of meals in hopes that you would wake up, and I would always check to see what it was, and knowing how picky you are, I knew you wouldn’t have wanted it. Right after I left out of here to talk to the doctor today, Taina called and said they were on the way, and I told them you were up, and to bring you something to eat back” ma dukes explained. “Thanks” I said and continued to eat “When I get out of here can I go to her burial site?” I asked cautiously. “Yeah, I’ll take you after you get home, and change or whatever” Taina offered. “Alright, thanks” “No problem.” “Who paid for her funeral??” I asked. “Mine and her parents chipped in, why???” Taina asked. “She has a bank account, and in the savings is all the money Tiny sent her over the years from their deal” I explained remembering that info. “They had no problem with that, but with her money we could open up some type of help center for anybody who’s being abused” Taina suggested, “Tiny came to the funeral to pay her respects, and said if there was anything we needed we could call her, and she gave me her number, so I’ll be sure to let her know what we’re doing with the money” she continued to explain. “That’s not a bad idea, so ok” I told her. We continued to talk, and I continued to eat. The doctor came back a few hours later to let me know I could sign out and go home, I was more than ready to get the hell outta there. Life without Tiana, here I come.

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