Chapter 2

6.4K 196 648
                                    

Screaming.

Blood.

Pleading.

Blood.

Gun.

Bullet.

Blood.

Shot.

Scream.

Silence.

Blood.

Bucky's eyes flew open and  he breathed deeply, trying to slow his heart rate. 

He had shifted in the night so he was on the edge of the bed, and as he slowly sat up he glanced at the clock.

Of course. 4:27am. Like every night. Bucky thought darkly. 

Every single night since he had escaped hydra, he had a nightmare at exactly 4:27am. At least, every single night he slept. 

He slipped though the silent and dark bedroom like a shadow till he got to the bathroom door, where he opened it, locked it and then flicked the light on. 

Blinking in the sudden light he clumsily, yet still silently, made his way over to where his clothes from before lay, discarded and dirty. 

He reached into the pocket of his pants and came out with a blade, roughly and inch long, and slightly bloody. 

He took off the pyjama trousers Steve had lent him, and with a hiss of pain, began dragging the blade across his thighs.


Murderer.

Deeper.

Monster.

Deeper.

Steve doesn't want you.

Deeper.

You deserve this.

Deeper.

Hundreds of bodies.

Deeper.

All because of you.

Deeper.

Can you get their blood of your hands?

Deeper.

You're nothing but a monster.

Deeper.

You are the winter solider, and nothing else.


With a muffled sob, Bucky grabbed an antiseptic wipe from the first aid kit under the sink, and cleaned the many cuts, hissing as it stung. 

Grabbing some gauze and medical tape he quickly bandaged the cuts and pulled the trousers back up. He gave the blade a quick rinse and, using the lighter he had in his old uniform, burned the gauze wrappers. 

He flicked the light off, waited a couple seconds before his eyes adjusted back to the darkness  and then  left the bathroom, closing the door behind him. 

A quick glance at the clock showed that it was now 5am and Bucky deemed it pointless to go back to bed now. 

Suddenly Steve's alarm clock went off. Bucky jumped and then doubled over laughing as Steve got out of bed and desperately tried to turn down his alarm, which was the song "Single Ladies" by Beyoncé. 


"Shut up jerk, Tony must have changed it."

"Sure, punk." Bucky replied sarcastically.

"He did! And beside what were you doing out of bed?! You should be resting." Steve reached for Bucky to pull him back into the bed and Bucky growled and backed away swiftly, eyes wide and darting everywhere. 

He saw a hurt look come into Steve's gorgeous blue eyes and hastily began apologizing, tripping over his words.

"I'm sorry Stevie! I really am! But I just.... I just ...... I haven't felt a friendly human touch in 70 years... and I'm still... Still...."'He trailed off and carefully approached Steve and sat down next to him. 

Steve very carefully and slowly snaked his arm around Bucky's waist. He tensed at first, breathing shallowly, but slowly relaxed into Steve and the bed.


"Why do you get up so early?" Bucky asked after a few minutes of silence, apart from their breathing.

"I run every morning."

"At 5?!" Bucky exclaimed.

"The cold motivates me. Speaking of which, I should get going, supposed to meet Sam in 5 minutes." Steve shot up and changed (Bucky looked away) brushed his teeth, did hair, and he we out the door before you could say "allons-y!"

Bucky yawned and stood up. He wandered into the kitchen and opened the fridge. He hates hydra, of course, but he was damn glad they kept him updated on what was happening technology wise in the world, other wise he would starve to death. 

He quickly grabbed a recipe book from the shelf and flipped though it until he found a bacon, spinach and egg white omelette. Perfect, iron will help with the blood loss! But what the hell is bacon? He opened the fridge agin and grabbed the eggs, spinach and a package of "bacon." 

Whatever the hell it was. He decided to add some onions too, and got to work, chopping and mixing and cooking. 

When Steve got back 45 minutes later the kitchen was just as he had left it, except for Bucky holding out a steaming omelette.

"Did you make this?" Steve asked, eyes wide with shock. Bucky nodded shyly, looking down and shifting from foot to foot.

"Thanks Buck!"

Bucky smiled and began eating his omelet. Steve sat down beside him and flicked the T.V on.

"When are you going to tell the others about me?" Bucky muttered in a hushed tone.

"Tomorrow?" Steve offered up.

"Ok." Bucky nodded and turned his attention back to Sherlock and pointing out all the obvious johnlock moments, which Steve happily helped with.

<><><><><><><><><>

Chapter 2! Ta-da? It hurst to speak cause I got hit in the throat by a dodgeball thrown by a friggin' grade 12.  Whoop-de-dang-do. Any way hope you enjoyed! Bye my silver nuggets 👋🏻

4:27amWhere stories live. Discover now