STOCKHOLM ➵ tomlinson

twenty two

FINALLY A NORMAL CHAPTER AHH!! i said id promise a chapter up but it was an Instagram post so here we are!! how's everyone today? :)

JOSEPHINE
sunday, five days after

Louis scoffs and sits back up before saying, "What now, you fu--"

"Calm down, you little weasel," Mikey snaps. "Calder's asking for you again."

"Again? This is the fifth-- oh forget it!
I'll be right there."

He stands up, and gently pats my thigh as he leaves. Before he closes the door behind him, he looks at me and gives me a small smile. And then, he was gone.

My heart sinks and I fall face first into the pillow. I don't even know who he is; how have I gotten myself so deep? I don't know his past, or his future goals. I don't even know what he is doing right now.

In the corner of my red eye, I see an iPhone charger. I thank the gods that it works for my phone and I plug in my phone that's been dead for nearly a week.

I shut my eyes and lay down on the soft rose mattress. The feeling of peace envelops me, and gives me a tight hug. It kisses me with slumber as I fade away into the late AM.

Twenty minutes later, my phone buzzes obnoxiously. The cell wakes me up with hundreds of texts and calls. I read and scan them all with a heavy heart. I feel loved for once.

Yet, all I could think about was that people care when it's too late. Where were all of these people when I was with them? Where were these compassionate souls when I sat alone in the freezing musty bathrooms at school? Where had my boyfriend been when my brother abandoned me at a party I never wanted to go to?

Instead of smashing my phone to pieces like I want to, I open Instagram.

too late

josephine_horan: don't bother. im fine without everybody. im 18.

I click send without hesitation. None of it mattered to me anymore. I have him. And he was all I needed. I delete all the messages, voicemails, and block everybody in my contacts.

When I finished, the cellphone rested on the rusty oak drawer beside the bed. My eyelids cover my eyeballs like a fresh sheet of snow over the hills. I could wander off into the land of sheep, sweet and sound.

//

My phone flashes 4:17 AM when an abrupt noise wakes me up again. This time, it sounds like people.

I tiptoe to the door and quietly open the door to hear kissing. A woman and a man slam against the wall. It's hard for me to see without light on, and I have decent vision. My face flushes as I realize they begin to take off their clothes.

I feel obliged to look away but the hair makes me worried. The man doesn't have blonde or black hair, ruling out Calum and Luke. The girl's brown waves are messy from the makeout and worry it leads further.

My heart drops to my stomach. Cold blue eyes look into her chestnut ones. I quickly turn away and shut the door without a noise. I jump under the covers and stuff my ears before more sound enters them.

How could I have been so stupid?

I had him. And he is all I need. But he isn't mine.