Blue

Drunk Dialing

Harry's POV

          " Its the fact that you used her to make me jealous, to purposely hurt me." The words continue to haunt me as I drive. They keep replaying over and over in my head and each time they do, my knuckles turn white from my grip on the steering wheel. I don't think I can hold on any tighter at this point.
            Purposely hurt her? That was not my intention at all. I took it too far and now I hurt her, I promised myself I wouldn't hurt her ever again. Goddammit Harry, why do you have to keep fucking up with this girl? Why can't you get your shit together for once? She's the girl of your dreams and your about to lose it all because you let your jealously get in the way?
            I find myself pulling into the nearest bar parking lot and lock my car doors as I get out. 8 months sober is ending right now. I need a drink. I said I wouldn't drink ever again, but fuck it. I swing the bar doors open and am relieved when I realize the bar is empty. I can drink down my sadness all I want in peace. I sit down on a bar stool and a bartender comes out.
           " Double shot of vodka." I say. He nods, not even asking for an ID. Works for me. He hands me a shot glass of vodka and I take it down. The familiar burn arrives in my throat, but I ignore it. It eases the pain, which is why I love it.

...
          I've been sitting at this bar for god knows how long and I am very drunk right now. Blue is the only thing on my mind still, but I feel less pain. " Another one." I call out to the bartender, even though he's right in front of me. He looks down at me as he's cleaning a glass. " That's as drunk as I'm letting you get kid, go home." I pound my fist against the counter. "Give me more." I demand. He shakes his head.
           " You have to learn to deal with your problems sometimes and not just drink them away." I huff at his words, even though he's right. " Fuck this." I jump down from the bar stool, which was a mistake because everything goes wobbly. Once my vision is cleared, I storm out of the bar and open my car door. I sit in the hot car for a few seconds as I pull out my phone.
            Its like I can't even control my hands. My vision is blurry, so I can barely see the phone screen. I hear a ring and notice I'm dialing a number. I just shrug it off and put my phone to my ear. It's probably my mom, so what's the worst that can happen?
            The ringing stops and I hear breathing on the other line. " What do you want Harry?" My eyes widened and my heart speeds up at the sound of her voice. Blue. She sounds so unpleased to hear my voice. Like she did earlier. The way she just gave up on our argument, the way she said I purposely hurt her.
             What am I supposed to say? She'll never understand how guilty I feel for flirting with Madison. She'll never understand the burning sensation I got when she said those words to me. She never will, no one ever will. " I'm sorry." Fuck, why do I have to be an honest drunk? I hear her sigh on the other end.
             " Harry, are you drunk?" Her tone sounds concerned, and a flash of relief washes over me. " Yes." Fuck. She sighs again for the 50th time during this 30 second phone call.
" Where are you?" I lean forward to look at the sign to the shitty bar.
         " Lorenzo's Bar." I slur. No wonder she knows I'm drunk. " Don't move, I'm on my way."She replies and she hangs up the phone before I can protest.I rest my head against the wheel and sigh. I hit the wheel and the horn goes off. " Why can't you just be normal?" I ask myself. " Why can't you just fucking be normal, why can't you just be good for her!" I yell out to myself. I close my eyes and try to relax, despite the alcohol running through my veins. I finally do relax and find myself dozing off into darkness.
            My head shoots up to the sounding of something knocking. I look around for a minute, vision too blurry to find the noise. I look to my left to see Blue knocking on the window and all the guilt rushes back to me. I roll down the window and fresh air hits my lungs.
            " How long have you been asleep?" She asks. I look at the clock on the stereo. 11:52 pm it reads, I shrug. " Since we got off the phone." I must've been in a pretty deep sleep because my voice is thick in drowsiness. She nods. " Good, you stayed put and that's all that matters. It took me about 2 hours to get here." I raise my eyebrows in surprise. " I had to sneak out, then I had to get Sophia to drop me off here." I still feel confused, alcohol still buzzing in my veins.
           She rolls her eyes. " Doesn't matter. I'm here now open the door so I can drive." I look up at her, the night lights shining on her. She's so fucking beautiful. I smile a little. " I can drive." She shakes her head and laughs.
" Don't think that's a good idea." I shrug and unlock the doors. She moves out of the way to let me get out and I feel a little dizzy from standing.
          " Here let me help you." She takes my hand and helps walk me to the passenger side. I hesitate to push her off and tell her I'm okay, but I'm holding her hand and I that's a start. She closes my door and then hops in the driver's seat. She starts the car and I try to relax with not driving for once. She starts driving and I close my eyes to keep from getting nauseous.
           " Drink." I open my eyes and see Blue holding a water bottle in front of me. I take it from her and chug it down once its open. Water is just what I needed and I'm starting to feel alot better. We haven't said anything to each other the whole carride. We have to talk about it, so why not now? I'm drunk and vulnerable so this will be easy on her.
          " Why did you do it?" I look over at Blue after she finishes her sentence. " Why, did you try to make me jealous?" I sigh. I really don't know why I used Madison to make her mad. I guess because Madison was just there and I was pissed that Sam and Blue talked. " I.. I don't know Blue." Silence once again takes over the car. " He's completely harmless, just want you to know that. There's no reason to be jealous of Sam."
           " I have every reason to be pissed." Anger starts to run through my veins. Oh no. " Tell me, tell me why you don't want me to talk to him? Tell me why you feel so threatened by him?" I take a deep breath. Fuck me for still being drunk.
          " He made you red Blue. He made you fucking blush." She rolls her eyes in annoyance. " Harry, everything makes me blush, its nothing personal geez." I pound my fist against the arm rest.
         " No one makes my girl fucking red!" The sound startles her and she jumps a little. The car comes to a halt and she looks over at me.
            She looks scared as fuck, I fucking scared her. Can this get any worst, this small argument is getting the best of me. I sigh. " Blue," I slowly reach over and unbuckle her seatbelt. I pick her up and put her on my lap.
" Don't be scared, I didn't mean to scare you." She puts her forehead against mine and breathes. " Tell me."
Her cinnamon scent lingers into my nostrils.
           " I don't want to lose you to him." I spill. She looks down at me a little shocked, but continues to listen.
" I see the way he looks at you and you don't notice it, but I do. He looks at you they way only I want to look at you. I don't want him to take you away from me. I don't want him to make you blush, to make you laugh, to kiss you, to touch you. I want to do that and I want to be the only one." I stroke her hair and she closes her eyes.
        " Harry, your the only one I want, I promise you that." Her words make me feel alot better. " Do you still like me?" I ask. Fuck, I'm falling in love with this girl all over again. I didn't think that was possible. " Of course I still like you." She massages my hair. " I was being a dick earlier. I won't ever do that again. I promise." She's soften up alot since when she first got here.
           " Don't ever leave me Blue." I say. Oh my fuck, if this alcohol doesn't shut the fuck up. " I promise I won't." Fuck why am I so in love with this girl? I hold onto her, not kissing her, looking at her, just holding her. Both of us in silence, praying I start to sober up. Her hand continues to massage my curls and I relax more.
        " Harry?" I look up at her." Yeah?" She looks down at me. " Why are you drunk?" I sigh and shake my head. She nods in understanding as she continues to play with my hair. Thank god the alcohol didn't open my mouth about that.

This chapter was so bad, but vote and comment if you enjoyed :p