My hearts become too cold to break .::ELY::.

If You Only Knew

When I wake up in the morning I'm in the same position I fell asleep in only now Eugene is as equally curled up around me, still soundlessly asleep. How does he not make a noise when he sleeps?
"Good morning," Eugene says just kidding he wasn't sleeping.
"Where you watching me sleep?" I ask.
"Maybe, it's the happiest I've seen you in months though," he says," sorry that's still creepy,"
I laugh,"it's okay, let's get ready for work,"
I attempt to sit up but Eugene just groans and holds me down.
"It's like four in the morning, and I'm not going to the gym, we sleep in on these days go back to sleep, we don't have to be at work until eight," Eugene says.
I smile and cuddle my way back into his chest, dating Eugene really wouldn't be that bad, if this is how we would spend our mornings.
Eugene pulls the blanket up to his chin, which is over my head, and laughs when I uncover my face.
"If you really want to get up, we can but I'd prefer to stay in and sleep for a few hours," he says I rest my head on his chest,"sleep it is"
He tightens his arms around me again, and I swear within minutes he's asleep again; and I'm alone with my thoughts.

By the time the alarm goes off at six I've thought myself into a bad mood, not really angry, more of a depressed mood.
"Good morning again." Eugene says before he gets out of his bed,"you can have the shower first and I'll take out the dogs,"
"You don't have to do that," I say sitting up.
"This again Beau?" He sighs,"just stop please you don't have to be like this, go get in the shower, I'm taking the dogs out,"
And with that he leaves the room and I get up and go get in the shower. After getting dressed and ready for work Eugene is just getting back inside after taking all three dogs for a walk probably just around the block. I unclip Freakshow and sit next to him letting him climb in my lap and pretend he's still a puppy, while Eugene goes to shower and get ready for work. I'm not looking forward today, partially because we still have to finish Keith's video, the other part is because I'll have to go home.
Eugene emerges from his bedroom looking the only way I think he knows how to dress, dapper as fuck. He messed with his hair a little in the mirror before turning to me.
"Ready?" He asks  I nod and clip Freakshow back to his leash standing up, today feels like it's going to be hell.
Upon arriving at the office I'm ditched for the other three try guys. So Freakshow and I make our way to my desk and work on various projects until Keith comes to get us.
"So you went on a Romantic date, we'll just cut right to the chase, I'm going to hand you both these cards one means you wouldn't mind out again and the other we're better as just friends, alright now I'm going to turn you away from each other and put the card you most agree with on the bottom so it's facing is when you turn around." Keith says as we turn always from each other. Keith counts down from three and I put the blue card in front, there's already no way that Eugene is single or that he'd be interested in me anyway.
On one we turn around Eugene picked the red card, which means he'd want to go out with me again.
"Why'd you chose the red card?" Keith asks.
"We already, basically act as if we're dating. And it was a good date, I had fun, I'd do it again" Eugene says
"Why'd you pick the blue card?" Keith asks me.
"Realistically?" I ask and he nods,"because Eugene is out of my league, he's out of  most of the populations league, he's too smart, too polite, too kind, I have not met a single person that is worthy of the kind of love Eugene has to offer, do you know what we did for our date?" Keith shakes his head he hasn't seen the footage yet," we went stargazing  and had a picnic on the beach, the date I described in a video a year ago, nowadays Nobody puts that much thought into a date, and he did that while we were  fighting, further proof that nobody deserves Eugene"
Eugene just stares at me until we finish the video,
"You don't actually think that do you?" Eugene asks stopping me at the door.
"Yes I do," I say.
"Well you're wrong, just know that you're wrong, I won't explain because you wouldn't listen either way, thanks for the confidence boots, that I'm doing something right, but you're wrong, I know one person who deserves to be treated like a queen, but has only been treated like a jester, by fools who couldn't appreciate her, took her for granted, and tore her apart; and I've watched her piece herself back together after each one, and each time I watched her get a little colder, little less trusting, and  her view of her self worth dwindling to nothing, as she lets them treat her less than," he says,"and you know as well as I do, if not better,"
And with that Eugene makes his exit and Keith walks over.
"Mic drop," Keith says before following Eugene. I make my way back to my desk where Freakshow greets me and I arrange for and über to pick me up for lunch to take me back to my place so I can bring Freakshow home, but that's not for at least another hour. While I'm killing time by surfing the internet Zach makes his first appearance of the day.
"What are you going to do about Eugene?" He asks sitting in the empty chair next to me.
"What do you mean?" I ask not looking at him.
"He obviously likes you, what are you going to do about it?" He says
And despite the fact that I've been daydreaming about what it would be like to be Eugene's girl friend all day I say," I'll kindly escort him back to the friend zone where he belongs,"
Zach rolls his eyes,"just give him a chance at least, he might just be what you've been looking for, he could be your flame twin,"
"But why take that chance and ruin a friendship?" I ask,"why risk getting hurt again, only worse because I'd still have to see him everyday, and I would lose a friend of it didn't work out,"
"Because you could find happiness, and a whole lot of love that you've been missing out on. He can very clearly see that you're something special, I don't think Eugene would take you for granted or mistreat you like the others have, I think you two could really go the distance," he says,"promise me you'll consider it?"
I sigh,"I promise I'll consider it"
And with that Zach disappears, and it's time to take Freakshow home. All the while thoughts of how amazing my life could be with Eugene dance around doing nothing but make me feel like I don't deserve him even more.