Chapter 5

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I pushed open the bedroom door and Dimitri stalked in behind me. He looked around, confused by his surroundings. 'What is it, Comrade?' I asked as I rummaged through my bare wardrobe.

'It just looks different.' He stated simply. He looked around and after a few seconds collapsed onto the chair in the corner of the small room. 

'Wait one second.' I held up a finger before rushing into the corridor and upstairs to the bathroom so I could get changed into something decent and in no time I was sprinting back into my room to see Dimitri reading a western novel on the same chair he had been sitting on when I left. 

'Where did you find that? It's not mine.' I asked. He pointed to a crack in the wall that had now been moved to reveal a hole. 

'I had to find places to put things. My friend kept on stealing my books.' I laughed at the seriousness on Dimitri's face as he said it. He raised his head from his book and looked me directly in the eye. 'I should probably go.' I nodded but realised there was something else.

'You need to get back to Lissa but thanks for bringing me here and hope you like what I've done with your room. Also,' I handed him a piece of paper with the address of the coffee shop I go to daily 'if you ever want to talk, or just meet, I'll probably be there.' I smiled as he got up and walked out into the corridor. We waved before he disappeared and left me to sit on my bed, he was the only thing on my mind. It shouldn't be like this, he was seven years older than me. It was illegal for a start, just feeling this for him was against society's rules. I sighed and rummaged through my wardrobe again. Dimitri wasn't the only one to have a place to hide things. Mine was different, though, mine didn't hide books but instead the booze.

I put the small bottle of vodka in my bedside drawer and lay on my bed waiting for the evening to come and the drinking games would start- alone. This was different to normal. Normally this was to forget my parents, the incident, now it was to forget him. The man I could never have. I had only been with him for a couple of hours and he was the first to make me laugh, smile, make witty comments and most of all- feel alive.

I lay on my bed for hours and as I heard Sam calling for people to come for dinner, I knew it was late enough. I locked my door with the make-shift lock I had made and took out the bottle of vodka and downed as much as I could in one. It burned but not as much as the heartache I felt. I took shot after shot until I could hardly feel my body. 

I stumbled out of my room and through the corridors and soon I was out on the streets stumbling to the one place I knew I shouldn't go: the bar. Dimitri probably wasn't working there, said my muddled mind that had lost all logic. If I was sober, I would have realised that Dimitri probably worked most nights in the bar but drunk- my mind didn't even register the chance.

It took me a lot longer than normal to reach the warehouse and the bouncer let me stumble straight in, they didn't seem bothered by the state I was in. I almost fell down the stairs but a pair of strong arms caught me. 'Oh God, I'm so sorry.' He stammered. I looked up and realised just who it was. Even in this drunk state, I would never forget those eyes. The eyes that I was falling in love with.

'Dimitri.' I slurred, unable to make the words come out properly.

'Oh, Roza.' The nickname sent shivers down my spine but not before I felt the effects of the vodka on me. Black spots appeared in my vision and I fell into the man I love's arms.

-

I woke up in Dimitri's arms. He was holding me bridal style and hauling me up the stairs to his apartment. 'You're awake.' He stated, not sounding that interested. Well, angry more than anything else.

'I'm sorry.' The vodka still was in my bloodstream and caused me to end up a sobbing mess, still in Dimitri's arms. 'я тоже' He mumbled in Russian (Me too) . I hated that I couldn't understand when he spoke in Russian but I was too caught up in apologies and sobs to pay attention to his murmurs.

He put me down, although I kept my arms around his waist, as he opened the door. He picked me up again when we were inside. He probably didn't want me to destroy his apartment with my clumsy stumbling.

The alcohol was slowly leaving my system, very slowly, but my mind was starting to clear. My judgements weren't as rash although it didn't stop me from falling onto Dimitri's lap.

'Roza.' He sighed. 'This is too much. I wasn't sure yesterday but I see it now. You need to get out of foster care, it's taking its toll on you and I can't watch as that happens.' His short speech caused more tears to roll down my cheeks. Why did he always have to be so right?

'I just want them back.' I cried into his lap. 'They loved me, nobody does now. No one gives a damn whether I live or die!' My sobs became louder and louder as I clutched his wet shirt.

'I care.' He murmured as he stroked my hair. I looked up at him and lost myself in his eyes.

That is when I admitted to myself that I was in love with Dimitri Belikov.

word count: 993


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