Holding Everything

Chapter 3: Too Late

"This is not a dream; you have quite a long, hard and very tragic road ahead of you. You did not choose to be this way, and you did not wish it either. But sometimes, that is just how fate works. You will think you are cursed, you will think you have the absolute worst life, but understand that because you are you, and no one else but you; that life is only as hard as you make it."

I read the passage and hesitate, "w...where's the rest?" This enormous book, well over five hundred pages is completely blank, nothing but the title on the front and this one passage a few pages in where '1' read at the bottom right corner. I sigh and close the book, utterly confused at why everything keeps getting more and more confusing. I lean against the wall on my bed and wonder if the irritation I felt when Lillya came in was the feeling I was supposed to get when my gift is awakened. "Argh!!" I kick my feet out in frustration, cursing under my breath as to why everything is so complicated, "Just spell this shit out for me! This aint school!" I get up and angrily grab my phone and head out, slipping my shoes on and slamming the door.

As I walk down the street, I listen to the sounds of the night, nothing but the cars driving by and the occasional closing door from someone's car or home. It's pretty late, I should probably go back to school tomorrow or else I'll be way behind. I walk down to a nearby convenience store and buy a twenty-five cent lollipop and head home. Inside I look around to waste time, I notice a guy at the counter, buying what looks like snacks, he catches my attention because his hair is blonde, almost a bleach blonde, he walks out and I watch him go, wondering why his presence intrigues me so much, "must be the hair." I think to myself. I go to the counter a buy my lollipop, sticking it in my mouth as I push the door open and head home. As I walk home I notice a little girl sitting on a curb, I freeze as I notice the same black flames engulfing her, the Black Path. I walk up and stand by her, "you okay?" I ask casually, not sure how to handle this exactly but willing to try anything to make the Black Path vanish somehow.

"The one good thing about this world is that there are so many ways to end your life, you can either do it yourself or find a way to make someone do it for you if you're too scared. But it's also scary because if you fail, you get sent away and are treated like an unstable psychopath, and nobody tries to understand what's wrong. People think a simple diagnosis will solve everything because now we have a name to your problems, when in reality they're just trying to buy more time." Her voice is monotone yet smooth, almost like someone is typing out her next sentence and she's just reading from a script.

"Were you given a false diagnosis?" I ask, trying to get somewhere; she smirks, confusing me even further.

"It doesn't really concern you but no, I wasn't, but..." she trails off, muttering words I can't make out but I assume she's just speaking to herself. "It was nice though," she stands up and smiles at me, a completely fake smile with sadness hidden beneath it, the Black Path gets stronger and she turns away from me, walking down the sidewalk normally. I decide to follow to make sure she gets home safe, which she doesn't seem to notice, as I get lost in thought I notice out of my peripheral that she breaks out into a sprint, running as if her life depended on it. I stop, knowing if I chased her it would seem like I was an attacker, especially since we're complete strangers. She continues running until she's in an open field, where there's nothing but an electric tower and a railroad around, she stops and turns towards me again, with a smile on her face. In the distance I hear the sound of a train's horn blowing, the breaks screeching, the railroad signs flash and the street bars lower as the train draws nearer. My eyes widen as I realize what she must be doing, her flame then turns red and I sprint for her, desperately trying to reach her. Tears fill her eyes alittle as her foot steps onto the tracks, "it was nice though," I remember her words just a while ago; everything goes silent, "to finally get that off my chest." Blood...everywhere.

The flames turn White and soon vanish as if being blown away by the wind; the train's breaks continue screeching like they were before, trying to stop but not being able to stop fast enough. It replays again in my mind, her last words uttered from her mouth, the train hitting her with such force, the blood, so much blood everywhere, all over me, all over the street, the train, everywhere. Just one second more and I could've made it, I know I could have, but I was too late, I saw the flame yet I was still too late; she's gone, a girl I've never even met before, is dead.

"Red...White...Path?"