Blinded Love Boyxboy

Part 5: Suffocated by Awkwardness

//Song Of The Day: David Lambert - Outlaws//
A/N: whaaaaaaat two updates in one day....CAN I GET A WHAT WHAT!!!! ( to anyone who knows that reframe I luv u)

// 1 month time skip //

A lot happened after that moment I had with Eli. After that kiss. I started thinking about it while I waited to be released from the hospital so I could go home. It would be a while so in the meantime my mind decided to fuck with me and give me a full flash back of what's happened

-I month earlier-
Eli pulled my head closer to his. Deepening the kiss. Our hands never parting and our lips moving in sync. I would have kissed him non stop if it wasn't for my lack of air and aching lungs. I broke the kiss, both of us breathing heavily and hoarse. Eli's eyes were closed and his mouth was wide open still breathing in the sweet air around us. I giggled and it startled him. He didn't say anything but I saw him smile. Or was it a smirk. "That was-indescribable, Matt" he said ending it with a chuckle " it-it was" I leaned in and pecked his lips one more time but before I could kiss him he moved away. He looked slightly uncomfortable. "Eli, I-I'm sorry I can't d-do this.." I closed my eyes hoping he didn't just reject me "Eli- why. I like you I do why can't we just..." I let out a shaky breath letting my heart pound out of my chest. "I-i-i-I'm s-sort i j-just c-can't. I'm gonna g-go..." I felt him let go of my hand, grabbed his things and walk out my door. I was paralyzed, I was shocked, I was sad. I ended up crying myself to sleep that night thinking of Eli.

For the next 4 days I didn't go to school. In fear of facing Eli again. I liked him, I actually liked him. He stole my first kiss and my heart. But he wouldn't like me. He admitted he did but if he liked me then why couldn't we get together? That whole week I ate nothing. Just some small stuff like water or a piece of a fruit. I was in my room deep in thought. I was thinking about Eli again. He left his stuff here and he hasn't come back to get them. I wouldn't be surprised if he ever came back at all. No one cares about me. My own fucking parents didn't care about me. My own brother wanted me gone and out of his life for good. And the only friend I've made this whole year, left because of a kiss. I always screw things up. For me. For Eli. For Will. For fucking everyone! I suddenly felt a familiar taste and acid come up my throat about to come out my mouth.
I rushed through my apartment, went to the bathroom and lifted the toilet lid up and threw any food I ate today and yesterday down the drain. I sat there waiting for more to come out. After a little while I got on my feet and went to the sink. I washed my face and brushed my teeth and went to my living room to watch tv.

I saw him this week. I went back to school the next week and I saw him. He was talking to Nathan, a boy a grade above ours. Why would he be talking to Nathan? I kept asking myself questions until I saw his beautiful blue eyes stare at me. He knows I'm there I can feel it. I left and went on with my day. Which was spy on him and Nathan

Today is Friday. I skipped the last 3 days because I was sick and depressed. Word around the school is that Nathan is Eli's new guide. But I don't mind. He hates me anyway, so why wouldn't I give him the pleasure of kicking me out of his life for good. The whole weekend I binged. I binged so bad. I ate two hotdogs with a side of crisps and a medium drink on Saturday and on Sunday I ate three tacos with some vodka. I gained 3 pounds in those two days. So now it's Monday and I'm at school. Well in my hiding place that is. Apparently Nathan was recruited to join Adams gang of friends and he beat me up pretty bad. Eli wasn't there which only made them beat me more "just ya wait faggot. Your little blind friend is next" I heard Adam say before I got a blow in the head. Adam lifted my head from my hair and looked me in the eyes."Won't to be fun to play with him for a little while"

I had some serious bruises and cuts so j went to the hospital to get checked. They said I had two bruised ribs a sprained wrist and I needed stitches for one of the cuts on my leg. I stayed in the hospital for another week in recovery until my wrist heals and my stitches are out.

-present-

When I left the hospital today I didn't expect someone picking me up. But what I didn't expect the most was for that someone to be the one and only Elliott Beckett. I walked up to the desk and signed some release papers. That's when something happened "Matthew can you wait a minute?" I turned around to see it was my doctor "Uh... sure"

"Well Matthew I checked your blood levels and saw signs of low sodium and weakening organs in your blood work. Matthew, I suspect these are signs of bulimia or anorexia nervosa. Correct me if I'm wrong, but do you starve yourself or have starved yourself?" I look down at the floor and open my mouth to say something but the words wouldn't come out. So I just nodded faintly. "Well I'm going to give you some medication to help you in this, I also recommend you to talk to someone about this. If this is bulimia or anorexia nervosa it can be fatal to you" I nodded and he gave me a paper with a prescription drug.

Great more things to make me feel crazy. What fun....

The doctor sent a nurse to check me one last time. I came out clean. She brought me my stuff and I left the room to see the doctor talking to Elliott. Great now HE'S gonna think I'm crazy. I walked up to the nurse, I shook his hand hand and started to leave. As I walked out the door I could feel the fresh air hitting my face and the warm sun burn my skin. It was good to be out of there.

We started walking (awkwardly) towards my apartment. My hands on my hoodie pockets and his hands on his side with one holding the cane. The whole walk to my apartment I wanted to scream at him, but at the same time just hug him and kiss him. Ugh. This complete silence crap is driving me crazy! I start to go deep in thought again, thinking i could get away from this silence if I just went deep. I was wrong....

What's wrong with you

Nothing

What do you mean NOTHING!! You faggot, 'oh look at me I'm Matt no one loves me so I'm just gonna starve myself'

Shut up!!

Why should I? it's the truth. No one gives two shits about you. Not even your parents. Hell not even your brother gives a crap!!

SHUT UP!

Or what?! Is Matty here gonna have a breakdown

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

GO FUCKING DIE YOU FAGGOT!!!

My head felt dizzy and I started to see black spots in my vision. My legs felt weak. I felt my body and everything went black

//The Next Day//

I woke up in my bed, confusion and fear entering my body and corrupting it. how did I get here? Why am I in bed? I was at the hospital last time? I turned around to lay on my side and I saw another body in my bed. At first I was started but soon I recognized the beautiful boy laying next to me.....

Eliott Beckett

Stay Sexy Freaks........Adios!!!!