Unspoken

letter 10

10 / letter to someone you don't talk to anymore

Dear Ella,

Hey, how are you?

I miss you more than you could imagine.

So much has happened over the past year you’ve been gone.

I’m glad you’re somewhere better now though.

I’m so glad you’re not going from foster home to foster home or living with Patrick.

You’re safe. You’re finally safe.

I remember how bad things got and nobody could be more worried than I was.

I didn’t let you know but I was terrified Ella, I had never been in a situation like that.

It was so tough seeing you come to school with bruises or black eyes. It was tough seeing you blame it on yourself and acting like it wasn’t a big deal. You were a mess Ella and Patrick was a bastard.

And you needed help. But you were so damn stubborn to ask.

I could understand your hesitation to go into another foster home. But you’re so lucky to have found such good people who were willing to adopt you.

The Halls are good people.

The only bad part was that they lived all the way on the other side of the country.

They had come to visit Boston all the way from California. And they were looking to adopt. You were so lucky that day Ella.

I miss you more than you could imagine. We don’t speak anymore. it’s hard when you live about 3,000 miles away from each other.

I hope you remember me and miss me too.

I wish you were still here. I wish I could tell you everything. Charles doesn’t understand a lot of things. You know him. He’s all sports and Roman. Oh, he and Roman are still together by the way. I’m so scared for him Ella, I really am, and every time I try to tell him to leave Roman, he gets defensive and tells me I don’t understand. I really don’t know why he stays with him Ella. He’d listen to you if you were here, I know he would. You have a way with words, you always have.

I wish I could tell you about my parents. They keep getting worse every day. They try to get closer to me but they’re so bad at providing comfort that all they do is push me away. And I feel like it’ll get to a point where I’ll leave and I just won’t ever look back. I’m taking care of Oliver. I’ve promised I’ll stay for him. It’s a promise that gets harder to keep every day.

Sometimes I get so lonely Ella. It’s just hard letting people in anymore. All they do is stab me in the back. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of a lot of things.

But, I wonder how you’re doing.

Have you made tons of new friends? How’s school? Do you like the sun in California?

There’s so many things I’d love to ask and tell you Ella.

I wish we still spoke.

Love,

Olivia

 xoxo

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