Lurk

ＣＨＡＰＴＥＲ ＴＨＲＥＥ

"Hey." A voice came from beside me, causing me to jump and curse under my breath. I closed the book I was reading and put it aside.

"Would you at least give me some alert before you appear?!" I stood up and turned around to face Xavier.

"What aren't you wearing pants?" He asked, his eyes traveling down to my nearly bare leg.

"I'm wearing hot shorts! I only wear them at home, because I'm supposed to have privacy, but that was before a certain someone-"

I stopped mid sentence when he put his hand on the intersection of my leg and hips, his big hands touching the skin exposed from my crop top. I felt my face heating up and my throat closing on the air trying to enter.

I quickly gathered myself together and slapped his hands away, my face and neck still on fire. I managed to squeak, "What the fück are you doing?!"

"It's not hot." He asked me, a cute confused frown on his face.

"Are you serious right now?" I looked at him in disbelief.

He burst of laughing, throwing his head backwards kind of laugh, "I know what a hot short is, I'm just messing with you. Your reactions never fail to make me laugh."

I gritted my teeth and hit him on his chest, "Why are you even here?"

"Just thought I would come say hi" he shrugged, a grin still on his face.

"Didn't we make a deal that you leave after they go last time?"

"And I did, didn't I?" he smirked. Gosh, does he ever stop smirking?

"Fine, didn't I tell you not to come again?" I crossed my arms.

"And I clearly said we'll see about that. Besides, I didn't get to ask you any questions, did I?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Cut the crap, why are you here?"

He shrugged and went to sit on my bed, "Curiosity." 

"What curiosity?" I turned to him and furrowed my eyebrows.

"I heard you, you know." he stated, looking at me.

He heard me. Does he mean he heard what I said when I thought he left? That can't be possible, he left!

"What do you mean?" I slurred.

"In the bathroom." I held myself from sighing in relief, "Now I get to ask, what rumor?"

Should I tell him? I've been wanting someone to talk to for so long, and now I have one. He might not be the most trustworthy out there, but he's my only option. I need someone to listen, I'm sick of talking to myself.

I sighed and went to sit on the bed next to him, "Two years ago, I was still in high school. My dad died a year before it, mum has been never around after that. She's always working and going on business trips, leaving me home alone since I'm an only child."

I glanced up to him to check if he was listening, "One day I wasn't feeling well, so I took painkillers. I took two each while, because they didn't help at all. I guess I wasn't counting how much I was taking. Next thing I know, I'm waking up in a hospital room and mum telling the police that I've been really depressed since my dad's death and that I tried committing suicide. She said I was unconscious when she found me. She never treated me the same after that, she's treating me like I'm crazy, delicate. Weak."

My voice started to womble so I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, gaining my voice and confidence again. 

I was about to continue, but I paused when I felt something touch my hand, I look down beside me to find Xavier's hand holding mine. He gave my hands a little squeeze, a sign that he's here, that he's real, that he's really listening, that he might care.  

I looked away from our hands connected and continued, "When they released me a week later and I returned to school. News have already gone viral in school, no one dared to talk to me, even my own friends- my own best friends. Teachers acted like they're walking on eggshells around me. I couldn't take it anymore, I stayed at home and refused to go to school. Mum offered me to let me finish my last year in homeschool and I agreed. Then I never bothered to apply to college, no one will accept me anyway. Mum still never home, I have no friends, I don't go out unless I need grocery. I have pretty much no one but myself."

I looked at him, he was already staring at me with an emotion I couldn't really define. I really hope it's not sympathy. He opened his mouth to say something, but I beat him by putting my finger on his lips, "No, don't say anything."

And he did shut up, he closed his mouth again and just let us hang in silence.

Then he suddenly grabbed my legs and put them on either side of him, tilting my body along so that I'm now straddling him. He looked at me smiling, his face only a couple of inches away from mine.

"What are you doing?" I said breathlessly, hating that he has this effect on me.

He didn't respond, but he kept looking me right in the eye. "You should see what happened to you as a good thing."

"And why is that?" I whispered quietly.

"Because you're not dealing with this cruel world, which doesn't make you like them. You're innocent." 

"I'm innocent?" I furrowed my eyebrows a little bit

"Yes. You're innocent and pure." He chuckled and tucked one lock of my hair behind my ear, "And naive."

I gasped playfully and hit him on his shoulder, "I'm not naive."

He leaned in, tilting his head to the side a little so he doesn't bump his forehead against mine.

He leaned closer, and I closed my eyes, waiting to feel his lips against mine. But it never came.

I opened my eyes to see him looking at me amused, smirking.

I blushed instantly and backed away from him, sitting probably beside him. I feel humiliated and embarrassed by what he just did, he led me on and made a fool of me.

He laughed, his chest vibrating against me. "See?"

"See what?" I glared at my hands on my lap, not daring to look at him. How dare he laugh?

"Don't you get it? That was a test. You shouldn't let me stay in your house, you shouldn't let me close to you or touch you, you shouldn't tell me anything about you. But you easily just gave in. This world isn't all good, Athena. You're naive."

"You're not ready for this." He then muttered in a really low voice, like it wasn't meant for me to hear.

"Are you trying to say I shouldn't trust you?" I turned to look at him but he was looking away, finding interest in the wall on the other side of the room.

"Yes. You shouldn't trust anyone just because they're your only option for having a friend. Especially not a person you only saw for the second time." His voice neutral.

"But you said you're not evil." I asked confused, what is he on about? Was he lying to me? Is he a bad guy?

"You also shouldn't believe whatever is said to you."

But he can't be bad? He may be a little childish and flirty, but he's not evil. He can't be evil.

"But I know you, you're not a bad guy." I said softly.

"You know me? You only saw me twice, how the fück do you know me, huh? You don't know anything about me." He stood up and faced me. I had to look up to look at him since he was towering over me.

He's right. I know nothing about him.

"Well, you're right. I know nothing about you." I gupled, "But I know enough to know you're not a bad person."

He looked away and kept pacing around the room.

He stopped and muttered, "I know, but sometimes good people have to do bad things."

"What do you mean?" Just as the words fell out of my mouth, the front door's bell rang.

"Is that your mum?" He turned to look at me, frowning.

"No, she won't be back anytime this month." I frowned as well, standing up.

Who could that possibly be?