I hear screaming as I ride through the forest. I see a walker and ride faster with my machete out to one side and I slice it's head. I see it fall to the ground and Andrea quickly stands up.
"Isabelle?" Ana asks
"I've got good news" I smile "Carl was shot, that's not good, but I found them"
"Who's them?" Daryl asks
"Her family, asshole" Ana mutters and he elbows her
"How's Carl?" Lori asks and gets on the horse
"Lead them to the farm. You know where it is" I tell Ana and I continue on my way back to the farm.
•••
When I arrive, Lori is jumping off the horse before I can stop it. I get off and Beth takes the horses restraints from my hands to take her back to the stables. I walk into the house and Lori was crying into Ricks arms. I sigh, it's not like Rick and I were anything, I'm just jealous.
"Rick needs another transfusion" Dad tells me and Rick walks to me. I sit him down at the kitchen table and stick a needle in his arm. I hear footsteps and see Lori.
"Can you grab some orange juice, he's gonna need it" I say to her and she walks to the fridge to do so "glasses are above the sink" I say and look back to Rick "you look like shit" I mumble to him trying to lighten the mood but he seems to be in a daze.
I pull the needle and set it on the table.
"Lighten up, if Shane and Otis make it back" I start
"They'll make it back" Lori 'corrects' me
"When they make it back. Carl will have a 99% chance of living through the procedure. He's done it before"
"You know Hershel?" Lori asks
"He's my dad"
"Is he a doctor"
"Veterinarian"
"Is that really who we want to trust?" Lori says to Rick and I stand up out of my chair
"It's not like you've got doctors lined up for you. Trust the vet or let your son fucking die for all I care" I say and leave the room
"Isabelle" Rick calls my name weakly
"Isabelle!" I hear a louder voice and stop to see Maggie
"Yeah?"
"Calm down. Take a walk"
I felt myself zone out.
"Isabelle?" She said closer to me and Rick standing behind her from a distance
"I-I'm sorry" I mustered out
"You don't me the apology" Maggie said and titled her head to Rick
"I didn't say shit to Rick"
"You said stuff about his kid"
"Lori deserved it. She doesn't trust dad like she fucking has options of doctors for Carl. It ain't like that anymore"
"Isabelle. Please"
"I'll tell her you said sorry" Rick says
"Don't treat her like a child. She's a grown woman. She can say sorry" Maggie stops him
"Don't you treat me like your mom. Because you're not, moms dead" I spat and stormed out and out into the yard. I yelled out into open air as if someone would take me away. First day back and I can't do it.
"Isabelle" I heard Rick call
"What?" I said with my back to him
"Can we talk?"
"About what?"
"What you said" he said when he was standing at my face
"Guess I don't have s choice now"
"Listen. Lori didn't mean to disrespect you or your family, she's just worried"
"I didn't mean to disrespect you and your family either" I say no making eye contact
"Look at me"
"Why?"
"I wanna see your face"
"Fuck off"
"Isabelle"
I looked at him and pushed my finger into his chest "listen to me. As long as that ring" I say grabbing his left hand and putting it in his face "is on your finger. You're a married man. A loyal, married man. And I'm not a home wrecker. That was my dads job" I turn away to walk back home.
When I get inside I feel calmed. I see Lori but she gave me this understanding nod, which I returned. I looked to check on Carl and his stomach was distended. I felt a presence behind me and saw Lori again.
"I didn't mean it" I whisper
"I know"
"You're son is beautiful"
"Thank you" she says with a smile and walks into the room all the way.
I turn my back to the wall outside and mess with my necklace again, listening in on their conversation.
"His stomach is distended. We need to operate soon, with or without the equipment" Dad tells them to truth of the situation
"But doesn't that mean he's more likely to die?" Lori whines and I roll my eyes
"He'll die for sure without it"
"Shane and Otis. They should be back. What if they ran into trouble. I can go look for them" Rick says and walks out the room
"You're not going" I say
"Why?" He asked looking for something
"Lori needs you. Carl needs you. That's your family and you can't leave. What if Carl's condition worsens and Lori has no one. That'll be on you. What if you just miss them and you go into that high school lookin for them, but they're long gone. What if it's overrun and you're there alone. Or you just put yourself in that sticky situation with them. Maybe you should stay here. Here, there aren't any what ifs"
"What if Carl dies?" He says with all seriousness and looking into my eyes, his chest almost touching mine
"You'll be there for her. You're wife" I say standing tall
I hear someone clear their throat and Rick and I turn their way. I saw it was my dad. Rick quickly left and went back into the room.
"He's married, Izzy" (I get her name has an 's'. But no one says Issy) he says
"I know that. I was just convincing him to stay. For his wife"
"Good. Whatever you said worked"
"Yeah" I mumbled and looked back into the room as Dad left.
Rick held Lori close to him. I stared at them, jealous. I wanted someone to hold me like that. To love me and tell me it's all gonna be okay, even if it isn't. I wanted someone.
I FUCKING CRIED WRITING THAT LAST PART BC LIKE. ITS WHAT I WANT.
