I found myself out in the yard at some point. Andrea, Shane, T-Dog and Jimmy just finished digging graves.
"Can you tell Daryl we're ready?" Lori asks
"Yeah" I say and walk to the RV.
I knocked on the door, Daryl looked at me from the counter.
"I'm sorry" I say before anything else
"We're all hurtin. I don't need pity"
"Well, we're ready for the service" I turn and leave not wanting to fight.
Everyone had gathered except for Carol. Daryl stood a few feet from everyone else. It was silent and you could hear the insects chittering and feel the breeze passing through. Shane was the first to walk away and threat led to everyone else soon walking away to go on with their days.
•••
Glenn and I were in the same room, I was on the sofa and he leaned against a wall. Maggie walked to him and I tried to tune out.
"If your groups leaves, are you gonna stay?" She asks him "you too, Isabelle"
"I hadn't really thought about it" Glenn says
"I don't know what I'd do. I'll cross that bridge when we get there" I say and then stop listening knowing they'd go on about it.
I was startled when I heard a bunch of glass break. I turned to see Beth was on the ground. I sprung up and ran with Maggie. We both carried her up to her room. Maggie sat in with her while I stood outside. I couldn't see her like that. I saw Lori come down the hall and stopped at me.
"What happened to her?" She asked peeking her head in the room
"It might be shock" I reply
"Where's Hershel?" She says now standing in between the bedroom and the hallway
"Can't find him anywhere" Glenn says from inside the room
"Come with me" Lori says and we go to find Rick.
Rick came with Shane. We went to Hershel's room and he has boxes set out on the bed full of things. Rick rummaged through.
"Stepmothers things?" He asked me
"It's hard to let them go, I guess. That was his wife" I said leaning against the vanity
"Looks like he found an old friend" Shane says waving a flask and threw it to Rick.
"That was my grandfathers. He gave to my Dad when he died" I say taking a hold of it
"I didn't take Hershel for a drinker" Rick says
"He gave it up when me and my mom joined the house. He didn't even allow liquor in the house"
"What's the local bar called?"
"Hatlins, I think. Haven't been around here in a while"
"I bet that's where we'll find him" Rick says walking to me
"We?"
"You're going with me. You're his oldest"
"I'm not blood"
"But, you're still the oldest. Most mature"
"Why can't Glenn go?"
"Glenn isn't his kid"
I nodded in agreement. Arguing would be pointless.
I walked downstairs to wait. I heard Lori call his name and I rolled my eyes hearing her. I then heard footsteps.
"You ready?" Rick asked as he walked past me
"Yeah" I nod and get up to follow him.
He loaded his gun in the car and handed me another one.
"Thanks" I mumbled and he started the car and drove off.
•••
We drove through the vacant streets of the town. The sound of birds filled the air. Last time I was driving down this road, it was full of life. People waved as you drove down and sat out in the hot Georgia air without a care. Dogs sprawled out, panting from the heat, bowl of hot water in front of their faces. They were too lazy to move, too old to care.
"Does this feel familiar yet?" Rick asked looking at the road
"Yeah" I say looking at the road also "why'd you really want me to come? Glenn is fast"
"You can shoot a gun, Glenn can shoot a gun. You're fast, almost as fast as Shane, and Glenn is fast. But Glenn has a girlfriend back home"
"I got people too" I say looking at him
"But Maggie needs someone. Plus, you're coming out here for your dad. Why would I bring a random Asian boy who Hershel didn't even like in the beginning" he says with his vision switching from the road to me. I laughed at his Glenn description.
"I guess" I say taking a deep breath "we're here" I breathe out and Rick pulls into the parking lot.
Rick loaded his gun and I did so too. We walked quietly and carefully with our guns ready in hand. I never liked runs, it was nerve wracking. Never knowing what's behind the door. Rick pushed open the door first and since he didn't shoot, I assumed we were good. I walked behind him into the bar and we saw Dad sitting alone. He didn't even move when we came in.
"Hershel" Rick says
"Who's with you?"
"Isabelle"
Rick walked to him and I followed behind him. I still feared drunk men, wether it be because of my father or Shane, I didn't like them. I've never seen Hershel drunk, I doubt he was violent, but you can never know. I kept my distance.
"How many have you had?" Rick asked
"Not enough"
"Let's finish this up, back at home. Beth collapsed, in some sort of state. Possibly shock, I think you are too"
"Is Maggie with her?
"Yes. But Beth needs you"
"What could I do? She needs her mother or rather to mourn like she needed to, weeks ago. I robbed her of that. I see that now"
"You thought there was a cure. You can't blame yourself for that, holding onto hope"
"Hope? When I first saw you with your boy in your arms. I had little hope he'd survive"
"But he did"
"I also hoped that Isabelle would never have to see me drunk. But here we are. She won't even speak because she's so scared" he said his voice cracking.
I slowly walked to him and put my hand on his shoulder. I jumped at the fear of what would come next, but no hit ever came. He only looked at me with tears and regret in his eyes. I knew he really cared. No matter what I said in the past or whatever differences we've had, he just doesn't want me to be afraid of him, because he cared.
