The Downfall Of Us [ LGBT STORY]

Chapter Eighteen: Illness Of The Weak

One thing, Kim hated about school morning was having to climb dozens of stairs to go to a class, she really didn't care about. The lessons she had were all pointless to her.  Kim decided that she would ditch her first lesson in the toilets not wanting to deal with being in a classroom filled with assholes. 

Even though she was ditching class, she knew that she had to soon face the reality and attend her lessons next week. Ronnie would probably find out that she was ditching class and would hover her with uncomfortable questions. She didn't want to have everyone fussing over her again.

She entered the bathroom and jumped a little upon seeing a figure, bent down into a fetus position that had her back towards turned away from Kim. There was no sound but Kim could clearly hear the hushed sobs that ached to be heard.

"Are you okay" Kim whispered, moving closer to the girl to try and comfort her, but had made sure that she still gave the girl some personal space.  The girl had turned her face around and it turned out to be Vienna. Her cheeks were puffed out to the point it matched her puffy eyes, her eyes were red and looked like she had been crying for a long time. 

"Yeah" Vienna croaked cursing that fact that she couldn't sound normal. She pulled a smile that never quite reached her eyes and whispered softly, "I'm fine. You can go back to class now".

Kim had stared at Vienna for what seemed like an hour before she sat down next to Vienna. Kim knew how it felt to be caught crying by someone. It seemed kind of pathetic, but whenever she told people that she was fine and that they could carry on their day and without worry, deep down in her heart, she just had wanted them to stay. 

It was silent for around 3 minutes before Vienna had finally spoken, her voice sounding more stable. "Thanks for staying," Vienna said, not breaking eye contact with the floor. 

"I should go now," Vienna said, moving to get up. She had lifted herself off the floor and before she knew it, her legs had started to shake involuntarily She could feel herself leaning to one side and knew she was going to soon lose her balance. Luckily Kim had caught her.

"I can tell that you not fine, mentally or physically, herself" Kim said, her hands still on Vienna's shoulders. Kim wanted to crouch to take a look at Vienna's knee, but felt Vienna's body jerk away from her. 

"You don't have to pretend to care alright. Stop this pretence and fake act that will make me believe I'm worth worrying about" Vienna said, her eyes scrunched up in pure annoyance as she shifting herself away from Kim. 

"You shouldn't think like that" Kim said, rising up to gently grab Vienna's waist. Vienna's eyes widened at the fact that their faces were brought closer. It had looked like Kim didn't notice, the lack of personal space they both had as she stared at Vienna's.

Vienna felt her stomach flutter with butterflies. She kept her eyes focused on the floor, but had kept sneaking glances at Kim to find that Kim's stare hadn't wavered. 

Vienna had friends that made her believe that she was worth something. That she could escape her nightmare that she was forced to re-live and protect the people she loved the most. 

But of course, people pretended for the sake of being nice. They never really care about her. She was tired of everyone pretending to care for her and giving her hope that she possibly couldn't trust Kim's intentions. 

"I can't escape my thoughts as easily as other people. Especially if you're reminded by people how pathetic you are. I find no relief in being alive. Why is that the people that are always the kindest are treated so wrong. What God, did I piss off to deserve this," Vienna said, gripping Kim's shoulder tightly. 

The outburst had caused Vienna's eyes to well up. Vienna hated herself. The fact that she was so emotional, so emotional that she couldn't stop the tears coming out of her eyes. No one wanted a friend, that cried about the simplest things. 

Yes, indeed she had wanted to be the girl that everyone liked. The strong, independent type that could face all her troubles with a smile. But Vienna was different. She was the complete opposite. 

Different was good, but sometimes it wasn't better. 

"You were never pathetic and those mindless people only put others down because they love seeing someone more miserable than them. The fact that you can show your emotions means that you are damn strong. Only weak people hide their tears" Kim said, slowly placing Vienna back on the floor. 

"You know, my friend Amy hated when I always forgave people who bullied me, back in my old school," Kim said, leaving a huff of laughter as she took a place beside Vienna again. Kim grabbed her knees and smiled fondly at the way everyone used to fuss at her. Sure, she had found it annoying when everyone treated her like she would break from someone's words nevertheless she still loved the fact they gave her attention. 

Maybe it was that night has Kim committed a crime that had possibly changed how everyone treated her. Kim was a person that could forgive people without batting an eyelid, but her father was an exception. Hell would have to freeze over for her to ever feel a pang of forgiveness in her heart for her father, but somehow she had still felt guilty, that she had committed a sin that was unforgivable.

With a tap on a shoulder, Kim was released from the unwanted thought that always tried to consume her.  "You were saying," Vienna said, her eyes still puffy and red.

"Amy had always told me this whenever I refused on taking revenge on my bullies. Kindness is the illness of the weak" Kim said. 

Vienna had given Kim, a throaty chuckle. "What's so funny, I'd like to to laugh too," Kim said, pouting. "Nothing, it seems's that your friend, is low-key calling you weak," Vienna said, giving Kim a teasing smile.

"No, she wasn't. She was calling me kind. In my books that's a compliment," Kim said, but it sounded as she was trying to convince herself that. Vienna had continued to laugh, feeling better that she was able to joke with someone so freely.

Kim had noticed that she had been able to get Vienna to be comfortable with her without any steps or plans. Maybe all she needed to do was be herself. 

"Has anyone ever told, your really cute?" Kim said, staring at Vienna's face. Vienna had blushed and looked down smiled shyly. Vienna looked up to find Kim hadn't removed her gaze. 

"Is this what you do, in your spare time. Comfort girls in the toilet, then flirt with them" Vienna said, raising an eyebrow.

"Only the girls that are worth it," Kim said smoothly, giving a slick smirk. "I don't know about you, but I wouldn't mind skipping the whole day with you," Kim said, trying to suggest they should both skip school.

Vienna has bit her lip, thinking of whether she was going to take the risk. She really liked Kim but wasn't so sure if she should let herself attached to Kim. " Yeah, okay," Vienna said, not knowing why she chooses to follow Kim. 

"Let's go then," Kim said, directing a limp Vienna out of the bathroom. "And don't worry. I'll take good care of you" Kim whispered into Vienna ear. Vienna felt herself something tingle inside her belly and she blushed once again. Normally she would freak out with something being said to her like that, but she was sure that Kim would never intentionally hurt her.

It was funny. You could be alone for a long time and not trust anyone and all it takes is someone who is nice to you, to let yourself become vulnerable again.