The Bacon Cat Randomness Returns

Serious Announcement

Alright alright. So I guess with this morning "going so super duper well no sarcasm intended, (sarcasm actually intended)" it's time for me to tell you all about my issue.
It began right after my brother was diagnosed with diabetes back in February. It started as the usual questions after anything life changing like this. "Was it my fault?" "If there is a God, is this his way of punishing me?" "And if I'm so bad, do my friends even like me?", but then as I tried to stop it, I ended up just covering it up. And it got worse. I was consistently crying myself to sleep and questioning everything I had done that day worried that it wasn't the right thing. I began to freak out because I realized how insignificant I was in the workings of the universe. I realized how unlikely it was I would ever do something widely meaningful. I stopped crying myself to sleep luckily in about a week, but the regret and constant pressure on myself didn't go away. Instead of crying myself to sleep, I got panic attacks. I also was extremely moody. The littlest thing could drive me to tears.
That's the way I still am today. And I'm here to just say if anything happens (or happened)- it's not your fault. It's mine. The good news is I'm going to go to my counselor again for this, and hopefully it will help solve this. But until then, here's a quick guide on what you can do to help when I'm having an anxiety attack:
First, let's explain them. They can come in many forms. My most common is bursting into tears, but I also can be extremely nervous and refuse to talk for fear of saying something wrong. With both of these things, the best thing for you to do is just to give me a minute alone to let myself think things through. My logical part of my brain will take over after a while, and I'll be back to usual. Try not to pester me or push me. It won't help and it will in fact make it worse.
Another thing I've been having recently is just illogical fear of doing certain things. I will try to overcome all of these, but it will take a while. For now I'm focused on the main issue- my anxiety.
Anyways, this post was mostly just me letting all of you know straight what's been going on. I love you guys. Sorry for being a mess.