A Friendship Or More

Misunderstanding

I woke up the next day. I didn't want to go to work. I felt like crap, but I knew if I called in that everyone would know why. It was rocket science. Norman and I had been inseparable for two months. Now, well I woke up on my own, so I'm assuming that was all changing.
I picked up my phone, it was only five am. I sighed. No text or calls from Norman, and I knew he was up. I closed my eyes, I tried to fall back to sleep. I just ended up replaying the worst movie in my head for an hour.
Me and Norman, always together, always laughing. Fast farward to the end. Norman telling me he didn't want a relationship. Me feeling like and ideot, alone crying, wishing I'd never met him. It hurt that bad, I'm not sure why. I knew from the beginging there would never be anything between us. Why did I let it bother me?
I sighed getting up, my head hurt, and I needed to get ready for work. After a shower I didn't feel any different, or better. I picked out clothes, I didn't
know why I still tried to look cute. Norman odviously wasn't impressed. I gave my self a once over. I looked ok I guessed, but I felt like crap. I guessed it was better to look good, then look like you feel.
I pulled in to the parking lot. I looked for a spot to park. Of course right next to Noman's, Jeep was opened. I sighed. I didn't want to see him, I mean I wasn't stupid, I knew I would. I knew I might have to talk to him, I just hoped it was short.
I walked to the make up trailor. A couple of the other artists were already there. They smiled at me as I walked by. I smiled back unsure of what was going on. I made it to my station and on my counter were at least a dozen or so Japanese Lillys. I was shocked, I found the card and opend it.
'I'm sorry.'
Was scribbled in Norman's hand writing on it. I sighed. Sticking the card in my pocket and moving the flowers out of the way. I sighed, again, I didn't know what to do. I understand he was sorry, I was too. Sorry we would never work out. Sorry I wasn't tall, or pretty, or whatever Norman saw in them other girls. A coworker came up to me, breaking my train of thought. I didn't really notice her untill she started talking though.
"So Stephanie, do you have a secret admire?" She asked. I looked up at her, blankly.
"What? Oh no," I said lowly processing what she had said. She fround.
"Everything ok, hun? You seen distracted," she pointed out lowly. I breathed, a shallow breath.
"I'm fine," I shrugged it off. She looked at me a long moment, but everyone started to file in, so she went to her work station with out another word. I sighed heavy as I waited for my chair to be filled. I looked up for Norman. I found him, we shared a look. I looked away, I couldn't look at him, it hurt too much. My heart broke again. Norman took a seat with another of my coworkers. I breathed a little, knowing he wasn't comming down to my chair, it was a relief, sorta.
My chair was then filled and I looked down to see Travis. I blinked a few times, but I went to work.
"I was suprised to see your chair was open," he said lowly. I worked on what I was doing. "You ok?" He asked, when I didn't answer him.
"Fine," I shrugged. He looked at me now.
"I don't know it what world you live in, but sweety in my world, you don't look fine," he said calling my bluff. I looked at him.
"Just tired," I lied. He frownd at me. Clearly seeing I wasn't tired.
"Hey, look I get it, you don't know me, but of you want to," he smiled. He had a cute smile. I looked down at Norman, he was playing on his phone. I sighed, he aparently was fine.
"I'm still interested in lunch if you are," I said lowly, trying to smile. He smiled back at me.
The day went on, and nothing from Norman. It was finnaly lunch time and Travis came to get me.
"Hey," he smiled at me. I tried to smile at him. "So, I'm not sure what you like, but pizza seemed like a safe bet?" He asked. I nodded. 'Norman loves pizza' went threw my head. I sighed, why? Why did it always have to be about Norman?.
"Pizza is fine," I agreed. We went to his car and he held the door opend for me as I got in, i gave hI'm a small smile. Once I was in, I saw Norman and Andy walking tward us. Andy pointed me out and Norman looked right at me. I wanted to hide, but I also wanted him to see me. Then Travis started talking so I'm not sure what happend next.
"Hey, I don't want to be nosy, but if you need someone to talk to, I'm a good listener," Travis said. I looked at him.
"Am I that odvous?" I asked. He smiled.
"Yes, but also you and Norman aren't anywhere near each other, and that is unusual for the two of you," he said. I looked at him and sighed.
"It's nothing, just a misunderstanding," I said lowly. He looked at me.
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, you two seemed really happy together," he said. I looked ahead.
"We're just friends," I said lifeless.
"Oh," he said. "Well before you go the wrong idea about me, I do just wanna get to know you. You seem really cool," he smiled. I forced another smile.
"Ok," I said. I really hadn't thought anything weird about lunch with him. I mean Norman Reedus just turned me down, so what did anyone else want with me?
I road in mostly silance. Travis talked, Travis liked to talk. I could tell, he kinda reminded me of Norman, he got excited over little things. I cursed myself for thinking about Norman, I was hanging out with Travis. I tried my best to seem happy, I wasnt. I wasn't happy at all, I wanted to be with Norman. Even if we were just friends, he made me happy. I also cursed myself again for thinking about him as we pulled up to the restaurant. Travis was out of the car and at my side opening the door, again.
"My lady," he smiled. I smiled up at him.
"Thanks, hey do you mind if I smoke real quick?" I aksed, realizing how bad I wanted a ciggarette. Norman was always smoking, I smoked when he smoked. Now that he wasn't with me, and Travis clearly wasn't a smoker. I felt like I had to ask.
"Oh yeah, I'm sorry. Go ahead. I'll wait," he smiled. He was supper nice, I had to give him that. I smiled and lit up a ciggarette. "So, you don't talk much do you?" He asked with a small laugh, I kinda shrugged again.
"I'm sorry," I said, feeling like a jerk.
"No I understand it's fine, it was hard for me when my girlfriend broke up with me a month ago. I just didn't want to be around anyone. I can see that in you. I know you said you didnt have a break up, but you seem like your heart has been broken," he finished saying lowly. I looked at him.
"I didn't have a break up, but yeah I'm heart broken," I agreed. "I know pretty dumb of me, huh?" I asked looking for reassurance I was being silly. He looked at me.
"Most everyone on set thinks you were dating. I mean if I spend every waking moment with someone I'd probably development feelings for them too," he justified what I was feelings.
"Ohh," I said lowly. So I wasn't being dumb? He smiled.
"Ready? " He asked I looked at my ciggarette, it was gone.
"Yeah," I said dropping it and stomping out. We headed in and found a table. The waiter gave us our menus and we ordered drinks.
"So, what else are you in to? I mean you like pizza, but tell me about you," Travis said. I looked at him, what about me?
"I don't know, I'm really a boring person. I like to be at home, chilling..... Being borig," I laughed akwardly. What did I like to do? I just did what Norman did. Road the bike, he showed me his art, we watched movies. We talked, we just did whatever he wanted to. Then I realized that wasn't true. We did what I liked. I said I liked riding the bike, so we did. I wanted to see his art, so he showed me, I liked chilling on te couch with him watching movies and cuddleing, that's what we did. Travis watched me in silance.
"Figure something out? He asked, I looked at him.
"Yeah,"I said lowly. Norman did all the things I liked, but didn't like me, not like that anyways. I mean could you not like someone and still sleep with them? I didn't know, if I didn't have some sort of attraction to someone I deffenatly wasn't going to sleep with them.
"Well, I doubt your that boring," he smiled. I shrugged again.
"I don't know, I guess if you hang around me enough you'll find out," I said. Travis smiled again.
"So that's permission to keep hanging out with you?" He asked. I looked at him.
"I guess," I shrugged again.
The rest of lunch went good, I guessed. I mean Travis did keep talking to me, and he didn't seem to mind when I spaced off. He kept reassuring me I was fine. I felt like the worst person to go to lunch with. I was too busy thinking about Norman, but Travis was so nice. We made it back to the set and he again opend my door for me. He had done it evey time we got in or out of the car. I smiled and thanked him.
"So, I'll see you? Thanks for comming with me," he smiled. I smiled.
"No problem," I said. We said good bye and I headed back to the make up trailor. As I went inside I saw Andy.
"Hey," he said. I looked at him a moment.
"Hi," I said. I knew he was one of Norman's best friends, so he knew what was going on. Or mostly what was going on.
"He won't tell me anything," Andy said lowly, I looked up, shocked.
"What does he say?" I asked. Andy sighed.
"Nothing, he sulked all day. Then we saw you leave with Travis, he went in his trailor and refused to come out," Andy said. I looked at him.
"Is he still in there?" I asked. Andy nodded. I sighed. "What do you think I can do?" I asked. Andy looked at me.
"What happend?" He asked, more pleading. I looked down.
"A misunderstanding, he thought one thing I thought another. When it came down to it we weren't on the same page at all," I said. Andy sighed heavy.
"That doesn't tell me anything. He's never acted like this," he said starting to pass. Nervously? I was a bit annoyed. Why was he acting like he was?
"Well tell him he's a big fuckin baby, and grow up!" I finnaly growled. Andy looked at me. I was pissed he was the one who didn't want a relationship. He was the one who told me no! Why did he get to act like this?
"I think them words would be better from you," he said. I looked at him, I was mad.
"No! he wants to act like a spoiled brat and hid in his trailor, he can stay there, I'm not doing it," I said. Andy looked at me.
"He deffenatly upset you with this misunderstanding," he said as he headed out.
I stood there a second, stunned. Was I really that mad. Yes yes I was, I told him what I wanted. He said no. Now he was sulking like a two year old in his trailor? Over what? That I wouldn't sleep with him? That he had been turned down? That I went to lunch with Travis? He didn't get to act like this, his heart wasn't the one ripped out, he wanted soemthing casual. Friends with benefits. Why then? Why was he acting like this?
I decied then I was done, done feeling like I had lost something. I had, but aparently it wasn't important enough to get back. I felt if he wanted to be friends again we would work this out. Yes maybe a little while of avoiding each other, but the way he was acting? I wouldn't have acted like this if he would have been with someone.
The rest of the day was a blure, as I was to consumed in my pain and frustration to really focus on anything. Norman was being childish. I was in pain and it was all over for the two of us. I sighed and looked up to see Travis making his way to me, smiling.
"Hey I'm Glad I cought up with you," he said happily. I smiled at him. For some reason he seemed intressed in me. He was cute, I had to give him that. So I decided to give him a chance. If he was that interest in me. I had been sigle far too long.