Hetalia X Inanimate Objects

Finland X Rifle

Disclaimer: This is literally APH Finland having sex with a rifle. Dont like dont read.

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It was a cold, cold Finnish winter, Finland was cleaning off his gun collection with a content smile. Sweden, his "Husband", was at IKEA trying to clean off a sofa that had been "Dirtied" and "contaminated" by Denmark, Sealand, his son, was outside playing in the snow with Hanatamago their dog which left the Finn inside with his guns. He was currently cleaning off one of his prized Rifles. God he loved it so much. He used it often with target practice and even in his military sometimes. The shots were just so clean and satisfying.......He would shoot random targets with the gun just to please himself. God...what the fuck am i writing. He took the rifle in hand and walked around the house to make sure nobody was inside. He glanced outside to see Sealand busy playing with the dog and sighed. quickly he went into his bedroom with the gun and locked the door. It was about to get interesting....and i'm so sorry i just realized how fucked up this is.... Finland started stripping down his clothes, releasing his hardened length to the cold air. He sighed shakily and grabbed some lube from the drawer. It was usually for when Finland and Sweden had sex but now wasnt the time to think about the Swede. The only thing to be on his mind was the sexy ass gun on the mattress beside him. He squirted out a bit of lube and coated the barrel of the gun in the substance before turning around and slowly pushing the barrel into his ass. God it was so fucking cold but it felt so good. He pushed the barrel of the gun as far as it would go before shakily letting out a moan. It felt so good, so much better than Sweden could ever do to him. He slowly started to bounce himself back and forth on the barrel, ignoring how loud he was, The metal as hitting all the right spots inside him. Soon he couldn't handle it anymore and felt his release boiling up. He let out a scream as he came, tightening around the metal. He panted heavily and pulled himself off of the guns barrel. He would definitely keep this between himself and his lover, the gun. A few moments passed by as he came off his high and he glanced over to the window seeing Sealand and Hanatamago looking in. He let out a scream and covered himself. The end.

---note: I am so so so sorry why did i write this