Hetalia X Inanimate Objects

Canada x Hockeystick

I was suggested to do this. Trigger warning canadians. Trigger warning...

Canada was at one of his most beloved sporting games ever eh. A hockey game in Ottawa, Canada eh. He had been invited by the team since he was literally the representative of the country and hey he liked hockey eh. Why the fuck not eh? He had gotten some Tim Hortens before the game and was sitting with a box of donuts and a coffee eh. Halfway through the game englands fairys cast a spell on him and he got a massive fucking boner eh. Luckily he was sitting alone in the stand so he just casually fucking unzipped his pants and started to stroke himself as he watched the game eh? I mean he's practically invisible nobody will know aboot it right eh? So as the game continued his just fucking jacked off in the stand but then it hit him. One of the hockey players just lost grip of his hockeystick and it flung out into the crowd. Luckily the stick landed in the area canada was sitting so he grabbed it and ran the wood of the stick up the length of his dick eh. FOR FUCKS SAKE HOW IS NOBODY KNOWING ABOOT THIS EH!? SO HERE HE IS RUNNING THTIS FUCKING HOCKEY STICK UP HIS DICK WHILE OCCASIONALLY GIVING HIMSELF A PUMP OR SO EH AND HES JUSTW ATCHING THE GAME CASUALLY AND EVERYBODY IS JUST GOING ON ABOOT THEIR DAY. i swear im gonna offend a canadianoh my god. SOon he decided that this wasnt enough and stood up while pumping himself. Luckily he had a bottle of lube in his pocket because he was hoping of going home with one of the hockey players and getting laid eh? He took the lube out and literally fucking poured it all over the hockey stick before positioning it at his hole and slowly pushing it up into him as he jerked off. A loud moan came from him or atleast a loud moan for him as a canadian if you know what im talking aboot eh... he pushed himself back on the stick as he slowly moved it in and out of his ass, his stroking getting faster as he felt as if he was in heaven. Loud moans continued to erupt from him as his pumping and thrusting the stick in and out of himself got faster but it just stopped by....a hand on his shoulder eh...? He glanced back and saw the owner of the hockeystick and aboot 30 or 40 security men who didnt look very menacing.... I mean one of them was wearing a fucking moose hat for fucks sake eh! The security surrounded him and pulled the hockey stick out of him hesitantly and gave it back to the player....who in turn just threw it at the wall and threw up before storming out of the building and basically rage quiting eh. So the security grabbed his shoulders and pulled him out of the stadium "sorry eh.. But theres a rule about public nudity eh? even if you are the country.." a policeman apologized and took him to the nice and cozy prison in th middle of the wilderness made out of moose