The Online Experience

September 3, 1995

"I can't believe you finally came out with us tonight." Ally's voice was coated in giggles and her words hung on the careful verge of being completely slurred. Laughter shook through my entire form as I struggled with the deadbolt on the apartment door.

"Well," dramatically swinging the front door open in victory before we strode through, "if you can't bar hop on Labor Day weekend," stumbling into our narrow kitchen I grabbed two beers from the fridge and popped the tops off, "then when can you?" We both laughed as I handed Ally a beer before throwing myself down on the couch and kicking my shoes off.

"Damn straight!" Clinking our bottle necks together after the first few missed attempts, which only led to more drunken laughter. "When's Miko visiting?" A nearly violent laugh rattled through me as her words brought me back to the screaming match him and I had on the phone earlier today.

"Oh screw him!" My laughter only stopped when my head leaned back, letting nearly half of my dark beer slip down my throat.

"Whoa," Ally's eyes were wide as she watched me through her intoxicated haze as she continued to swing her bottle around in lazy circle by the neck, "what's going on?"

"I think he's cheating on me." Words cold as I studied the living room ceiling. "He should be visiting in a few weeks, we'll talk then. Or I'll probably talk and his pathetic ass will act like I'm crazy and have no idea what's going on. I talked to SixString about it and he thinks Miko is cheating and I had already thought about that but..."

"Hold on, who's SixString? Is that the online guy?" A silent nod was all I have her. "Sunday night guy?" Her voice went up an octave. "You're still chatting with him?" Another nod as her laughter rang out. "You know it's Sunday right?"  My head popped up as her statement sunk into my slightly fuzzy brain.

"Shit!" Sprinting to my computer and clicking that sign in icon.

"Damn girl! You got an online crush and you don't even know his name." Her manic laughter only grew.

"Oh shut up!" I yelled back, closing my door as I finally managed to sign on.

Grumpybluebear: Hi

SixStringGuy: Hey! I'd almost given up on you tonight.

Grumpybluebear: sorry. I went out for a while and just got back.

SixStringGuy: big party?

Grumpybluebear: nah, visited a few bars.

SixStringGuy: and how many bars is a few?

Pausing a minute I counted with my fingers to assist my hazy brain as I tried to remember where I had actually gone tonight.

Grumpybluebear: 7 if you go in the right order you can hit all the happy hours. College town :)

SixStringGuy: so you're drunk.

Grumpybluebear: no, buzzed. Never drunk ;)

SixStringGuy: never huh?

Grumpybluebear: never. Hey I talked to Miko today.

SixStringGuy: before you got drunk I hope.

Grumpybluebear: of course. It turned into a screaming match. I heard some woman on his end of the line and when I asked about it he got all defensive.

SixStringGuy: that's not healthy. When are you seeing him?

Grumpybluebear: 2 weeks from now. Did you propose? Hey I have a question.

SixStringGuy: I'm glad you're not drunk because drunk people ramble and can't focus :|
Ok, 2 weeks is good. No I haven't. And what is your question?

Grumpybluebear: what's your name?

SixStringGuy: why?

Grumpybluebear: because I was talking to my room mate about you and I referred to you by your screen name and it sounded really stupid so what's your name?

SixStringGuy: that's one hell of a sentence there. What's your name?

Grumpybluebear: Sydney. There. Now you have to tell me yours :)

SixStringGuy: ok. Jamie.

Grumpybluebear: Nice to meet you Jamie :)

SixStringGuy: and it's very nice to meet you Sydney :)  Now I know your not drunk, but you might feel better if you get some sleep.

Grumpybluebear: well Jamie, if you must know, I wouldn't be able to sleep even if I went to bed.

SicStringGuy: and whys that?

My loud giggling filled the room as I typed my response. As I slowly reread it for typos a small part of me said this wasn't the turn I wanted the conversation to take, but a bigger part was curious. Curious about how he'd react. But before I even had a chance to hit send he figured me out

SixStringGuy: Oh! You're just like my girlfriend.

Grumpybluebear: what?

SixStringGuy: she goes out drinking from time to time and I always wait up for her because she always comes back horny. You should have brought someone home.

Grumpybluebear: there's no one in this town I would bring home, besides I'm in a relationship.

SixStringGuy: for now.

Grumpybluebear: yeah.

SixStringGuy: then your just going to have to take care of yourself ;)

Grumpybluebear: eh, that's never quiet done it for me.

SixStringGuy: mama are you telling me you can't make yourself come?

My cheeks were warm from all the alcohol flowing heavy through my system. His words created a flutter in my belly and I started pondering questions I'd never thought before.

Grumpybluebear: never.

SixStringGuy: if you can't do it yourself then I'm guessing your boyfriend hasn't been able to. You've never had an orgasm have you?

Grumpybluebear: what does your voice sound like Jamie?

SixStringGuy: Lol. Why?

Grumpybluebear: because I want to be able to imagine your voice.

SixStringGuy: ok Sydney, I'll tell you, but you have to promise me two things first.

Grumpybluebear: ok. What?

SixStringGuu: first, you have to promise you won't me embarrassed next time we chat.

Grumpybluebear: why would I be embarrassed?

SixStringGuy: oh from what I know of you I'm sure you will be once you sober up mama ;)

Grumpybluebear: ok, I promise I won't be embarrassed. What else?

SixStringGuy: I'm going to send you one more message and I need you to promise after you read it you will log off and crawl into bed.

Grumpybluebear: you're so strange lol. Yes, I promise.

SixStringGuy: Ok. My voice is deep and gentle. Now Sydney I want you to take off your clothes, turn off the lights and get under the covers. Imagine my voice whispering against your ear telling you where to touch yourself, my breath tickling against your neck. Let your hands roam over your body, stopping at each place you find that makes you tingle or gasp. Stroke yourself. Pinch. Caress. Gently drag your nails. Explore yourself mama, and make a note of each of those places for next time.

He signed off as soon as he sent the message and I did exactly as his words instructed.