Relapse ★ Bucky Barnes

I Can't Take This Pain

Marlena rummaged through the compound medicine cabinet in an attempt to find what she was looking for, but she was met with absolutely nothing. This angered her, and she slammed the cabinet door shut before moving onto another one. She had been on the search for about half an hour and still had yet to find anything that would help her—relieve her of the burden of her current state of mind. Her thoughts were torturing her as they had been doing for the past twelve hours, and it seemed as if they only became worse the drowsier she grew to be.

Since Marlena had fled the courtroom earlier that day, she had been struggling to a tremendous extent. She was trapped inside her own mind, fighting to win a battle she was destined to lose. She couldn't seem to wrap her head around what she had witnessed earlier, nor did she think she wanted to. Marlena never would have imagined losing her father at the very hands of the man she loved the most, regardless of whether or not he was in the right mind. All it did was bring her pain—an unbearable pain that allowed her to fall victim to the deadly aspect of her abilities she had spent two years trying to force below the surface.

Marlena was a ticking time bomb and it only grew worse as the time passed. The news regarding her father's death had completely shattered her. The news regarding her father's death had broken down her walls, and Marlena wasn't sure if she would ever be able to find the strength to build them back up again.

Steve walked into the compound kitchen, stopping when he noticed Marlena rummaging through the cabinets. He now knew she was the reason for him being awake at two in the morning, but part of him was glad he was. Marlena was not stable, nor was she anywhere close to being stable. Steve worried deeply for her and he had been since the video footage began playing in the courtroom.

"Marlena, what are you doing?" Steve spoke quietly and groggily.

"I'm looking for some sort of medication," Marlena answered him as she slammed yet another cabinet door shut. "There's gotta be Adderall or Ritalin somewhere around this damn compound."

Steve sucked in a breath and hurried over to her, reaching up to grab her wrist before she had the chance to open up another cabinet. "Why the hell do you need that?"

"Because, Steve," Marlena said as she yanked her arm out of his grip and continued through the compound on the search for what she was looking for.

"Marlena, please," Steve called out as he followed behind her. "Why are you doing this?"

Marlena fought back the tears as she made her way up the stairs and into Tony's room, thankful that it was vacant. "I would rather we didn't have this conversation now, or ever, really."

"Well, we're havin' it," Steve exclaimed as he followed Marlena into Tony's enormous bathroom. He watched as she reached up to pull open his medicine cabinet, and before he could think she was pulling out a prescription bottle for Adderall.

"Finally," Marlena breathed out as she closed the cabinet door and turned around, the bottle in her hand. Before she could even make a move to open it, though, it was being snatched from her hands. Marlena shot her head up to look at Steve, her broken hazel eyes glistening and filling with slight annoyance as she gazed up at the blond man in front of her. "Give them back."

Steve shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. "Not until you tell me why you're so desperate to have them, Marlena. Are you–were you planning on taking these and. . ."

"God no," Marlena scoffed.

"Then why the hell do you need them?"

Marlena bit her lip as she looked up at him. Her eyes began to well up with tears as she was met with the images of what she had witnessed earlier. She could feel the burning pain inside her becoming worse and worse as her thoughts continued their reign of terror inside her mind.