A Secret Vow

9 Smooth Like Butter

When the door shut. I curled my body and laid on my side. Dying of embarrassment. Pulling the sheets over my head. I tried to signal my mind to stop the broken record that kept annoying me with its awful memory of my voice. Repeating and repeating me saying "dear". I squeezed my eyes and frowned so intensely, like a child's first encounter of a lemons sour juice. 

Why did I say something so unnecessary?

Dear?

Yuck.

A word so distasteful to my tongue, making it touch the roof of my mouth.

I pull the sheets off my head and wander my eyes around the rooms white walls. Trying to distract my mind. I noticed hanging photos that framed unfamiliar faces, and a giant bookshelf filled with books, placed at the end of the room, revealing each of their unique spines. Laying on the surface of a small cabinet, I noticed a photo that was beautifully framed in gold. Curious, I got out of bed and walked across the room. Passing all the photos that were framed with wood. I picked up the framed photo and saw a white little boy. He was wearing blue trunks, black shoes, white socks, and a white shirt. Holding hands with a black little girl. She was dressed in a long purple gown that had a stain at the end of its fabric. Holding a flower in her left hand.

Smiling.

Holding the little boys hand.

I was then interrupted by a knock on the door.

I put the photo down as if it were never touched.

I walked toward the door and opened it to find a maid.

My eyes widened.

"Hello Ms. Rosz" said a maid.

"Edmund was told by his father to show your mother and father the garden" she explained.

I could tell just by looking at her shiny dark skin, it would feel as smooth as butter.

Unlike mine.

"Edmund told me you felt ill and sent me here to assist you. Would you like some warm tea?" she asked.

Still silent, she continued telling me what she could bring. I noticed how full and plump her lips were.

I rub my lips together.

Trying to get rid of my envy.

I sat back down on the bed and told her I needed some ointment for my wounded hand. Giving me a sweet smile she excused herself and left.

I laid there and closed my eyes.

Picturing his thick black hair. Curling slightly at the ends of his neck.

Shouldn't Clive be showing my mother and father his garden?

I flick my eyelashes up.

Remembering how neat and tidy Edmunds dark blue suit was compared to Clive's dirty gardening rope. Edmund probably didn't even touch that garden.

I remember his dark gaze.

Where is Clive?

Is he still at the table?

The door opens and the maid comes in with a bottle.

Taking off the cap, she placed it on the cabinet next to the bed.

She dipped her finger in the ointment and asked for my hand.

As I raised my hand, she placed the bottle on the cabinet and supported my hand with her own. She began to apply the ointment with her free hand.

I was right.

Smooth like butter.

Finishing, she looked at me with her brown eyes and asked if I felt okay.

Lying, I told her I felt much better.

Showing me her glowing smile, she placed the cap back on the bottle and asked me if I needed anything else. Telling her no, she tells me to rest and headed toward the door. Watching her short hair sway, I stopped her with a sudden question.

"Are you that little girl in that photo?" I hesitantly asked her.

Not turning to me but turning toward the photo. She went silent for a second.

"Yes it is Ms.Rosz" she answered.

I looked at the picture frame and back at her.

I didn't know what to say.

She then chuckled and bluntly asked me, "did you think it was me because of the colour of my skin?"

I widened my eyes and choked on my words.

"That! That is not true!" sounding like an idiot.

She gives me a smile and tells me she was joking.

All the stupidity weighed me down and made my head fall. I looked back up at her.

She slowly plays with her hair and softly says,

"He is a very kind man".

I look at her.

"Yes. Yes he truly is" I say.