50 Ways to Kill Voldemort
1. Transfigure him into a bug, then spray him with pesticides.
2. Strap him to the railroad track and run him over with the Hogwarts Express.
3. Lock him in a room with Fluffy the three-headed dog.
4. Give him a poisoned apple.
5. Kill Harry and destroy the Horcruxes in Mordor .
6. Tell Nagini that Voldemort's a Hufflepuff. She'll bite him.
7. Tell the Death Eaters that Voldemort's a Hufflepuff. They'll Rebel.
8. Give him an 'I <3 Hufflepuff' t-shirt and put a picture in the Daily Prophet. He'll die of embarrassment.
9. Pour the Draught of Living Death into his pumpkin juice.
10. Turn him pink.
11. Feed him one of Neville's potions.
12. "Tom, I am your father." Then cut off his hand leave him there to bleed out.
13. Shrink him to the size of a beetle and step on him.
14. Shrink him to the size of a beetle and drown him in a goblet of pumpkin juice.
15. Transfigure him to a pig and turn him into bacon and eat him
- Or you get everyone in the wizard world to rebel on him with these:
16. Yo momma so ugly the basilisk looked at her and it died.
17. Yo momma so fat she has the Goblet of Gravy.
18. Yo momma so fat her Patronus is a cake.
19. Yo momma so fat a boggart took one look at her and turned into a salad.
20. Yo momma so fat the Sorting Hat sorted her into the House of Pancakes.
21. Yo moma so fat her wand is a Slim Jim.
22. Yo momma so smelly her spot on the Marauder's Map is a scratch-and-sniff.
23. Yo momma so fat she has to Apparate in sections.
24. Yo momma so fat she looked into the Mirror of Erised amd saw a steak.
25. Yo momma so ugly even Voldemort won't say her name.
26. Yo momma so fat when she joined the Death Eaters, they changed their name to the Ham Eaters.
27. Yo momma so ugly she makes Voldemort look like Hedwig.
28. Yo momma so fat she ate the Death Eaters.
29. Yo momma so ugly she scares the dementors away.
30. Yo momma so ugly she lost a beauty contest to a troll.
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Hey Guys!
Sorry for the short chapter, but it was just such a
Funny idea I had to add it! Next chapter up soon!
Ok, so I Know that were getting a little sidetracked,
When this is supposed to be a 'How to Annoy Voldemort
to Death' book. If you would like it to just be a 'How to Annoy
Voldemort to Death' book, let me know in the comments section.
However, if you like the other add ons, also let me know.
Post:
Y for; Yes I like the add ons
OR
N for; I would like to stick with 'How to Annoy Voldemort to Death'
If we end up with more Y's than N's, then the next
chapter will be how to 'Turn the Death Eaters Against Voldemort'
~Byz Peepz
