My Chemical Romance

Fifteen (back to NYC!)

When Jay pulled onto the highway, heading towards NYC, I wanted to cry.  He must have noticed the sad look on my face because he patted my thigh from the driver seat and said “Cheer up, Yankee.”  I flashed an unconvincing smile and said

“Sure thing, Jersey.”  Glancing over at me after he changed lanes he said

“You could at least try to make it somewhat convincing.” 

“I’m not really in the mood to try,” I said with a shrug.  I rested my head against the cool passenger seat window and watched the snowflakes collect on the windshield.  This morning was the last time I’d see Frank for a long time.  Sure, we’d Skype, but it’s just not the same.  I almost started crying when he wrapped me in our goodbye bear hug, which is just something we did before every deployment he went on.  Like one giant hug could make up for all the ones he couldn't give while he was away. 

I’m not really sure how long we drove for before Jay pulled off to get gas.  “Do you want anything,” he asked before getting out of the car.

“No thanks,” I said, still leaning against the window.  I didn’t even feel like getting out of the car to stretch my legs like I usually do.  I need to snap out of this.  I’ll snap out of this.  Later.

A minute later a steaming Styrofoam cup was being dangled in front of my face, a tea string swinging at its side.  I looked over to see Jay smiling at me, “Smile and you can have it.”  I couldn’t help but give a sincere smile and clutch the cup as he lowered it into my hands. 

“Thanks, Jay.  You’re too sweet.” 

“So I’ve been told,” he said with an adorable smile as he started the car and blasted one of our favorite bands, The Used.          

 I sipped the hot green tea as Jay pulled back onto the highway, more grateful for it then he probably knew.  Kurt was complaining about how burnt his coffee was and Link just continued to rub it in his face.  “So how’s that burnt coffee?  Since you like your coffee like your soul does this mean your soul is burnt?” 

“No, but your face will be in a minute if you don’t shut up.”  Jay and I laughed at the bickering that was coming from the back seat.  When they say that laughing is the best medicine, they aren’t kidding.  After laughing hysterically from Link, Jay, and Kurt bickering and arguing over stupid stuff, I felt so much better.  I’m not sure where I’d be without guys like these to be completely honest.

 As we got closer to home our conversations grew quieter since Link and Kurt were falling asleep on and off.  At one point they were both out like lights which left Jay and I talking to each other.  I self-consciously poked at my scabbing lip as I thought about how to answer his question about plans for tonight.  He’d wanted to know if I was free to go and eat dinner with him and the guys, but I wasn’t sure if I had to work or not.  I probably didn’t but I would go home and check my calendar first, just to be on the safe side.   

“How’s the lip,” he asked before I could answer his previous question.

“Fine,” I said, pulling my finger away from it.

“Sore?”

“Duh,” I said as I lightly touched the bruised side of my face.  “I think I’m gonna have a scar.”

“It’ll be cute.”  I looked over at him with surprise.

 “What?”

“What,” he asked in that way someone would so they didn’t have to repeat something or wanted to end a conversation.  But I wasn’t sure I had heard him right.  Had I missed a not or a just kidding in there somewhere along the line?  I must have.