Angels Redemption

Chapter twenty six: Waiting

(Rafael's pov)
It's been days. Days!! Since I last spoke to Iris. I don't know if she's alive, or if she's dead. I don't know if she's half alive and suffering somewhere. I don't know if her family survived or anything. I'm left out of the loop. And it sucks!! Running my fingers through my hair in frustration I pace back and forth through the living room. "Easy there tiger. You may run a hole straight through the floor" I startle slightly and curse myself for not being more aware of my surroundings. Looking up I see its Rain. She looks at me tentatively and then sits down.

I sigh and mumble "sorry. I'm just stressed. I need to know if Iris is alive. I'm so scared, because I know I should have done better and she's paying the price for my mistakes. I just need to let off some steam" Rain nods in acknowledgment. I turn away now utterly at an odds for what to say. Deciding to make do on my words I go and walk. I walk until I realize I have left the house and can actually breathe. Looking up at the sky, light blue with puffy clouds, I smile and sit down. The grass is soft under my fingers and curls around me in a caress. Looking up and around me centres me.

It helps me calm down and to see that everything can be alright. Hopefully. Closing my eyes I lay back on the grass and let the smell wash over me. Sweet grass, fresh air with a hint of fall, crisp leaves, and an undertone of something I can't put my finger on. Letting out a huge sigh I let my mind wander to what I don't want to remember but refuse to forget...

...smoke curls in the sky. Flames bash at every living thing. Scream ricochet in the day. But of all of that it's the still body before me that scares me most. Her skin covered in soot, ash, and blood. Her hair splayed out and messy. Her cheeks gaunt, her chest with a wound that still bleeds. But even with all of that she's still the most beautiful creature I've seen.

I caress her cheek and beg her to live and to open her eyes. But I get nothing. As I look up to my brother I feel the rage of hell overtake me and I know that nothing in the world will ever take that away. Because they've taken away the one person I love and trust COMPLETELY. As a snarl rips it's way from my throat I bend down and whisper in Iris's ear "I will keep fighting for you no matter the cost. Because you're worth fighting for. I will fight for you until my last heart beat. I will fight for you even as hell rages its claws on this earth. You are my world. I love you baby girl. If I'm fighting I need you to fight too.

Fight or flight you choose?..."

I blink and I'm back outside. All the aches and pains come back. And a guttural growl erupts from inside me and I cry. I don't care if it's not 'manly'. I need it. I need her. I miss her. I miss everything about her. Her smile, her laugh, her hugs, her kisses, her jokes. I miss her courage, her strength. I miss her soul. I miss smiling with her. I miss seeing her eyes glow when I walk into a room and I miss knowing that the glow in her eyes is because of me.

"Ugh... Iris if-when- I get back I'm never letting you out of my sight. I promise." Wiping my tears away I sit up and start to head back. Then I feel a slight trickle of cold liquid pool down my back and cheeks. It's raining. Great, just freaking great. I rush to make it to the porch before it downpours. I'm one second too slow. I catch the tail end of the rain and as I hop on the porch I look at the rain and a very dark and sad thought echoes in my brain.

Rain fell from the clouds like the tears that bled from my heart...
***
Rain looks out the window and stares at the grey sky. I can tell she's not happy that I'm not letting her see or talk to Damen. But I have to. I don't know what she'll do?! Maybe I'll go with her and supervise. God I sound like I'm babysitting children.! Making up my mind, I state with a bored tone "ok you can go see Damen for 20minutes. But I have to supervise and make sure there's no funny business. Capiche?" Rain nods and hugs me tightly. She bounces her way to the stairs that lead into that hallway and bounds down the stairs.

She reminds me a lot of Iris. But I quickly wipe that thought away before the pain can tear me apart. I make it down the stairs slowly, just to annoy them. And as I pull out the key I look into Rain's excited, hopeful eyes and all the pain comes flooding back. All that pain of not knowing and betrayal and anguish. Everything hits me at once. I open the door and watch as Rain runs in. Damen envelopes her in a hug and kisses her with such a passion I look away. Seeing that look of love, of happiness, of pure adoration in their eyes makes me miss having someone look at me like that. I miss the euphoria that comes when the one person you love and trust completely walks into a room. Seeing Rain and my brother get that, it makes me sad but happy too. Swallowing my own self pity I keep watch at the door.

As I do I wait. I wait for time to pass, for the seconds to tick by. I wait for the next ten years to pass. Everything I'm doing now is waiting. Waiting, waiting, and more waiting. Can this feeling of dark sadness ever go away? Will my pain and suffering come to an end? I hope so. But for now I watch as my brother and Rain get their small happily ever after. Wishing and praying that my own will soon come too...