Star Trek Voyager: Fragments

Star Trek Voyager: Fragments (Chapter 15)

For a few impossibly drawn out seconds Kathryn Janeway stared down at the fragments of her favourite coffee cup, watching the dark stain of spilled coffee spread its way over a large patch of her Ready Room’s carpet with much more interest than it deserved. Yet she didn’t dare look up to meet the gaze of her true object of attention, the one that made her heart race and her palms sweat. The rumble of a dry chuckle caressed her ears, and still without looking up she could picture the wry, teasing, upward turn of his lips as he said, “Mourning the loss of your caffeine fix Kathryn?”

That did it, broke the ice so to speak, her head snapped up. “Well, it was my favourite cup.” She retorted with a light shrug, unable to stop herself from returning his playful grin, but as his face became more serious, even saddened, her emotions plunged back down into darkness. “What are you doing here Jaffen?” He opened his mouth but another panicked question had left her lips before he could answer, “Kadan didn’t alter your memory too did he?”

Jaffen’s head shake was slow and heavy and Janeway’s heart clenched in confusion as she caught a hint of regret in it. “No. I am what I seem, a worker looking for work.”

A lump rose in Janeway’s throat. Perversely, at that moment she’d almost been hoping that he’d suffered the same ordeal as her, and then he would understand. “I didn’t mean to mislead you Jaffen, really…” She was shocked by how pleading her own voice sounded.

Jaffen’s face softened as he stepped forward and placed a warm, calloused hand on her arm, rubbing absent circles into it with his thumb. “I didn’t say that to make you feel guilty Kathryn, far from it.” He assured her with an affectionate smile, “But it is the truth, I’m as far from a starship Captain as someone could be.”

Kathryn clenched her teeth in frustration. “You’re a gifted engineer Jaffen!” she reminded him hotly. She watched him shrug doubtfully and followed his gaze around her Ready Room before adding, “Being a Starfleet Captain isn’t often all its cracked up to be.” She admitted with a sigh.

Jaffen smiled at her knowingly, “But sometimes it is. I know you Kathryn; you’re too bull-headed to stick with a job unless you believe it’s worthwhile.”

She laughed weakly, “You’re right about that!” She dropped her gaze to his hand still on her arm and covered it lightly with one of her own hands. “And you do know me, better than anyone has for a long…long time…” She trailed off as emotion closed off her throat.

Jaffen’s other hand suddenly brushed her cheek, and she was suddenly aware of the tear sliding down it that he’d so simply wiped away. “You’re doing great Kathryn, look at what you did for Quarra and at your crew; they’re so loyal to you…”

Kathryn again lifted her face to meet his intense, searching gaze dead on, struggling to swallow a lump in her throat. “Sometimes loyalty just isn’t enough…” She whispered brokenly against his lips before pulling them into a sweet kiss and leaning into his suddenly tight embrace.

“Seven!” Chakotay shouted hoarsely as he knelt over her lifeless body and desperately shook her shoulders. “Goddamnit Doctor!” he spat out in frustration when she made no response, her implants sparking even more fiercely, “Where are…”

He was cut off by the buzz of the transporter directly beside them and suddenly the Doctor’s familiar presence dominated Astrometrics. The hologram barely allowed himself a gasp of shock before he was down on his knees beside his unexpected patient, unceremoniously pushing his senior officer out of way as he used his tricorder to assess the obviously critical situation. “Her cortical node is shutting down!” He exclaimed, horror overtaking his professionalism for a moment before he glanced back at a ghastly pale Chakotay. “What happened here? She was in good health an hour ago…”