Writing Music ( A Zayn Malik love story)

Breathless

Sitting across me in the limo is my mum and Lori, each of them holding in their hands a drink from the minibar. I keep glancing out the window, impatient to know when we are going to arrive.

Lori’s father rented the limo to bring us to the restaurant to make up for not being able to come to the dinner himself. Zayn and his family decided to drive to  the restaurant instead of taking the limo.

We finally arrive at the restaurant, I walk through the entrance and let the hostess lead us to the table. The first person I see is Zayn, his chocolate puppy dog eyes grab my attention as they always do. He is even more handsome than he was in my dream. I feel my heart flutter in my chest as I see him staring at me with his sexy smile.

“Zayn!”

I see Lori run from behind me and into his arms. I feel like a fool for thinking that he was smiling at me when his girlfriend was standing right behind me. A great weight is dragging on my heart as I see the two of them together.

I walk past the two of them ignoring them and grab a seat next to Zayn’s oldest sister as far away from them as I can get. I breathe a sigh of relief when they sit on the opposite side of the table.

All through the dinner I try to ignore the two of them but I can’t help but steal glances at them. Each time I sneak a peek at them I feel my heart breaking a little more. Why did I ever think that I would ever have a chance with Zayn especially when he is with Lori?

I manage to distract myself by talking with Doniya.

“How has your writing been Carla? Am I able to reserve an advance copy of your first book yet?”

“I am having trouble finding a publisher that will accept a story done by a teenager.”

“Have you asked your mum? After all she is in the publishing business.”

“I know to never work with family. I do not want my first book to be published by my mum.”

She goes to reach for her wineglass but accidentally knocks it over spilling some of the wine on me.

“I am so sorry Carla.I guess I have had too much to drink.”

“I am fine, really its just a dress. I will just run some water on it and it will come right off.”

I excuse myself and walk toward the ladies room. I see Zayn exit the men’s room and I quickly try to get through the door hoping he doesn’t notice me. I am not fast enough as he moves between me and the door.

“Carla, why have you been ignoring me all night?”

I force myself to look up into his eyes. I almost forget to breathe when I see his chocolate eyes staring at me. I remember the answer to his question when I feel my heart start to beat again. My hesitation is replaced with rage.

“You may have won your audition but you are still as thick headed as ever Zayn. I guess you do not remember what happened last night.”

I see the realization dawn on his face.

“You’re right I am an idiot.”

“You are at least smart enough to tell me how you feel. Tell me that the kiss did not matter, tell me it meant nothing to you. Was it just practice for kissing your future fangirls?”

I feel like I could shatter in a million pieces if I hear him tell me that the kiss was meaningless but I still want to know. If he does not have the same feelings as me then the sooner I know hopefully the lesser my heartbreak.

“The kiss mattered to me. I would never kiss someone I didn’t love. I love you La La.”

He surprises me by leaning in and kissing me again.My breath escapes me again as our lips meet. I want to believe that he is telling the truth that he loves me but I remember how he was acting with Lori as though there was nothing between us. I break the kiss and push myself away from him.

“I love you Zayn but you are with Lori right now. I do not want to hurt my friend.”

I hear heels walking down the hallway and quickly slip pass Zayn into the ladies room. I see Lori turn the corner as the door swings shut. The weight of the guilt on my heart weighs down more than ever.

I look at myself in the mirror and see that my lipstick is smeared a little. I am still conflicted about my feelings  for him. I do love him but I also do not want to cause tension between him and Lori. I know that he loves me also or at least I believe that he feels for me the same I feel for him. But his words mean that he only kisses people he loves and I have seen him kissing Lori more times than I can count.

I hear the door open and I release my grip on the sink. I did not realize I was gripping the sink so hard that my knuckles were turning white. I force myself to turn and quickly look at who just came into the bathroom; its Lori. She walks to the side of me and in the mirror I can see that her lipstick is smeared like mine is and her hair is more disheveled.

I feel my chest start to constrict and I feel like I can’t breathe. I wonder if she still felt the warmth of my lips on his. My vision starts to get blurry and I feel Lori’s hand grab my arm to steady me so I don’t fall over.

I faintly hear her say, “Are you okay?”

I manage to reach in my purse and wrap my hand around the small cylinder container. I bring my inhaler to my lips and press the button. I start to breathe normally again and I take the inhaler away from my lips.

I turn to face Lori and I see worry in her violet eyes.

“I am fine really it was just an asthma attack. The excitement got me all riled up and triggered it.”

I am certainly not the best liar in the world but she does not look anything more than worried.

“Are you sure? I can go and get your mum.”

I try to think of an excuse that will prevent me from having to see Lori and Zayn together again. The last thing I need is to have another attack from the stress.

“No really I’m good. I think I will catch a cab home. Could you let everyone know that I was not feeling well and went home?”

“Let me at least walk you out to the cabs then.”

I just nod my head yes not wanting to argue with her. She walks me out to the cabs and pays the cabbie before I am even in the cab.