The Mindless Man's Paradise

Chapter seventy-six

  Cyrus and I annihilated the opposing force.

  Every minute it seemed, Cyrus was throwing someone in the fire, slitting their throats, or stabbing their chests. In the mean time, I was shooting every person I saw, not missing a single target. Before I knew it, I was out of bullets. I only got to use my knife a few times before I realized that either everyone was dead, or had fled the scene.

  With Cyrus’s ruthlessness, combined with my newfound bloodlust, we were impossible to beat.

  We had totally underestimated ourselves.

  The battle was over within thirty minutes. I had nothing so much as a scratch on me, just barely unscathed.

  Once the silence of death fell over us, I fell to the floor and wept.

  I didn’t weep for the dead, but I wept for myself. I wept for what I had used to be. I used to have a conscience when I fired a gun. Now it was my second nature. Was this what Cyrus has turned me into? An unforgiving killing machine that was willing to kill hundreds so that she could live?

  I was angry at myself, and then I realized I was angry at Cyrus.

  His arm was around me, which I didn’t notice at first, but when I did I shoved it off of me.

  “This is all your fault!” I trilled. “I used to feel conflicted about this sort of thing, Cyrus. I used to care when people died. But now I can’t, Cyrus. I felt nothing as I shot all those people. I want to feel something but I can’t. Deep down, I think they deserved it because of what they did to Aurora and Jensen and Kian! You did this to me, Cyrus. I’m a monster!”

  I dropped my bloody knife to the ground so that I could wipe my eyes.

  Cyrus looked like a wounded animal, his face conflicted with grief, guilt, and now, hurt.

  “Aspen, I-”

  “No! I should have said this when I first saw this side of you! What excuse could you possibly come up with to make up for this?” I blustered. “This is unforgiveable, and now, because I fell in love with a cold-blooded murderer, I have become one as well.”

  “Aspen, we have to get out of here. It isn’t safe. We need to run.” He made a valid, point but I was not letting the subject go.

  “Okay, but this isn’t over, Cyrus. I expect an explanation.”

  I would not leave him either, of course, but we needed to sort out this dilemma. It would cause a rift in our relationship if we left it until it augmented into something much, much worse.

  I didn’t want to leave Cyrus, but I would if I had to.