Kpop Fanfic | Short Stories

Don't say it | Suga

Yoongi looked at her as if he was watching a shining piece of diamond, sleeping beautifully on his bed.

He knew that it was wrong. Being here in his room, under his blanket and wearing his own shirt could end up with him in the prison. Worth, in a grave.

He wasn't scared of dying, he never was scared about being with her. The moment he saw her, he swore that he would protect her till he dies. He swore on keeping her alive.

He was scared of not seeing her again, not being able to be by her side.

He didn't know how he ended up doing this. He had been suppressing his feeling for so long. But when she came to his room with puffy eyes, he couldn't restrain this anymore as he pulled her in his arms, closing the door behind them. Leaving the two of them in the room alone with frustrated feelings.

Slowly, Yoongi reached his right hand to her pinkish cheeks, caressing it with his thumb, feeling the softness of her skin. He couldn't get enough of her beauty or how her lips perfectly matched with his. But he couldn't do that. He couldn't continue being like this.

Tracing his finger on some of her hair locks, twining them around his finger, he sighed, knowing that this beautiful girl could never be his.

She let out a small whine, melting his heart, when he brushed her hair behind her ears. Yoongi smiled, watching her fragile body moving as her eyes slowly opened.

When she opened her eyes and realized where she was, she half smiled and crawled into Yoongi's lap who was sitting at the edge of the bed, looking at her with eyes filled with tears. She hugged his waist as she lay her head on his lap, letting Yoongi's arm wrap around her body. She burned her face in his stomach and breathed his familiar scent.

"Can't we..." She started her voice is barely audible.

Yoongi let out a heavy sigh, knowing already what she wanted to say. But they can't.

"You know the answer, princess." Yoongi said, tightening his arms around her. "I should walk you to your room before anyone in the house wake up."

She shook her head into his stomach. "I don't want to leave."

"Princess..."

"No." She snapped, lifting her head to look at him in the eyes, just into his weak soul that needed her the most. Her eyes were red with tears, they soaked them and she kept them in. "No, I don't want to go. If I left, we would have to pretend that this never happened. That we don't have feelings for each other."

Biting his lips, he cupped her small face in his hand as he pressed his forehead on hers. He also didn't want this, but being together was the last thing they could actually do.

"Princess, I'm nothing but a bodyguard to you. We can't do this."

"Yoongi..." She cried, her tears now running down her cheeks. She held his face with the both of her hands, keeping him close to her. "But you mean more than this to me."

"You also mean more than this, princess. You are the love of my life." He caressed her cheeks with his thumb.

"You too. I--"

She was cut with Yoongi's lips pressing on hers. Captured them into a passionate and hungry kiss, leaving the both of them craving for more.

Pulling away from the kiss that left the both of them breathless, Yoongi pulled her into his arms, burying his face into her hair. "Don't say it. If you said it, I wouldn't be able to let go of you."

She cried, clenching her fist into his shirt. "This is unfair. I only want you."

"That's how we are different, Y/N." She felt her heart burst in her chest. This was the first time he actually says her first name. Making her chest clenched painfully and she hugged him tighter. "You can have anything in this world, but I can't have you and you can't have me. We are different. Our world is different."

"Let's run away then."

Yoongi pushed her away from him and looked at her with angry eyes making her cry more. He didn't have to say to know that he didn't like the idea. "Don't think like this again."

"But--"

"We can't." he said firmly. "You should leave." Yoongi dragged her out of the bed as he started to unbutton his shirt from over her body. His hand trampling and shaking, he needed to get her dressed and walk her to her room before the maids woke up or else it would be the end of both of them.

He needed to let go of her.

She held his hands, stopping him from unbuttoning any farther. His face was already soaking with tears and his shoulders shaking as he soundlessly cried. She never saw him crying before.

Wrapping her arms around him, Yoongi pressed his back on the wall behind for a support, leaning his head on her shoulder, his arms keeping her close to him. "Do you think it is easy to let go of you when I'm finally can hold you? Do you think that I actually want this to happen to us?"

She shook her head, not saying a word. She gulped hard, understanding that Yoongi was having as much hard time as she did.

She couldn't let him suffer again.

She placed a soft kiss on his cheek, giving him one last hug before whispering in his ear. "I will leave now, Yoongi."

His hand slumped from over her waist, next to his side. The moment Y/N pulled away from him, she missed his warmth, leaving her heart cold. She prevented a sob from skipping her lips, placing the back of her hand over her lips.

She grabbed the nightgown that she was wearing before glancing one more time at Yoongi who didn't move from his position. He was standing as a lifeless statue, head titling downwards.

"See you in the morning, Yoongi. Goodbye!"

Yoongi's body slumped, sliding down the wall to the floor the moment she went out and closed the door behind her.

At least he was still going to be her side, protecting her and see her every day. Running a hand over his face, Yoongi banged his head into the wall behind him, knowing that this was going to be harder than before. He learnt how to touch her.

"We can't do this, princess."