The IRE of Winter

Chapter 33: THE PARTING

Just before midnight, I felt the need to sneak to the West wing of the palace. Standing in front of the door, Legolas' room has a sullen feel. My heart pounded. Should I say goodbye the least? My hand was about to knock on the white door but fear restrained me; afraid that I might change my mind if Legolas would beg my stay.

There will never be an us, I know that now! Yet, despite the pain and guilt I had for loving him, I still linger round near his place, hoping he would come out of the door and plead me never leave his side.

After nearly an hour of waiting, the door suddenly swung open and came Legolas on his silver and brown evening clothes. He looked different in plain tunic and unbraided hair tucked behind his ears. Uncertain how to face him, I darted to the nearest door pretending I wasn't there for him. But I was a terrible liar, my eyes betrayed me.

He stepped out of his room and came. For a moment we were silent until he had me cornered.

'What brings you here child?'

I twisted the doorknob thinking of escape but it wouldn't open. My knees tingled eager to run. Stupid! I came here to see him and now I feel this strong urge to scram. Defeated, I turned to him with cheeks burning. 'T--There's something wrong with the doorknob.'

'It's locked, Safirah. It has been locked since you left..' Then he motioned near me until he was inches away.

I quickly turned my back to leave but he suddenly snatched my hand and said in a soft and tired voice, 'Why did you not knock? You antagonize yourself too much.'

There was a sudden shift of mood in his eyes, his gaze weakened me. 'Maybe there was no need at all.'

'I thought I was your sun, you were quick to loose hope. Of all places you could be, you've chosen my father's side. Why? You have put a dagger in my heart Safirah, and you've wounded me in the most painful way.'

Tears trickled down my cheeks, my heart crampled as I looked into his eyes. A shiver ran through my arms, suddenly I cannot move. I became incapable of controlling my tears. It was too painful to look at him. I love him, more than I loved myself, and the same love had shattered me. I turned to him closer, pressing my lips tight, as if it would do good to stop the tears from falling. There were so many things I wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell him I love him more than life itself, that I am willing to embrace the cold to protect him; but the knife in my heart cut too deep that words couldn't surface my lips.

Slowly, without a word he wrapped his arms around me. It made me feel even worse. I sobbed. Leaning against his chest, I wrapped my hands around his waist. He tightened his hug kissing my forehead. I felt his pain, his heart drummed a sorrowful beat.

'I was afraid, Legolas,' I whispered. 'I am sorry.'

'We can still run away from here. I promise I will bring you safe South, where there will be no snow to make you remember the terrible things of the past. Ithilien, Safirah. We can start a new life together. You do not have to do this. Let me protect you instead. Let me heal you, melamin.'

'How I longed to hear those words from you, my love. You know we cannot do that.'

He then pulled me to his room and shut the door behind us. My back against the door, he tapped my lips with his. Tears never ceased to fall. It was a painful kiss, probably our last. Finally, I got enough courage to break away, bitting my lip to stop my crying. Legolas bent leaning his forehead against mine while his gentle hands touched my cheeks. With closed eyes, we both panted.

'Let us win this war together and after that we shall start over. We should travel South, to the Gray Forest North of Ithilien, away from my father, away from everyone else. Never...will I leave your side again.'

'That's not even an option.' I shrugged.

'Then choose me. I have no love for the crown. It doesn't even fit me.'

His remarks amused me. Legolas brushed my cheeks with his thumb but tears kept on falling. He was quick to stop them from reaching my chin, brushed my cheeks and kissed me again.

I was first to pull back. He looked into my eyes with a hint of wonder, his hands still holding my chin.

'It is enough to know you care. The past might have set our paths in separate ways but no matter what happens, I will always run back to you. I promise,' I said pulling his hand off me and pressed something on his palm.

Tears feel down his cheek when he saw the red stones in his hand.

'It needs fixing, and I don't know how to fix it,' I sniffed looking down at the broken bracelet. 'You're the only one who could fix this thing. Keep it! Then after this war I might get it back from you.'

'Safirah---'

'You will always be my sun,' I whispered gazing at his teary eyes. 'You should travel South and keep this promise - if we should meet again, I promise I will choose you.' I craned and gave him a gentle kiss before swinging the door open.

Then I hurried out of his room, swept the stairs and ran out of the palace still trying to compose myself. I hated myself for loving him too much, too blind to see what my love has turned me into. Legolas deserved someone better than me, his people needs him. I cannot break my vows nor forget the debt I owed to the thousands.

Down the hallways, I trotted towards the servant's chamber. It was past midnight and few guards still manned their posts. Torches lit the halls, burning bright orange as it danced steadily in the air. Minutes later, I sneaked inside Armien's room, the young elf was deeply asleep. Carefully, I opened the wooden chest and pulled the clothes out, dark green and brown ranger garb, a pair of black leather boots.

I picked up the dagger and the sword I brought from the North. Then I slipped out of the room and down to the hallway. The old man must have left, I head to the West gate recalling the map Gandalf showed me.

An orc stronghold, it was a mountain fortress far North. The image of the map flashed in my head but the name I cannot recall. King Thranduil's army will march East in two days to prepare for the worst, I should get to that mountain before the third day ends. To cut the roots of the dark tree, Gandalf said, then the enemy would march back to their holes upon their master's death, that I hope.

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Up Next: EMBRACING THE COLD

I felt the need to separate this chapter. It would be too cruel not to have them talk the least. The last chapter will be written in 3rd person, fingers crossed, I hope it won't be bad. Do you think Safirah should have told him the truth? Comments your feedback below. -Haz🙂