Fire and Ice (Book 2)

Chapter 29 - Fear

ROSE'S POV-

Standing in front of my entire family, there heartbroken gazes set on me, was incredibly nerve racking. Not only was I about to tell them all how Lily died, but of all of the horrible things I've done in the last 6 months. Not only had I broken into the ministry, but I erased part of my uncle's memory, stunned my mum and aunt, illegally stole ministry protected papers, and left my husband. And if there's one thing my fathers taught me it's that you don't walk out on the ones you love. But I want to be honest. No, I need to be honest. I'm sick of secrets.

So, I told them everything. I told them that even when we were still in the hospital we were planning. And then I told them about how we saw the messages in the newspapers and about the missing time turner. I told them why we'd broken up and why we'd rushed the wedding. I explained every last detail of our ministry break in because I needed to get it out. I couldn't have all of the things I've done sitting in my head because I was going to explode. I had too much information and I didn't know what to do with it anymore. The I told them about Pheronixon and nobody remembered. Nobody could remember it's existence but I showed them the file and I told them about Scorpius talking to Ingrid Youtz. We had the proof so they had no reason not to believe us. Then I told them that I'd left Scorpius. The looks of disappointment almost broke me. I couldn't stand it. I tried to run out of the room but Scorpius stopped me. 

He sat me down next to Albus and took over for me. He talked about the parts I'd left out. He explained why I left and said that it was fault. I tried to protest but he wouldn't let me. He told everyone of the lies he had told. How he'd gone to see Lily and that he'd been forgetting things. He told them that I'd been tortured again and the scream that came from my mum ripped through everyone in the room. She cried and cried because she'd almost lost her little girl all over again and it just wasn't fair. Scorpius stopped talking until she'd calmed down.

He then talked about how we'd been in contact with Al and Alice the whole time and that caused a whole nother fight between everyone because "it wasn't fair that they got to talk to us." Once everyone had calmed down Scorpius finished our story with the end. How Lily had fallen on to the cold ground and took her last breath only hours ago. The room was silent and everyone had tears in their eyes. Seeing that he was done talking Scorpius sat down and put his arm around me.

For what seemed like hours we all sat in silence. After a while the quite seemed to bear a weight that I just couldn't handle. I hadn't seen my family in 6 months and now that I'm home again I can't be around them. I failed. I didn't come back having killed Lucius. I wasn't heroic. I was scared. I had disappointed everyone and I knew it. My parents didn't come home until Voldemort was dead. They battled and lost loved ones, but never came home until they'd won. And I hadn't done that. 

Nudging Scorpius's side he looked down at me and I prayed that he knew what I was thinking. I just wanted to go back to my flat and have him next to me. He seemed to understand and stood up. "I think we're going to go." He said. Nobody answered but he grabbed onto me and we apparated away. We landed in my flat and I realized that it was no longer mine, but ours. Alice had seemingly moved her stuff and I assumed she'd found somewhere else to stay. I'd have to thank her later.

"It feels kind of strange doesn't it? We've been married for 6 months and we still haven't ever lived in a proper home." He said as he ran his hand over the scratchy material of the couch. I nodded numbly. "Are you alright?" He asked. I shook my head and he pulled me into him. "It's not supposed to be like this." I said into his chest. "Like what?" He asked. I pulled myself out of his grip and looked up at him through watery eyes. "Once I graduated I was supposed to get a job at the ministry. I was going to marry you and then live a normal life. Lucius wasn't supposed to ruin everything. He wasn't supposed to practically tear us apart, kill my cousin, and try to rip my life to shreds. And because of him we've been gone for 6 months. 6 months and we didn't even kill him. I vowed to myself that I wouldn't come home until he was dead. But we did come home and I could practically feel the disappointment radiating off of everyone. I let them down." I said as a few tears slid down my cheeks.