There's a difference between a real smile and a fake smile. But the hardest part is telling them apart. We choose to feel how other people want us to feel. That's the sad part. I've been talking to my friend Jonathan lately and i choose to feel happy when i'm around him. In reality inside i feel dead. I just wish i can be happy all the time but i can't. The only time i'm happy is with one person and he's the only person i feel safe with but lives thousands of miles away from me. He's a senior this year and next year he's off to California for college who knows when i'll see him next. The closest i've been to him in months is on the phone facetiming. He's been there for me and i can't deal with how far he is from me anymore. I thought i can make it but i can't do it anymore. I try talking and hanging out with other people but it isn't the same i date other guys but they aren't even close to how he makes me feel. When i think of him i feel empty and lonely. I distract myself with pain and blood maybe he's the reason why i hurt myself just to get him off my mind and focus on the pain. Every time i hung out with him and he saw the scars he always told me i'm better than that. Hugged me tight then held my hand and kissed my head. That's when i felt safe but now he can't do that to me anymore. He can't come to my rescue when i need him. It's like part of me is missing. I feel helpless.
YOU ARE READING
My Life, My Story 2
Literatura FaktuThis is a story about girl who is confused and conflicted with what life has to give her. With tension and her trying to figure if she should tell the truth about her life.