Permanent Vacation // 5SOS

06. Cody

It's been a few days since Tess got out of the hospital, and she pretty much lives with Lucifer in the back of the bus now. The boys tend to avoid her for the most part, understanding that her medication makes her extra moody.

Speaking of the boys, I've been to three of their concerts now. They were nice enough to get me in for free and give me backstage access. Some fans started getting a bit upset about that, but they can seriously just suck it up.

Anyway, because of the concerts, I'm in a constant state of distraction and Tessa's been fussing over me since it first happened, saying I need my normal self back in time for seeing Tony and Mel. I really don't see her reasoning since I can drum in my sleep. Yes, that's happened before. Don't ask.

"Hey, look." Calum's voice automatically draws my attention, even though it's a whisper. I've noticed every time he speaks my ears perk up. Not complaining or anything though, just... It's just one of the many perks of being friends with my idols.

"Tess?" Michael says. We've all been sitting on the floor of the bus's small kitchen, eating whatever this black stuff is. It sorta tastes like cheese. I look up at my sister expectantly.

"Hey. Um, can I join you guys?" She asks, looking like she doesn't want to be here but clearly she's made up her mind that she's going to sit with us. Everyone looks at me to answer.

"Yeah, sure." I say. She nods in thanks and sits down across from me and beside Calum. She bumps her sore elbow on the way down and hisses with pain.

"Fuck that hurt." Her tone makes me feel so guilty, just like every other time she says something hurts. It's nice that she's sitting with us though because she's been avoiding everyone lately. I can't help wondering what's changed her mind.

"You okay?" Ashton asks. It seems a little halfhearted to me but then again maybe I'm imagining things. How could they still not like her when she's been avoiding all of us for so long? Maybe they're waiting for her to snap like she normally does.

"Uh, yeah." She looks at all of the boys uncertainly, then her gaze turns to me and she leans forward, gesturing me closer as well. "Who are they?" She asks quietly. Um, what?

"Haha Tess, very funny." Michael rolls his eyes. Tess gives him a confused look.

"How do you know my name?" She asks, still confident like her usual self, just a little more hesitant. I grab her hand and her confused expression turns to focus on me.

"Tess, we've been travelling with them for about five days now. This is their bus." I tell her softly. Her face forms a deep frown.

"We're on a bus? Well, I guess that makes sense. But Cody," her face changes to an expression of dread and suspicion. I nod for her to continue. "Why are we with these guys? Where are Mum and Dad?" Holy fuck. My eyes go wide and I can feel the blood drain from my face.

"You... You really don't know?" I ask. She slowly shakes her head, and that's when I can't take it anymore. I get up and walk towards the back of the bus, knowing she'll follow.

"Dakota?" She's confused, as am I. How is this happening? Did she forget because she hit her head so hard? Why is she only now forgetting? Why not straight away? "Dakota what's wrong? You always tell me everything, so why is now different? What don't I know?"

"I don't know how to... Tess I can't..." I don't have the words to finish my sentences. Her frown only gets deeper and I look away, not wanting to think about it and definitely not wanting to talk about it. To explain in detail everything since whatever the day she last remembers is would be torture for both of us.

"Cody." She grabs my hands and I look up at her, then I know what I have to do. I pull out of her grasp and walk over to her suitcase, unzipping the front pocket and pulling out my only chance to break it to her without completely wrecking both of us. "Is that--?"

"Dad's hat." I nod.

"But he wears that everywhere. Why do you--" She cuts herself off and her eyes get watery as she realises. I take a shaky breath, knowing that for once I have to be the strong one.

"Together forever." A sad smile forms on my face but she doesn't cry like I expected she would. Instead, her eyes seem to glass over and she stares at the hat in my hands. After a few seconds, she blinks and a single tear slides down her cheek as she looks up at me.

"Cody, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, I swear. I... I couldn't remember. Everything was gone. All my memories. I couldn't--" her voice falters and she looks back down at the hat. "Can we please put that away? I can't--" she shakes her head and turns away with a hand to her head. A dizzy spell. I guess the memory thing was a symptom of the concussion.

I put the hat away again quickly, not wanting to be able to feel the stiff fabric of it anymore. When I get up, Tess is sitting on the couch with Lucifer, staring at the floor in front of her and patting the cat absentmindedly.

"Um, I'll go get you some water." I say, heading for the door so that I can leave her to think.

"No, I'll get it." She tells me. I nod and head out to sit down again. The boys haven't moved since we left, and all conversation stops when I walk in. I sit in the same spot as before without a word and the boys all give me questioning glances. I don't trust myself to say anything without crying, so I pull out my phone and check all of my social media.

I don't look up when Tess walks in, but I can feel the tension in the small space nonetheless.

"You okay Tess?" Michael asks.

"Shut the fuck up Michelle." My sister spits. There's a collective groan, but when I look up I can see that everyone's relieved.

"What happened?" Luke asks quietly from beside me. I honestly forgot he was there. I mean, I knew he was there I just wasn't thinking about him because who in their right mind can think about Luke when Calum Hood is sitting across from you?

"Nothing happened so mind your own fucking business." Tess hisses.

"Therese, if there's something wrong I think we have the right to know." Ashton says. I try to give my sister a look that says I agree, but her eyes are carefully avoiding me.

"Nothing. Happened." She's gritting her teeth. The glass of water in her hands is raised to her lips and she gulps it all down, then leaves the glass in the sink and heads for the back of the bus again. Nobody says anything for a while, but then just as things are starting to get awkward, Michael breaks the growing tension.

"Dammit." He sighs, getting up and stretching his legs a bit before walking away. He's heading towards the back room. Towards my hateful sister.

"What're you doing?" Calum asks, raising one eyebrow in an adorable look of confusion. I just want to pull him closer and kiss that beautiful face.

"I haven't played a video game in almost a week now and I can't take it any longer." Michael says with so much determination that I almost feel sorry for him; he's sure to get sworn at. A lot.