Little Miss 5SOS

Chapter 46

Blue's pov

"Are you guys mad at me?" I ask softly, speaking for the first time since we got into the car. We had just pulled back into the hotel parking lot. I wanted to ask the boys that before we had to face the other Hemmings.

"Not mad, just upset. We're upset because you lied right to our faces. We wanted to help you. That's why we has you under protective watch. We didn't want to take you to the hospital for help because we know how much you hate hospitals. But instead of just letting us help you, you lied right to our faces, saying that you were okay. Now look where we just came from," Michael answers, not even looking me in the eye. It felt like my heart was breaking. These boys had done so much for me and instead of letting them help me, my pride got in the way and I tried to kill myself.

"Come on, Blue," Luke calls. I climb out of the car. None of the boys grab onto me, but they walk around me. If I tried to get away they would catch me. I wasn't even going to try to run. I don't want to.

~

"Blue!" Liz shouts, squeezing me tightly. I stand there, looking at the boys over her shoulder. Andrew, Ben, and Jack join the hug, blocking my view of 5 Seconds of Summer. I just stand there silently, feeling guilty.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Jack demands. Liz gives him a look. He ignores her.

"I was thinking the world would be better without me," I answer truthfully, sitting down on the couch beside Luke. He doesn't say anything.

"That's not true at all," Andrew says. I shrug, tired of hearing the same thing, which I'm not exactly sure if I even believed.

"Boys, we're going to keep Blue with us in Australia," Liz says, not leaving any room for argument.

"Mum that's not fair," Luke protests. Calum, Michael, and Ashton clearly didn't like that decision either. I was with them on this one.

"I don't care. Blue needs what's best for her and that's not staying with you four. She needs to be out of the spotlight," Liz reasons.

"No I don't," I cut in, "and I'm not leaving the boys."

"Blue that's not your choice," she says.

"It most certainly is," I reply, not backing down.

"I'm not going to lose my only daughter, who I just got back. You've been in the spotlight recently and you almost committed suicide because of i-"

"That's not why," I snap, "It was because all of my life I've felt like a waste of space. I got tired of it. I'm not leaving the boys. Even if they leave me here, I'll find another way back to them. I'll swim if I have to. Just let me go with them. I'll get help, I'll go to a hospital, whatever it takes." Michael, Luke, Calum, and Ashton look at me surprised.

"But you hate the hospital," Ashton says.

"Yeah and I hate the thought of being away from you guys more," I say. Liz sighs, giving in.

"Fine. But you're getting help," she says sternly. I nod. I had every intention of following through with that.