And if I fall for you,
Would you fall too?
-Ed Sheeran.
Dear June,
Three words : I didn't know.
It's such an easy excuse, don't you think? You just say this and you stand there expecting everything to blow over.
I didn't know it was your birthday today.
I didn't know we had home-work.
I didn't know she was not feeling well.
I didn't know that sky was fucking blue in colour.
I didn't know that guys were filming us June! I didn't know!
I didn't fucking know.
And I guess that is all well and good. You know. Not knowing.
Not knowing how much it hurts looking at your goddamn face.
Not knowing how wrong it feels sneaking glances at you in the cafeteria.
Not knowing how it suffocates me, seeing you so indifferent. Like I was just a bad dream you wanted to forget.
Then again, maybe I was.
You say you did not know? Bullshit.
You didn't know how everybody saw me as a desperate freak in school today Declan?
You didn't know how I couldn't breathe when I saw you standing in front of me, denying everything?
You didn't know that today was the only time so many people acknowledged my presence? And that there was nothing pleasant about it.
You didn't know that it hurt when they made fun of me? And you said nothing.
You didn't know that my eyes were swollen because I had been crying all night Declan. All fucking night.
You don't know that I miss you? I shouldn't. But I'm stupid. It cannot be helped.
I can't do this anymore. I don't- I can't-
WHY?! WHY DID YOU DO THIS?!
I fucking hate myself! But for a moment, with you, I used to feel like maybe I might just have a chance.
But then you went and stripped me down. You stripped me down till I couldn't recognize myself.
Why did you do it? Do you hate me?
I don't want to cry anymore? I'M NOT FUCKING CRAZY !
I don't want to fall down any further. I want to get up and face you goddamn it!
But I'm failing Declan. I'm failing every time.
So, I guess, I didn't know too.
I didn't know how to love without getting hurt.
I didn't know.
-June.
YOU ARE READING
June.
Short Story[COMPLETED] Dear June, Deep breaths. Count to ten. Take a step. Take another step. You can do this. You've got this. Just breathe. What happened to you? Was it the pressure? Was it the depression? Was it the loneliness? What was it? Do you know, or...
