Here's all the Pain you Caused.

Sleep (poem)

I LAY IN BED TONIGHT,
I MEAN, I NEVER REALLY GOT UP.
BECAUSE I CANT.
I CANT GET UP.
I SCREAM AT THE CEILING.
I PULL MY HAIR.
I TRY TO TEAR THE SKIN OFF MY BONES.
I DONT KNOW WHATS WRONG.
STOP ASKING ME WHAT'S WRONG.
GOD DAMN IT I DO NOT KNOW WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY MIND.
I REALLY HOPE I FALL ASLEEP TONIGHT.
I WISH I FELL ASLEEP,
AND NEVER WOKE UP.
BUT I KEEP GETTING THESE NIGHTMARES, FULL OF SCREAMS AND BLOOD. AND THEY WAKE ME UP FOUR TIMES IN A SINGLE NIGHT. DRENCHED IN SWEAT BREATHING HEAVILY.
yes, I prefer to call them nightmares more than bad memories.
I'VE GOT THIS HEADACHE AND IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY.
MY HEAD IS DIZZY.
BUT IS IT A HEADACHE?
GOD DAMN IT IS IT MY ANXIETY OR IS IT REAL?
DO I TAKE ANOTHER PILL OR DO I LET IT BE?
I MEAN, I TOOK FIVE ALREADY.
WAIT, IT SAYS ONLY TWO A DAY.
OH WELL,
AT LEAST I MIGHT FINALLY FALL ASLEEP.
AND MAYBE THIS TIME, EVEN MY NIGHTMARES WON'T BE STRONG ENOUGH TO AWAKEN ME.