Don't Shoot the Messenger! (Adventures of a Critic)

The Calm Before the Storm

There comes a point in every critic's career where you just KNOW you're in trouble. 

Sometimes this happens frequently. Sometimes it's just every once in a while. But every now and then, you just have this feeling that creeps up on you that you think, 

"Oh crap, this author is going to be very mad." 

This doesn't mean you've made a bad critique. It may not mean anything against you except the fact that somehow, somewhere, the critic is going to get mad. 

Most of the time this happens for me because I've written too much and it's very daunting for the author. Other critics I've heard know it when they focus on a part that they can tell the author just loved-but it just doesn't work. A common one I hear (and have experienced) is when a book has already been critiqued by other people and those people didn't find the same issues as you did. 

There comes a time where you're just waiting for that little bubble to come up, that little notification that says, 

"____ replied to you". 

And then you read a bit of the nasty comment they have in store. You can feel it in your bones, how your shoulders tense, how you're already cringing at the long list of insults and "HOW DO YOU NOT UNDERSTANDS!?" just waiting for you. 

It's coming. This is the "calm before the storm". This is the waiting period, and it sucks. You find yourself on wattpad more often than you usually would be if it weren't for waiting for this author to reply. You're checking your device (phone, tablet) for notifications, you're on your computer way more than normal. 

In a way, it's a sort of thrill. No one likes getting yelled at by the author, but there is this undefinable thrill about waiting for this author to reply. It's an even bigger twist when they aren't angry (which doesn't happen often), but you just wait. You're anxious. You're not sure if you're horrified by the thought of being yelled at, or if you're excited by the fact that you can discuss with them-and maybe prove your right. 

I don't like confrontation, I don't like arguments, but I love to discuss. If an author has a question about something I said, I'll be honest, I'm more then HAPPY to discuss with them. If they prove me wrong, then that's great-I love learning new things. If I prove them wrong, I can't help but just feel more proud and more assured that I know what I'm doing. Discussions, for me, are a win-win. If I lose the discussion, it's still a win. If it ends with a "I agree to disagree" then that's great too! It shows that we're professionals. 

I don't like arguments. I don't even like winning arguments (well, maybe I do a little-I'm human), but overall I consider those lose-lose situations. Winning an argument usually leaves the other person with a low self-esteem and pissed off at you forever. Losing an argument means that's what it's like for you, and there's the "hangover" headache from being yelled at through text. Arguments suck. 

Critics, if you feel like you're going to get yelled at, but aren't sure why-a lot of times it has nothing to do with how well you critiqued. It's how the author reacted, or how you feel they're going to. Usually, you've done fine (not always, but a lot of times), it's just that haunting feeling that you overestimated how well the author can take what you've said. It happens. Sometimes you're going to get yelled at and you will lose an argument and you won't understand why. 

Simply look over your critique. If you see problem areas-make a new message. This may upset them further if you've already written a lot, but it's better to remedy a bigger problem with a new comment then leave it hanging and have that being their weapon they bring to an argument. If you see that you've written a lot DO NOT DELETE ANYTHING. This is a discussion area, this is where you have them talk to you and you discuss if any of it isn't true-in which they still keep the message but they know they don't have to deal with it and you can be left knowing that your critique hasn't gone to waste. If you find nothing that you can find wrong, but you still have that feeling of anxiety, you just have to pull yourself through it. Sometimes it's just the author and they're sensitive or intimidated by what you've written. It has nothing to do with you and you move on. 

Try to take something from every critique, but sometimes, you've done all that you can think of that's right, and at that point there's nothing you can do. 

A friend of mine just got one of these feelings after a critique, and it's a good topic. Critics, sometimes there's nothing more that you could've done. It's just the calm before the storm, and sometimes the storm bypasses you and the weather reports were wrong, and sometimes it's just a little rain. 

But... be prepared for a hurricane-just in case.