Redemption

Chapter Two

I am too eager; I run up to Christina right away. Her back is faced to me. She is playing some sort of drinking game with Zeke, Shauna, and a few other people I don't recognize.
"Christina?" I say.
She turns around, takes me in, and laughs. "Very funny." Tears spring in her eyes. "Who put you up to this, initiate? Joey? Is that you?"
I shake her shoulder. "No, Christina, it's me, Tris. I'm not an initiate. Who is Joey?" Does she not believe me?
She pushes me away. "Shut up! It's not funny! I saw her die! I saw her body! Just go away!" She sobs.
"Christina, please believe me." I am down on my knees, begging. "Please. Please."
"Fine. Prove it. What's the fear you laughed at in front of- in front of- Will?"
"Your fear of moths," I say without blinking. "And Christina, I'm still sorry. I am a selfish person. I wish he would have killed me."
Her eyes widen. "Tris? Is that really you?" She hugs me. "Your tattoos." Her fingers brush over my shoulder. "Your wound." She reaches for my neck. "But-how-"
"That's something I should tell all of you. Where's Tobias?" I scan the group of people. "Where is he? Who are all these Dauntless?"
She sits me down. "Tris, Tobias-" She breaks down into tears. Is he dead? I already feel a part of myself shutting down.
"Tobias left for the Abnegation sector after we found out about you," She chokes out. "It was devastating to see him like that. He almost took the memory serum, but I stopped him. He's living in Abnegation. Once the factions were restored, he decided to stay. He said he couldn't pick up a gun without thinking of your face, your cold, lifeless face."
I shake my head. "But that wasn't me. Nina was altered to look like me, tattoos and everything." He can't be in Abnegation. Was that really him I saw?
She raises an eyebrow. "Nina's dead?"
"Another time," I say. "Do you think-" I sob. I can't get it out. Factions aren't supposed to visit each other. If Tobias saw me, would he want to come back? They'd have to make an exception. He's Four, Dauntless legend!
Christina reads my mind. "They might. He might. But we don't know until we try."
I nod. We will have to try to get him back. Now that I have regained a bit of my sanity, I see Molly, a few of Uriah's friends, and Lauren as the group of people. I immediately recognize Gabe, who questioned my presence at the zip line after Edward was stabbed.
"Molly?" I say. "How the hell are you here?"
She smiles. "Once the factions were restored, the factionless had a choice to choose a faction again, if they made it through initiation again. I did, so now I'm back."
I can't bear to look at her. She supported the teachings of the Erudite and how they criticized Abnegation. She mocked my father. She lied.
"And Tris?" She says. '"I'm sorry for before. The pressure of initiation got to me. I know what you've been through, with the war and all."
"I forgive you," I say meeting her eyes. And I mean it. There's something in her voice that makes me believe her. Things have changed now. Maybe things will be balanced out for good. Maybe this is the attempt that will stick.
I take turns greeting people that I remember. But the Pit still feels empty. Tobias. Uriah. Lynn. Marlene. Tori. Will. Al. So many others I cannot count.
"Where's Peter?" I blurt out.
"Four should tell you. He helped him get to where he is now," Christina says.
"When can we see him?" I don't care if I am too eager. I have not been here in ages, I yearn for these people to see me, and for me to see them.
"We can see him right now, if you'd like," Zeke suggests.
"That'd be best," I laugh.

Zeke, Shauna, and Christina come with me, lead me to his house. But I ask to go in alone. They are very understanding.
I knock on his door. He answers almost immediately, a scowl on his face.
"What?" He spits the words out almost like they are bitter.
I put my hands on my hips. "Come on, Four. Don't you recognize me?"
He shoves me down the steps. "No, but I recognize who you are trying to be. Get out of my house, and please don't call me that name. I don't enjoy guests at this hour."
I press a hand to his stomach. Surely he will remember this.
He avoids my gaze. "You won't be able to do it, you know. She's dead." He turns to close the door.
"Tobias, please," I sob. "It's me. It's Tris. You've only called me Beatrice once, in Amity. You have four fears. Your dad beat you as a child, and your mother left. You chose Dauntless to get away from your dad. You were the first in your initiate class. You thought of leaving Dauntless, but once I jumped first, you stayed. You were my initiation instructor. You stabbed my ear with a knife. You showed me your fear landscape, then kissed me by the chasm. During the attack on Abnegation, I was shot in my left shoulder and you were taken away. You were put under a simulation and almost killed me. We escaped together, defeated Jeanine Matthews, and discovered the Bureau. There, you found out you were not Divergent, unlike you were told. Nina was killed instead of me and her body was altered to look like mine. You may have pushed me away over the years, but there is a person inside there who loves me. His name is Tobias Eaton."
He turns around. He draws his eyebrows together. "You are Beatrice "Tris" Prior? You have a brother named Caleb? You chose Dauntless because you were not selfless enough, no matter how hard you tried? You jumped first in your initiate class? You have six fears? You were the first in your initiate class? Your parents died within hours of each other? You killed your friend, Will? You almost died in Erudite headquarters? You forgave your brother after he led you to your execution? You were valuable to the Bureau? You have three tattoos, three ravens on your collarbone, the seals for Abnegation and Dauntless on opposite shoulder blades? You died in the hands of David, yet two years later you are back, telling me you love me?"
"Since you heard about me, you aren't looking at me like I'm a kicked puppy, or something." I am repeating his own words.
He wraps me in his arms. "Maybe you won't be in my fear landscape anymore."
I smile. "Maybe you were cut out for Candor, Four, because you're a terrible liar. I will always be in your fear landscape, whether you see my dead body, or I'm hurting and you can't do anything."
"How are you here?" He murmurs against my cheek. A tear drops from his eye and lands on my shoulder.
"That's something everyone deserves to know." I am standing on tiptoe, and it is bothering me. "Will you come back to Dauntless with us?"
He shakes his head. "I can't. I wish I could, Tris, but I just can't. I see weapons and violence differently. All I see is you getting hurt."
"If they let me stay, you can make sure I don't get hurt all the time. But I'm going back to the Fringe and turning myself into the Bureau if you don't come back. I would rather die than not be with you. It took me two years to formulate a plan with Matthew to ensure everything is working, and I don't want to wait any longer."
He stops me by kissing me. This takes me by surprise. I haven't kissed him in years. It takes me a moment to get used to his touch again. Then, its as if I don't have to think. I feel comfortable again.
"Come in here," Tobias calls out to Christina, Zeke, and Shauna. "You don't have to stay out there, you know."
I laugh.
"So," Tobias says. "Tell me everything."