Wattpad Clichés

54. Cliches, man.

just want to say that for life is the best christmas album ever. what i want for christmas and winter heat and falling for you and twenty four and for life are my favorites. if you havent noticed, that means the whole album is my favorite.

54. LETS CALL RANDOM STRANGERS FOR FUN?!?!

HONESTLY I LOVE CALLING RANDOM PEOPLE THAT MAY POTENTIALLY BE MURDERERS AND SERIAL KILLERS! THAT SOUNDS LIKE SOO MUCH FUN!

These books are so stupid and shows how stupid some people are. Like you never know like somebody may actually do some stupid shit like this because it's in a book. People are truly idiots like I caNNOT STAND BEING GROUPED IN WITH THE HUMAN RACE I WISH I WAS A TURTLE.

But yeah somebody actually left this concept on my MB and I was like "yeah-

GUYS I JUST STEPPED ON MY READING GLASSES AND THEY BENT HORRIBLY OH MY GOD I NEED TO TAKE THEM TO A GLASSES HOSPITAL THEY NEED HELP GUYS HELP ME ):

-this is relevant I need to write about this! Good job person!"

So here I am hittin that ass with a part two of talking to strangers: the Random Phone Call edition.

These start off with a slumber party. Ik you're thinking wtf is this bitch saying, but the MC goes to a slumber party at her friend's place and yanno what happens at slumber parties (unless you've never been to one in which im about to tell you)

So you play games and eat food and gossip and watch movies. Like idk about other slumber parties but my friends and I never painted each other's nails and braided each other's hair and talked about cute boys. Unless we were talking shit about them.

But at some slumber parties, you prank call random numbers (not like people you now, just put some random numbers in the keypad yanno). That's what happens in this book.

So the girl is dared by her friends to prank call a random number and she does bc she's too stupid to prank call someone that she knows yet they don't. I mean what idiot prank calls a completely random person?

Then when it's some crazy dude picking up the phone they'll look stupid af on the other end of the line. I cannot play anymore games with Wattpad and its cliches.

Yeah, she calls this number, and a ranDOM GUY PICKS UP BUT HE HAS A SEXY ASS VOICE. A lot of ugly guys have sexy ass voices. I mean, idk why tf after this party, she keeps calling this random guy bc he was nice and had a nice voice. But anyways.

yadda the party ends and yadda something happens in her "pitiful life" and for some reason, she feels like she can't rely on her friends to talk to so she just calls the first number in her call list: the random number.

I mean idk about anybody else, but if I feel like I can't tell you anything, bitch you aren't my friend. Point, blank, period. You are a damn associate lmao. Let's clear that up.

Second of all, you call some random person because you think "well i'll never talk to them again so" bITCH WYM! HE. COULD. BE. TRACKING. YOUR. NUMBER. CUTE GUYS CAN BE KILLERS TOO! Gosh, has this girl even seen Teen Wolf? There's a cute guy killer every season! This hoe is dumb as hell.

Cliches man. I swear.

That stupid plot continues for about a good ten chapters, and then she fiNALLY GETS A SNIP OF REALITY AND REALIZES:

She's. Never. Even. Seen. This. Person. Nor. Met. Them.

Then she gets all curious as to what this person looks like but she likes him at this point or wtv so does it even matter?

.. I really don't feel like going into detail so lets skip all that shit and go into when she meets him ((:

She meets him (because its that cliché where they happen to live in the same city or wtv) and he happens to be tall, dark, and handsome and everything sHE WANTED!

.. Because there wasn't a 95% chance that he wasn't what she wanted. There wasn't a chance that he isn't perfect for her. Of all the people in the world, this "random" stranger is the perfect guy for her. 100% perfect.

Notice how I put a quote around random? Well, yeah. I completely forgot to mention that this "random" guy is actually her worse enemy, and she didn't have his number blocked (like I do. I have my enemies' numbers blocked.) and she couldn't recognize this guy's voice over the phone and that he was always secretly in love with her! bUT SHE IS SUDDENLY COOL WITH HIM BECAUSE HE WAS THE GUY ON THE PHONE!

Cliches, man. Cliches.

Also, am I the only one who notices that this guy is always named after a Texas city? Houston, Austin, Dallas, San Antonio, TyleR, EL FUCKING PASO? BITCH SOME GODDAMN FORT WORTH LMFAO

LMAO IM SUCH AN IDIOT! I LITERALLY PUT TEXAS AS A CITY OF TEXAS! OH MY GOD I CRACK UP AT MY OWN GODDAMN STUPIDITY. MY GOD. I'm what-the-fuck flabbergasted.

Then they get together and kiss or wtv. I don't freaking know! I don't care! It was so stupid that I forgot it! I forget stupid, pointless things! Which is why I nearly fuCKING FAILED ALGEBRA!

Yes, I'm that cunt that is still bitter over High School and everyone in it.

.. Anyways, that new episode of Goblin though. That new episode of Solomon's Perjury though (lmao its still not out bc of the damn MBC Entertainment Awards).

But yeah, if you ever gain a friend who is talking to some random guy she doesn't know over the phone, tell her she is an idiot and put a dildo in her mouth while she's spluttering the bullshit and let her choke because she is Cliche.

.. I told you guys this book is Rated R for Ratchet and Racy.

-

.. B I O R H Y T H M.

GUYS!1!! The best thing in the world just happened to NCT stans that have watched Johnny patiently waiting in the SM dungeon for 8 years like the Sky Jackson meme:

THEY JUST(like days ago) ANNOUNCED THAT HE AND DOYOUNG WILL BE JOINING NCT 127!

I freaking teared up a little. Idk, just thinking of Johnny waiting for 8 fREAKING YEARS! That's a long ass time. And watching his friends and his buddies debuting, winning freaking Rookie Awards, and performing. And just picturing his face when they told him that they were putting him in 127, yOU JUST.. IDK. IM EMOTIONAL.

at least they didnt put him in nct dream lmao. i wouldve died laughing.