Intractable Emotion. (A GerIta fanfic)

Chapter I. LUST CAN DRIVE A MAN INSANE.

updated a/n (4.8.16):
hello new readers!! thank you so much for choosing to read this story. I felt like I needed to update this author's note because the other one made me cringe (it was written 2 yrs ago everything I did back then was cringy).
besides this note, I haven't rewritten any other part of this story. I still love GerIta just as much as I used to, and right now this story is still ongoing. I hope you guys really enjoy this fic; I've never liked how I wrote the beginning of it, but I'm happy with the progress I've made in it. ♡ feel free to pm me with any comments or questions, let's get this show on the road c:
xoolives.♡

~Chapter I.~

LUST CAN DRIVE A MAN INSANE.

+~<><<<>>><>~+

There he was, sleeping obliviously on my bed. His slender face looked sweet and peaceful on the warm pillow that laid under his soft brown hair.

This was the sight that had driven me crazy for three days straight.

Not the "I MIGHT JUST SHOOT A DOG'S HEAD OFF AND CARRY IT AROUND IN A SUITCASE WITH ME EVERYWHERE I GO UNLESS THIS CHANGES" crazy,

More like a "I SERIOUSLY DON'T THINK I CAN CONTROL MYSELF BUT I REALLY, REALLY HAVE TO OR ELSE I'LL PROBABLY HATE MYSELF" kind of crazy.

I've been this way since I've gotten closer to Feliciano.

When this started, he was just a small, wimpy country I thought I could boss around as I please. Then, it became more as if he was a very dependent friend. After a while, I realized, I had fallen for this sad excuse of a country.

Not because of his good looks (he is the grandson of the Roman empire, of course he'd be handsome), but I believe I fell for him because of the little things I first hated about him.

He's very weak, but it makes me feel happy knowing he depends on me.

He's always optimistic and annoys people with his happiness, but I can't help but smile when I see him so joyful.

Plus,

Even though he might give up easily at most things that are challenging to him, Italy seems very focused when he's indulging in art and cooking. It's so charming to watch him draw a clear blue sky, or happily serve me a plate of pasta.

And now, I have to stare at Italy, the one I love, sleeping in my bed, and I can't do anything about it. Well ja, I know if I become desperate enough, I can just pick him up right now and hold him tightly, but what kind of man would that make me?! I know I can't just go on my instinct like that. Even though he always holds onto me, I know even an Italian would be surprised if someone attacked them with affection. Germany is a stronger-willed country than that!

So, as you can see, I'm stuck in this situation, not knowing if I should disrupt his slumber and yell at him to get out (he probably wouldn't listen), or I should just hold my lust inside and lay down. But I wouldn't be able to sleep with his warm body next to mine! I'd explode! So, I go with option A.

"Hallo, Italy, aufwachen! Wake up already! Haven't I already discussed with you that I don't like it when you lay in my bed?! You have your own room, für die Güte willen!" I exclaim to the small Italian, shaking him softly.

At this, Italy opens his eyes slowly and yawn meekly, causing me to want to hold him because of his cute gesture.

"Aww, dai Germania~! I'm so sleepy, and it's a so scary sleeping in that big room alone, sometimes I think there's this big scary potato monster that's gonna bite my head off 'cause I don't like the potatoes you give me, but then I realize it's just because your house smells like potatoes. Y'know, we really should make more pasta to cover up that smell, cosa ne pensi~?" Italy answered back to me, putting on a pleading face.

I sigh and run my hand through my swept back hair. I know I can't say no to Italy, he just knows how to get what he wants out of me. "Okay, Fein, but don't curl up next to me, it makes me uncomfortable" I tell the sleepy Italian grumbly, as I reluctantly lay on the opposite side of him.

Right as I lay down, I can already smell Italy's warming scent around me and I almost become lost in it until I hear a soft voice whisper to me.

"Germany, do you think we could go to Japan's house to paint tomorrow, per favore~? I wanna paint one of those shiny fish he put in his koi pond, they're so pretty~!" Italy asked me, a yawn escaping out of his mouth afterwards.

"Ja, ja, but it'll never be tomorrow if we don't go to sleep now. Gute Nacht Italien, süße Träume" I whisper to him, trying to resist my urge to hold him.

"Yay, grazie Germany~! Sweet dreams, buona notte!"

"Gute Nacht."

"If I can even sleep tonight..."